Against Fate
by tartar12345
Summary: Sakuragi is given by supernatural power a glimpse of his rivalry's fate, which turns out to be connected to his own more than he had ever thought. Yaoi. My very first fanfiction, pls R&R. *On Hiatus*
1. The Vision

Hey what's up? This is the very first fanfiction I've ever written and posted; I know I still have some major work to do on written expression, but I just wanted to try for now! Pls R&R!

**The Vision**  
  
Sakuragi could feel his blood pressure mounting as he watched Rukawa Kaede make an ever-so-perfect shot. His Haruko chan was so infused with admiration that she was ready to fall over any second, which just added fuel to his already sizzling temper. He was more than ready to vent out his frustrations to the fox-faced boy when they got to the locker room.  
  
"Grrr...why did you have to come to Shohoku, you stupid fox? You must have been born just to ruin my happiness...!" His words trailed off as he caught a few seconds of surprise and some other unreadable yet clearly vulnerable expression in the raven head's eyes before they turned cold and emotionless again.  
  
"Why don't you ask yourself why you weren't born competent?" Rukawa shot back at him tonelessly.  
  
The protruding veins on Sakuragi's forehead looked ready to explode any minute. "What....!! Debasing the tensai's flawless talents! I ought to beat the crap out of you..."  
  
"Only do'ahos like you don't realize how stupid you are." He said in a bored voice, and completely ignored the fuming redhead's diatribe as he left the locker room.  
  
"Other than showing off his pitiful basketball skills, that stupid fox sure has a passion for making my day miserable." Sakuragi muttered to Youhei as they walked home from school.  
  
Youhei chuckled. "He has sure gotten better than us when it comes to pissing you off," he noted. Then, a thoughtful looked surfaced on his best friend's face.  
  
"What if...what if Rukawa and you never crossed paths? Where do you think life would be leading you now?"  
  
A pang of unexpected guilt hit the redhead when he remembered what he had said to his rival and the reaction it drew from him. You must have been born just to ruin my happiness! But he shook off that feeling to maintain his pride. "Hmph. It would be all for the better. Oyajii and Gori would hold me much more importantly for the tensai I am, and I'd be the number one player in Kanagawa by now. And of course, Haruko—"  
  
"Would you really have started and stayed in basketball if Rukawa were not there for you to challenge?" Youhei suddenly felt compelled to argue against the other boy.  
  
The question peeved Sakuragi greatly. "Geez, are you forgetting that I met Haruko first?"  
  
"Ah, but she probably would've gone to that all girls school down the block if it weren't for Rukawa, remember she told us?" Youhei countered again, and smiled in satisfaction when the redhead looked even more annoyed with his losing stance.  
  
The redhead could not think of anything to argue against right then, unless he were to say he'd rather not ever have played basketball, and nothing can force him to say that now.  
  
"FINE. Maybe Rukawa helped just a tiny bit, unintentionally, to get me into basketball, but that's all. We have no other purpose to see or have met each other." He muttered grudgingly, as they cut through their local park as a shortcut. Sighing, Youhei raked his brain to keep this debate going, but was suddenly interrupted by a young female voice.  
  
"You needn't worry so much about that boy." The boys turned and found them facing a young woman in her 20's, wearing a traditional fortuneteller's black cloak.  
  
"You seem to wish more than anything that Rukawa Kaede never entered your life, and there is no need to waste your energy on anger now. Instead, you should try pitying his fate, so the guilt won't haunt you later on."  
  
Sakuragi frowned. "What do you know about the fate of the tensai or that stupid fox, miss? And what's with that stupid black blanket in midsummer?"  
  
The woman smiled knowingly, ignoring that offending comment about her attire. "I have no need to confuse you with words. It will be so much easier and effective to show you." She stared straight into the tall boy's deep brown eyes, and for a brief moment, Sakuragi saw a strange glow filling her orbs. He felt his whole body weakening and control breaking down, but he was not able to break away eye contact. Then his vision started to swim, and his conscious mind sunk into a dream-like state.  
  
He found himself back inside the basketball gym, with practice going as usual. At the moment, all eyes were glued on Rukawa, who was posing to make a perfect shot below the basket. Suddenly, a huge cracking sound was heard, and a huge chunk of the glass basket frame detached and plunged down, bashing the stunned boy right on the head. Blood spurted all over, onto Anzai sensei, the two manageresses sitting by him near the benches, and Miyagi, who was standing four feet away on court. Everyone was shocked into silence for five or ten seconds, eyes as wide with disbelief and horror; followed came the earsplitting screams of terror and franticness filled the gym.  
  
Sakuragi, despite his half-conscious state, felt the blood rush from his face and his stomach twist at the sight, and vaguely saw Ayako, blood- stained and trying to control her distress, yell for the phone, so they could call an ambulance. Haruko had passed out then and there.  
  
The whole scene dissolved to reveal a considerably tall middle-aged man, and an older woman beside him who looked remarkably like Rukawa. They were in the same hospital and exact waiting area outside the emergency room he was in when his father was in when he had a heart attack; the memory of his father's death was mercilessly vivid and spared him no minor details. The man had his slender arms around the woman, anxiety and grief clearly portrayed on their faces. The doctor, still in his surgery attire, emerged slowly from the emergency room, his head bent.  
  
"He may not make it through the next hour," he said grimly. "Even if he did, part of his brain is so damaged that he may never be able to move his limbs again."  
  
The woman broke down into huge sobs at these words; the older man just stood there, seemly paralyzed with grief...  
  
"Yo Hanamichi! Snap out of it!!" he heard his best friend's voice full of anxiety, shaking his shoulders with all his strength...then Sakuragi was brought back to reality with a jolt.  
  
"You see, there's no need to hate him anymore...he's going to be gone soon anyways, and in a painful way." The woman said with a sly smile.  
  
"W-what did you do to me?" Sakuragi muttered, panting and his hand on his forehead, trying to get himself together.  
  
"I have the ability to see and convey future visions. Don't worry, there aren't going to be any unwanted after effects..."  
  
"You're just going to let him die like that? Since you know, why don't you warn that fox?" Sakuragi said with disbelief and dismay.  
  
The girl raised her eyebrows in surprise. "There happens to be strife between me and the Rukawa family, so seeing their beloved son's fate is joyous news to me. I just wanted to share my joy with someone. Why are you concerned? Aren't you happy that he'll be out of your way and your life?"  
  
Sakuragi was surprised and taken aback, realizing that it may very well have been his wish. But then he scowled. "Yeah, I would be, but not this way! The tensai himself needs to beat him and have him admit defeat, so he'll know better to show up and annoy me!"  
  
The young fortune teller narrowed her eyes. "I thought I'd be able to make at least one person happy with this news; turns out you're not the one."  
  
She gave out a deep sigh and was about to walk off, but not before looking Sakuragi right into his eyes with a dead serious glare. "Be sure you tell no one, especially Rukawa Kaede himself of this vision, otherwise misfortune will befall you as well." She warned.  
  
"What! Why you...are you trying to threaten the tensai?!"  
  
She turned away. "I have no control over anything. I just interpret certain rules of the supernatural and advise people for or against them." She said indifferently, and went on her way, leaving Sakuragi too dumbfounded to speak, and Youhei lost in confusion. He tugged on his friend's shirt.  
  
"Hana, what's going on here, buddy? Help me out here, I'm totally lost. What did she do to you? Why were you standing there like you were sleeping?" He was surprised to see a hint of dread and helplessness in his best friend's normally lively and determined eyes.  
  
"Youhei...I need some real advice on this."  
  
Three hours later, Sakuragi was sprawled on his mattress, recalling all that had happened that day with wonder, when the phone rang.  
  
"Hey Hana, it's me."  
  
"Youhei..."  
  
"Hanamichi," his friend said a little hesitantly, although his voice was all serious, "I've been thinking about that vision you were talking about, and...that weird lady's right, whether whatever she gave you was authentic or not. You have no reason to do anything for or against Rukawa. Unless you're doing this just because you don't want to see Haruko devastated, but she'll get over it. You guys have been teammates for a while, but it's his own personal fate and life, which you or anyone really shouldn't know about."  
  
"Yeah...maybe it is about Haruko-Chan..." he murmured. Then he frowned. "Wait a minute—I can't believe this! You're the one who taught me to save the wimps and nerds from getting beaten to death by those senior creeps!"  
  
"True, but were any of those situations involved in getting yourself hurt real badly or even killed? If you believe Rukawa's gonna die, you should also believe how you might too, if you interfere. Hana, it's not worth helping a guy who cares about no one but himself."  
  
Sakuragi sat up. "You're underestimating the tensai's amazing ability to survive anything! But yeah...you sure are right about Rukawa."  
  
"I don't want to be so blunt, but I doubt Rukawa would give a damn about you if you guys swapped shoes. And what would your parents think if you threw away your life so recklessly, the life they worked so hard to raise?"  
  
"I get your point, Youhei. The tensai's well-being is not worth risking for that selfish fox." To Youhei's relief, Sakuragi's tone sounded much more sure and confident.  
  
"Alright. Just forget about all of this and try to get some sleep, okay? 'Night."  
  
The redhead tossed down the phone receiver. Youhei was absolutely right about that; he should not let his parents down, even if they aren't with him anymore.  
  
"That stupid fox Rukawa would probably be thankless if I did something anyways, treating a sweet girl like Haruko as if she was non-existant. Maybe he deserves to die." He told himself out loud, confident that he had convinced himself of the right decision. However, as he drifted off to sleep, images of Rukawa earlier that day with that vulnerable look in his eye involuntarily flooded his mind, depriving him of any peaceful rest.  
  
TBC (Hopefully)


	2. The Right Decision?

_First of all, I really want to thank those that took the time to post their reviews. It did a lot to encourage me to write on! I just hope this chapter's able to hold my reader's attention; I tried to make it as complete and concise as possible, but it's probably still kind of wordy and has some unnecessary lines. I'll really start developing the plot and get in-depth in the story within the next few chapters, if I continue. Pls continue R&R. _

_Disclaimer (forgot to put it in chapter 1): Slam Dunk and its characters are not my property._  
  
Chapter 2: The Right Decision?  
  
A waiter of the small noodle restaurant glanced curiously at the table where two tough-looking young men sat.  
  
"Normally, that penniless redhead delinquent would bother other diners to give up their dinner or bully me into treating him a few extra platters," The waiter whispered to his friend. "Today, he hasn't even finished his second bowl of soba yet. What could be eating him?"  
  
"I guess I'll be able to finish my own dinner for once, seeing how bad your appetite is today," Youhei was grinning, but couldn't repress the note of worry in his voice. Sakuragi didn't answer, just picked at his food with a dull expression on his face.Ever since that encounter, Sakuragi had fallen disturbingly silent; his eyes were droopy due to lack of sleep, and he didn't look half as exhilarated even when Haruko praised him today.  
  
"Maybe you should have gone to Okinawa with the rest of the gundan, Hana. You were the one who won those plane tickets in the lottery, anyways."  
  
"Humph. The tensai has much more important things to do than go on vacation and harass girls." Sakuragi drew in a deep breath. "You know what, Youhei? I had the most brilliant idea yesterday, but it didn't work. I tried banging all the basketball frames in the gym last night to see if they'd fall, but they were sturdy as ever! There was nothing—not even a crack!"  
  
_Oh drat, he's still obsessed with that damn vision._ "I thought you said you wouldn't prod in Rukawa's business anymore."  
  
"It has nothing to do with helping that fox!" The redhead exclaimed, looked both irritated and sheepish. "It's because...because...it's because I have to make sure no one else gets hurt...yes, that's it! What if Haruko chan happens to be standing under that very frame meant for Rukawa? The tensai needs to protect her from every possible danger!"  
  
"There are three very good reasons why you shouldn't do anything to Rukawa or the basketball frames," Youhei told him, getting a little exasperated. "One: with the strength you, Rukawa, and Gori dunk the ball, the frame should have already fallen down by now. Two: You don't know just when to prepare for the incident; it may tomorrow, it may be next YEAR. Three: if you do that, you'd still be meddling with Rukawa's fate!"  
  
"But that weird woman with the blanket said something will happen only if I told someone else about the vision...hey, but I did already! I told you!" Sakuragi said, looking a little panicked.  
  
"Hana, don't worry, I'm sure she was referring to the people who would try to prevent the incident; I'm certainly not one of them." His friend reassured him quickly. "In case anything happens to Rukawa, Haruko will need as much support as possible. You have to be there for her." _And of course, you may finally have her for yourself too. But that's an awful thing to say out loud._  
  
"Absolutely! I have to be there for Haruko-chan. It's the least I can do to repay her kindness. That's one promise you can count the tensai to keep!" Sakuragi proclaimed, but uncertainty was still evident on his face.  
  
Youhei sighed. He understood the reason why Sakuragi felt this way. The more you try to bully someone you don't truly hate, the worse you feel for them when a big tragedy happens to him or her. Especially if you are as moody and naively sensitive as Sakuragi. _I know Rukawa's not a bad person, and I wish I could help Hana alleviate his guilt... I just have a really bad feeling about this, and my intuition has always proven to be right so far..._  
  
What he didn't know was that something else, something deeper than sympathy was bothering the redhead. A feeling that even Sakuragi himself was clueless about, except...that feeling vaguely resembled the fear and helplessness of losing what really mattered to him. It all started because one day after practice, it was the first time for so long that Sakuragi saw it in a person's eyes: vulnerability, disappointment, or even hurt; not just plain anger or fear when he physically threatened someone. He'd seen them at the time when he pulled away from his mother, not knowing she was dying; when he beat people up in front of his father; and the time at the locker room when someone's look reminded him of those times...  
  
"Oh shit, stop thinking about it!!" Sakuragi suddenly yelled, bringing his fist down to the table, making the tableware and the other diners around him jump.  
  
Sakuragi pressed his forehead against the table as frightened diners hastily left the restaurant.  
  
"Hanamichi...what's gotten into you?" Youhei demanded softly, after recovering from his shock and confusion.  
  
"Nothing, Youhei..."  
  
"You're lying, Hana. And this is one lie that I can't let you go with. Is there something more to this incident that's bothering you?"  
  
"I said it's nothing."  
  
"Hanamichi, I know you better than that. You should let me in on the important things!"  
  
"It's none of your damn business; stay out of it!" The redhead snapped in a sullen voice.  
  
Youhei was taken aback. Sakuragi had never talked to him like that in a serious situation. "I've always respected you despite your inconsiderate ways, Hana, but now you're being a real disappointment. I'm your best friend; I have the right to know..." he started, with sternness in his voice.  
  
"Don't label yourself as my best friend, Youhei! You don't know crap and you have no right to judge me at all!" He blurted out. "Whatever you know about me is from teasing and fighting, you can't ever truly understand how I really feel inside! I..." Sakuragi stopped abruptly, realized what he had just said.  
  
Then he saw it again on Youhei's face: that thing he feared seeing the most.  
  
"Oh god..." Sakuragi felt helplessness and remorse rush through him. "I didn't mean that, Youhei. I...I..."  
  
"You know what, Sakuragi Hanamichi, if you are so taking the few friends you have for granted, you'll end up having none." his friend said in a deceivingly calm tone full of pain mixed with anger. "Go do whatever the hell you want, if it's so much more important than our friendship!" With that, his friend stood up and stormed out of the restaurant speedily.  
  
"Hey, listen to me, god dammit! I'm not like that at all...Youhei, wait! STOP!" He cried desperately. In his panic to follow his friend, he tripped and fell disgracefully to the restaurant floor, face down. For a moment, the redhead lay there, unmoving. Then he could no longer hold his tears back.  
  
"Stop. Stop, please...I'm sorry. Don't leave..." He pleaded in a barely audible voice, his proud ego gone for the moment, as was Youhei.  
  
The owner of the restaurant had been infuriated at the commotion Sakuragi had caused and thought about calling the police; but seeing the state Sakuragi was in, he changed his mind and put down the receiver.  
  
He walked cautiously over to the redhead who was still slumped on the floor and bent down beside him. "Not that I'm trying to throw you out, kid...but you shouldn't be here right now; people are staring at you. For your own sake, you'd better go somewhere private." He told the young man as gently as he could.  
  
Sakuragi lifted his tear-stained face and stared at the owner blankly, as if he didn't comprehend. After a few minutes, he picked himself up slowly and dragged himself out the door, completely heedless of the countless stares following him.  
  
His best friend's physical and mental support had not gone unappreciated by Sakuragi; however, Youhei was right; he probably had sort of taken it for granted, like did his natural strength and stamina. Heaven knows that open and loudmouthed as he was, Sakuragi entrusted his secrets to Youhei more than anyone else after his father left him. It was just that Sakuragi had been too angry and ashamed at himself for not saving his father that time and lied saying he passed away during that accident along with his mother The mounting inner conflicts were too much for the inexperienced boy to handle, making him blurt out things he never meant to.  
  
He finally got to his house. His dark, empty home. Usually Youhei would insist to spend the night here whenever he perceived the redhead was depressed, but not tonight. Sakuragi slammed the door and threw himself on his bed. Having lived such a carefree life for such a while, he was totally unprepared for the sudden wave of emotional events; it fatigued him beyond anything he'd ever felt. No one there to listen to him vent, no one to give him sincere advice. He's on his own to face the world. Again. He didn't even bother turning on the alarm clock in case he oversleeps tomorrow's practice. For now, he cared about nothing. He just wanted to forget all of it by sleeping it off.  
  
About a forty minute bike ride from Sakuragi's house, a raven haired young man leaned against his desk chair, gazing outside his bedroom window.  
  
_You must have been born to ruin my happiness!_ It's been two days, and those damn words were still echoing in his head.  
  
_Of all people, why did that do'aho have to remind me of my worst dread?!_  
  
Did the do'aho really think he was that lifeless as to have no emotions other than for basketball? He was comfortable being all by himself, because he had no choice but to preoccupy himself with the only thing he felt confident in.  
  
_I've succeeded; I've finally entered the inter-high championships, but even so, what now?_ Funny how he's been repeatedly asking himself this question ever since basketball became an obsession, how the empty feeling got stronger at every big step he made. So unrestrained in opportunities and skills, yet at the same time, so trapped.  
  
But who could he blame? He hated social life; his mother insisted that he at least try a relationship, especially since he's such a girl magnet. There is no way he'll share anything with those ridiculously shallow chatterboxes, nor those who are too busy with their own lives to try and understand him.  
  
Sakuragi Hanamichi was all different. As stupid and retarded that redhead was, it felt so purposeful helping the redhead's potential reach its peak, just like a father teaching his son to be the best he can be. He needed to put the Sakuragi down when he gets overly proud of his achievement level, to remind him not to be content until the redhead was as good as himself. But of course, there were a few times when he could not resist making known the pride he felt when he witnessed the vast advancements: That glorious slam dunk in the Shoyo game; those last few seconds with Sannoh when Sakuragi succeed that three-point shot; that high-five they shared equally, the first one that ever meant something to him. Knowing the redhead wouldn't be where he stood today without his generous criticisms and jibes. Now that's a genuine reason for him to be smug.  
  
_He is so short sighted, jumping with excitement at the slightest bit of improvement and praise. But maybe that's why I admired him. He's able to appreciate the simplest and littlest things, while I never felt satisfaction attaining any of my own goals, never knew how to savor the taste of victory. I'd immediately strive for larger, even more complex ones and never feel the least happy._ Whenever he recalled those moments with Sakuragi, a strange gratification would fill him, those empty feelings gone.  
  
_But now I know that in reality, he thinks my sole purpose of life is to make him miserable, huh._ Recalling those unintentionally harsh words, that sense of satisfaction became as hollow and meaningless as everything else. After all those seemingly significant moments they had shared together, after all the guidance and encouragement he had dedicated, Sakuragi still thought of their relationship as worthless and obstructing.  
  
Why did he make the mistake in putting his energy and hope on another human, again? It has already been proven to fail enough times...it was just that the Do'aho seemed so simple-minded in a harmless way, seemingly capable of connecting with him in a way no one else can...but in the end, it all turns out to plain self-delusion. Rukawa knew he gave his emotions away at those severe words, and to salvage his pointless pride, could only hope that the boy was too dense to notice or remember...  
  
A perfunctory knock suddenly cut into his thoughts, and Rena, the hired cleaning lady opened the door.  
  
"Where have you been, Kaede san? It's almost 9 o'clock. Mrs. Rukawa told you she doesn't like you coming in too late, didn't she?" She reminded him.  
  
Rukawa snorted quietly. The old hag was so uptight about following each of his mother's annoying orders. "I told you yesterday, plus a thousand times over the past three years. Practice requires me to stay this late."  
  
"Kaede san, it's not healthy for you to go through such strenuous activity for a long time. I've heard that someone actually died of seizure because he was training too hard..."  
  
"Just leave me alone, Rena. I'm too tired to listen."  
  
The old maid grunted disapprovingly, and closed the bedroom door.  
  
Died of seizure, huh? Frankly, he wouldn't mind dying anytime soon; what to lose except the basketball skills, the excuse for him to carry on his dull life, and will eventually wear away as he aged? By the way, he needed no one's tears, nobody's pity, nothing. He wished that no one would give a damn if he died!  
  
Rukawa got up from his desk and flopped onto his unmade bed. He peered at the clock. 11:30, way past his usual bedtime. He never overslept practice once in his life; however, maybe he should set his alarm this time, just in case.  
  
"...someone must have broken the lock a little after we closed the gym. I checked everywhere, but nothing seems to be missing or out of place. There aren't any signs that someone set foot in, either. How could that be?" Ayako was telling Miyagi.  
  
"Relax, Aya-chan," Miyagi replied comfortingly. "It may just be that the guy wanted to sabotage, but had a sudden change of heart. I'll look for a stronger lock after practice."  
  
8:00 a.m. Amazingly, Rukawa was still the first ones to get to the gym, just a little after the two manageresses and Miyagi, their new appointed captain. He vaguely recalled hearing that worried conversation among them before starting his warm ups...  
  
Sakuragi once again found himself in the school gym, but it was only him. Something just wasn't right, something just felt missing...  
  
A moment later, his teammates flooded in. He greeted them with his usual cheerfulness. "Ha ha ha, I told you the tensai would beat everyone to practice one day!" But they didn't respond, just looked at him blankly.  
  
Huh? Sakuragi looked around. "Why are you people standing there like retards? Where is the fox?"  
  
Miyagi spoke up. "How could you be so oblivious, Hanamichi? Rukawa died from that accident, remember? We all just came back from paying our respects."  
  
"What?" The redhead gaped at him. _Just when did it happen? Why wasn't I told at all?_  
  
"Be sure to stop by the cemetery and visit him when we're done with practice," Mitsui told him as he brushed past.  
  
Practice went on as usual, and for some reason, Sakuragi was playing exceptionally well, making the most beautiful three point shots. Every time he did so, he would turn around and shout, "Heh you see that, Rukawa? The tensai has truly surpassed...", but Rukawa would be nowhere in sight. _Oh, I forgot. He's gone._  
  
Next thing he knew, he was standing in front of Rukawa's grave, which for some reason happens to be placed right in the middle of his mother's and father's. He asked himself, "Why did I come back to this graveyard?? I...I don't want to be within a mile of this place. Someone, something, get me out of here!!"  
  
He woke up with a jolt, sweating and panting. Once again, he heard those accusing words in his head. _Okaasan was dying right before your eyes when you were a kid and you didn't save her. Oyajii was dying right before your eyes when you were old enough to fight and work; yet, you still didn't save him. And now...  
_  
Suddenly, the dauntless sixteen year-old felt the onslaught of that long- gone fear and vulnerability: ten years ago, the very same night when his mother passed away and his father forced to stay in for overnight shift. He encountered the black out and the hurricane alone in his house that night, with the howling wind rattling the windows. Scared and lonely inside the house, yet trapped, because it was too dangerous outside. Just like the tough, fearless exterior the frightened boy was forced to adapt because those malicious kids in class were almost bullying him to death. Eventually the toughness became integrated into his ego, but there were always those dreams to remind him of his true insecure self. Nothing he was able to protect, no where to go, hopeless no matter what he did. Once again, he found his arms around himself, as if trying to shield himself from the rest of the cruel, dark world.  
  
Sakuragi jumped out of bed and darted out of the house like a lunatic, wanting to run away from the house, from his past, from himself. Hot tears were streaming uncontrollably down his cheeks. His eyes were wide with the desperation he felt. _I just can't bear it anymore. I don't want to go through any bit of those goddamn memories, ever! Oh please, make them go away!!_

Then he stopped in his tracks, the desperation in his eyes fading a little. It all started with that vision...and now the horrible dream. If he did something about it, maybe he'd rid some of this harrowing fear...he spun around and started speeding towards the gym with an unshakable intent.  
  
Youhei shifted impatiently in the corner of the gym and stared up at the clock again. _10 a.m. Shit. It's been almost two hours, and Hana still hasn't showed up._ He wanted to go check at Sakuragi's house, but was so anxious about seeing him that he decided to stay put in case his friend changes his mind at the last minute. _I'll bet he's not gonna let me in anyways. He's always the last one to get over a fight_. _At least let me apologize, Hana. It may not be enough for ditching you last night, but I promise I'll somehow make it up to you in the future._  
  
Out of breath but still running, Sakuragi finally reached the school gym. The doors were wide open, and all eyes were still glued on Rukawa, as the boy just made one of his best shots yet. It was the exact scene he saw in the vision.  
  
He yelled at the top of his lungs, "GET AWAY FROM THERE, YOU DUMB FOX!!" and lunged forward. Rukawa only had time to turn around in surprise before the redhead fell on top of him.

Horrified, Youhei sprung to his feet. "HANA, NO!!!" Too late.

A deafening shatter shook the gym. Afterwards, Sakuragi found cheek resting on Rukawa's lower back, felt himself filled with numbness. He opened one eye and saw blood splattered all over. _Shit, I'm too late. Again._ He thought grimly.  
  
Sakuragi then stared in disbelief as Rukawa suddenly started to lift his upper body up. "Huh? You're alive, fox? Hey, say something, dammit!"  
  
He slowly turned to Sakuragi and his narrow eyes suddenly widening twice their size in terrible shock, his pale face whiter than ever before.  
  
"Oi...oi Rukawa, why the hell are you looking at me like I'm a ghost?" he demanded softly. He turned around slowly, and saw a huge chunk of the frame wedged deep into his back. "Huh? What...what happened? It's my...?" The redhead still had a hard time registering.  
  
The numbness started to wear away, replaced by an excruciating pain that surged into every nerve in his body. Amidst his thrashing in the ocean of pain that was driving him to insanity, he vaguely heard screams in the background. Then a strange feeling crept into his awareness; the feeling that he had experienced this tremendous pain before. Suddenly, all the sensations in his body seemed to cease abruptly, and everything went black.  
  
_Oh god._ Youhei sank to his knees and buried his face into his hands. _He was hurting so much that he could hardly gasp for air, let alone scream in pain. Hana, you promised me you wouldn't, you promised yourself too! Why do this to yourself?! Why?!!_ Now he'll never have a chance to tell his friend how sorry he was...

Minutes later, medical help had reached him, and covered his face up.  
  
"...at least his suffering didn't last long..." One of the paramedics remarked.  
  
Rukawa remained in complete shock, even long after they hauled out Sakuragi's body. He did nothing but stare senselessly at the doorway they exited.

TBC?


	3. Paying respects

_I'm sorry if this chapter may turn out to be a long bore for some of you...but it just didn't feel right for me to leave out the details. I'm sure I'll finally be able to get to the good part next chapter, so please bear with me!_  
  
Part 3: Paying Respects  
  
"At 12:10 noon on Saturday in this very gym, Sakuragi Hanamichi, 16 year old student of Shohoku High School and indispensable member of our basketball team, was pronounced gone. But heaven knows that his strength will always be with us as we play." Captain Miyagi Ryota's voice rang loud and firm throughout the gym, but one could tell he almost choked on the word "gone".  
  
As the team listened to the captain's eulogy, those who knew the redhead personally—namely Mitsui, Yasuda, Shiozaki, Kakuta, Kuwata, and Ishii—had their heads bowed down very low to hide their tears.  
  
It had been two days since the incident. Shohoku High's basketball team decided to hold their own private ceremony for Sakuragi, one completely separate from his official funeral.  
  
None of the other schools were to know about this tragedy yet; Shohoku had to salvage whatever decent reputation it had left by suppressing the news of the accident for as long as possible. The police had written it up as a trivial sabotage turned disastrous, possibly done by students jealous of the basketball team's popularity.  
  
The graduated seniors and the coach stood in the corner to witness the team members pay their respects. Anzai sensei's normally jolly face remained grimly solemn throughout the whole team honor ritual, his grief from losing his most mischievous yet promising student evident behind his thick spectacles. By contrast, Akagi Takenori's usual dead serious face was weakened by pain. Out of all the team members they had to help train, only the outrageously childish yet strong-willed Sakuragi was able to draw out a true fatherly instinct from them. Both he and the coach had trouble keeping their cheeks dry. A red-eyed Kogure had vented his tears the previous days, but fresh ones were bound to spill out.  
  
Mitsui shifted his damp eyes around the gym and suddenly interrupted, "Hey, where the hell are Rukawa and our manageresses? Especially Rukawa, the very person Sakuragi gave up his life for!"  
  
Akagi turned to him. "Haruko and Ayako insisted on going with Sakuragi's friend to help out on some other business, but I'm clueless about Rukawa. He'd better not come up with some shitty excuse for missing this honor ritual, or else..."  
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
Unfortunately, Rukawa Kaede would not have a decent excuse, at least not in their eyes. He was crouched down in a small alley, stroking tiny stray kittens with a gentle hand; the tall brunette just needed to be some place where no one could reach him for the time being. Although he still maintained his calm exterior, the rising inner turmoil threatened to break out any minute.  
  
After the raven head finally snapped out of his shock that day, he remembered having to throw up in the toilet several times the following nights. The horror of the moment...and he did nothing but stare at the last agonizing minutes of Sakuragi's life. He knew he was the least squeamish one on the team, yet...the way the redhead expressed his suffering—eyes insanely wild with pain; body convulsing madly; saliva and foam from his mouth; voiceless screams and hyperventilating pants—it traumatized him like nothing else: so real, so painful and sickening to watch, but he could not tear his gaze away...and then the redhead was gone before his eyes. But what's happened has happened, right? No way to reverse it. So, he should go on with his empty, routine life, and put the memories aside...  
  
Rukawa stared at his left palm, stained with Sakuragi's blood from a few days ago. It has dried up and blackened by now. For some reason, he could not bring himself to wash off the crimson substance that covered his hand; it was the very reminder why he's still alive and standing.  
  
He sagged himself against the alley wall, feeling strangely numb, yet simultaneously overwhelmed by so many feelings that left him breathless. Just _how_ is he supposed to feel about the whole thing? Why can't he grieve and let out those emotions? Is it because of that stubborn, stupid pride of his, or...he still couldn't accept the fact that his always-there bickering partner was truly gone forever? And there are too many unanswered questions about the whole incident...  
  
_Why did he save me at his own risk? Why, after claiming that I try to ruin his life? It was just the do'aho's impulse?  
_  
"...Hana's body is going to be shipped out of the hospital, and into the mortuary tomorrow. We should clear out his living room, so they can set the body casket and the funeral altar in there..."  
  
A familiar voice suddenly pierced into Rukawa's pondering mind. He turned his head and saw Sakuragi's friend along with the team's two manageresses. They were headed the opposite direction. _Living room? Are they going to the do'aho's house?_ Rukawa wondered. The boy paused and stared at the threesome with a thoughtful expression. Then he got up and tailed silently after them.  
  
**A while later, in the Sakuragi residence**  
  
Youhei hauled the last piece of furniture out of the living room. "Done, as empty as the first day Hanamichi moved in." He said quietly. "Now there should be enough space to set up the altar and drapes here."  
  
Ayako looked around. "Ano...Mito, aren't some of Sakuragi's relatives supposed to come over and help?"  
  
"They excused themselves from coming due to some last minute urgent business," Youhei responded in a matter-of-factly tone of voice. "All of his relatives are very reluctant about paying for Hana's funeral expenses. They ostracized his father long ago, because he was too honest of a man to play along with their self-serving way of life. No one knows anything about his mother's family, because she left home during her teens."  
  
"That means...Sakuragi kun had been all alone for so many years..." Haruko whispered.  
  
"Yep, Hanamichi was an orphan since he started elementary school, at least that's what he told me."  
  
"Poor Sakuragi kun...having lived and died so unhappily." Haruko sank against the wall and sobbed uncontrollably. "I'm so sorry, it's my fault. If I had inspected the gym a little more closely, maybe..." She started to swoon as she recollected the moment of the accident. _But at least he is free of his loneliness now._  
  
Ayako went to her side and put her arm around the girl's shoulder. "Shhh...no one could have known. If it is your fault, then I'm just to blame as much as you. Don't start fainting again, just breathe deeply, breathe..." she crooned.  
  
Youhei left her in Ayako's care while he wandered into Sakuragi's bedroom. His eyes took in the familiar surroundings; it was messy like any typical boy's room, and way too small for the oversized, hyperactive teenager. Yet, it looked as cozy as can be.  
  
The young brunette suddenly banged his fist against the plaster wall and squeezed his eyes shut. _Damn it! If only I had gone to find Hana...if only I didn't leave him that night!! Maybe I would've changed his mind for real...I'll never have the right to call myself his friend, now..._  
  
Ayako gently interrupted his self-berating. "Mito, I need to head back to the gym; the last part of their ceremony should be starting. Haruko better come with me, too."  
  
"Dai...sniff...Daijoubu, Ayako sempai, you go ahead first. I want to talk to Mito kun a little bit more. Tell oniisan not to worry about me."  
  
"Well...all right. Just don't take too long." She leaned toward Youhei. "I'm sure Sakuragi would appreciate it if you joined us, Mito." She murmured softly.  
  
As the older manageress walked out the house, she failed to spot a tall young man with ebony hair crouching beside the window, listening intently.  
  
"D...don't you think it's rather odd, Mito kun? The police reported the rescue as a mere coincident...but Sakuragi kun rushed in so on time, as if he somehow expected the accident."  
  
Her question rendered Youhei speechless momentarily, as he didn't prepare himself for it. _Should I lie or tell the truth? Oh well, why the hell would it matter? Hanamichi's gone already._  
  
"Actually, whether you believe it or not..."  
  
And Youhei proceeded with the story, both he and Haruko unaware that Rukawa right by the window, listening intently.  
  
"...how uncanny. So, Sakuragi kun still decided to help Rukawa kun, even with you actively trying to dissuade him?"  
  
Youhei shifted his eyes down in slight discomfort. "Try to understand, I hardly know Rukawa, and Hanamichi is a really close friend."  
  
"It's all right. At least...Sakuragi kun succeeded in saving Rukawa kun's life. And hopefully, Rukawa kun will be out of danger now. I just wish there's some way to tell him how grateful Rukawa kun and I feel..." she murmured wistfully.  
  
_You rather Hana died instead of Rukawa, huh? Well, FYI, Hana had a lot to look forward to in life, too! Your thankfulness to him for saving your damn crush won't do him shit! _He ranted bitterly in his head. She's biased towards Rukawa the same way he was for Sakuragi, except her reasons are still too shallow for him to accept. After all the effort, Sakuragi's sincere affections still weren't enough to capture even half of her heart.  
  
"I need to leave now. Are you going to stay here, Mito kun?"  
  
Youhei breathed deeply. "No. There's nothing left to do here, at least for today. I might as well join you." He told her as he followed her out the door. Suddenly he paused. "Don't tell anyone else of this incident, okay? It'll just make them more distressed than they already are. And no need to tell Rukawa, either." _Even if he cares one bit, I'm betting he'll be the last person to attempt help._  
  
"Don't worry, Mito-kun, the secret is safe with me." She promised, and they made their way to the Shohoku gym.  
  
When the two were out of sight, Rukawa emerged from his hiding place.

_A foretelling vision? A fortune teller who hates my family? The do'aho's very own choice...to risk his life for mine...? _It was too incredulous for him to grasp for the moment.  
  
The raven head fumbled with the back door latch and slipped in. He felt a little uneasy about intruding, but he _did_ want to pay Sakuragi a visit...in his own way. The redhead's abode was incomparably smaller and run-down than his own.  
  
So...the redhead and his friend encountered a mystical being, who supposedly hates his family. He hardly even bothered to meet half of his family members, let alone their history. And people who believed in that supernatural crap made him sneer inwardly. But that Akagi girl had a point, it did not seem like a mere coincidence...  
  
_But so what? And if that crap is really true, something else'll happen to me, and I'd probably be meeting that do'aho soon, anyways._ Not that he was worried about it, of course.  
  
Rukawa surveyed the bedroom. Unused textbooks were tossed everywhere. The redhead had pasted the secretly shot photos of his 51 rejections all over the wall. On his bed was a small, worn-out kiddy blanket with cute black kittens and teddy bears printed all over them. Casually picking it up, the brunette found himself gazing at the object with softened eyes. _Despite his fearlessness of pain, shame, and challenges, a do'aho will always be a do'aho; needing someone to look after him lest he makes dumb mistakes...but no one was there to when he made the biggest mistake of taking his own life..._  
  
His eye then caught the photo of their Sannoh victory taped right above his bed; Sakuragi had circled himself with a red marker, and wrote on top, "Due to the tensai's effort". Unknowingly, Rukawa reached out and rested his fingertips on the image of the squatting redhead. _Yes, it was your effort, do'aho. Without that last basket..._  
  
"Ha ha ha, you have to admit now, stupid fox, don't you?" The raven head's ears perked up and his eyes grew wide. "You and our fellow teammates are all too dependent on the TENSAI! Whatcha guys gonna do without me now, huh?" A haughty voice rasped itself into his attention.  
  
Startled, Rukawa spun around. "Do'aho, you...!" The room was empty.  
  
Sweating slightly, Rukawa cursed aloud...at himself. _Was it just my imagination? Oh shit, now I'm getting auditory hallucinations!_ Or maybe...because Sakuragi made his presence so known all the time, it was too unsettling for his mind not to hear him.  
  
Basketball practice took on an entirely different meaning when that irritating loudmouth jumped in the team. Will he ever get used to not hearing his childish taunts, his triumphant laughs, not feeling that firm fist across his face? Maybe not...  
  
It was the redhead's own choice, Sakuragi's best friend said.  
  
_That means he CHOSE to die for you. For YOU, Kaede._ As those words echoed in his head, a feeling swelled inside of him that almost resembled...warmth?  
  
He let out a loud grunt and slammed his forehead against the wall, as he'd seen the redhead do so many times. Unfortunately, his skull wasn't as thick as Sakuragi's, and a throbbing pain shot throughout his head a second later. _Dammit. When did I ever become so pathetic?! Ever since I met the do'aho...it's all his fault!_ He closed his eyes and pressed his forehead deeper against the wall.  
  
"I freaking hate you...and you'd better believe me. Why couldn't you have minded your own damn business? Why put me through this...?" he murmured out loud. _Your stupid sacrifice is meaningless to me...I'd rather you—_  
  
_Riiingg, riiingg..._the loud clanging of a nearby phone snapped him back to reality. Rukawa was in a bad enough disposition as is, and that sudden disturbance just did it. Glaring, the raven head stormed across the room to snap the phone cord in two, when the answering machine went on...  
  
"Hello, to whom we may be speaking, this is Narita of the Kanagawa district police. We feel it is now necessary to inform the Sakuragi household that the body of Sakuragi Hanamichi is formally to be reported missing after two days of intense search. Allow me to apologize for declining to reveal this news until completely certain it was lost. So far, there no leads, no any clue of possible theft motives. Thus, it may be necessary to delay any funeral preparations, until..."  
  
That made the raven head stop dead in his tracks. _Sakuragi's body...missing? Two days ago, when the accident had just occurred? Who could've...?_  
  
Without thinking any further, Rukawa sped to the gym, seeking Youhei, the only one who may provide him with a better explanation.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
In what seemed to be utter emptiness, a conscious human thought stirred. _W..what happened? Where am I? What am I? Wait, I remember...that crashing sound...big pool of blood...that appalled fox face...the horrendous pain that followed...those screams... then...because I was trying to..._  
  
A woman's voice suddenly penetrated his awareness.  
  
"...you see? Asking me to do so just ruined your own plot. Be glad that I perceived the outcome; I went through all that trouble to disguise myself as a paramedic staff and preserve his being just before the last breath, and sneak it back here."  
  
Huh? That voice sounds familiar...it's that weird woman's voice. The weird lady with the black curtain draped around her.  
  
"Shit. What the hell are we gonna do with him now?"  
  
A man's voice popped up, He never heard of that voice in his life, but at the same time he strangely felt that he had known it forever. He can hear just fine, but...why can't he see anything? Why can't he _feel_ anything?!  
  
"...keep him as he is, I guess. He didn't have a role in your purpose against Rukawa Kaede to start with and never will now..."  
  
"You mean just leave him like that forever?!"  
  
"For now, yes. Since your pointless request caused his death...we are additionally forced to take full responsibility of him."  
  
"What the hell do you understand?! I have my own good reasons for doing what I did, so just stay out of it!" the man snapped irritably.  
  
"...you'd better tone down that attitude; I've been assisting you faithfully all the way. And besides, it's all up to you to decide how to dispose of him after the matters between you and Rukawa are concluded..."  
  
"Believe me; I will succeed in manipulating our destiny...no matter the cost...and even if the whole damn world decides to turn against me again. I'll fight against fate with my own hands, until it goes my way..." the man's tone was full of deadly determination.  
  
_What the hell's going on? Just where am I??! Goddamn it, someone answer me!!_ He cried hysterically yet soundlessly, in the desperate attempt to make himself heard amidst the nothingness he may very well be part of.  
  
TBC  
  
_No one has to tell me, this is a pretty sucky chapter; and sorry if you guys feel you've wasted time reading it. It's my first fiction after all...but it'll get more interesting in the following chapters, I promise!_


	4. Confinement

_I've finally got the basic plot planned out for the following chapters; hopefully it won't seem too far-fetched or unoriginal! Please R&R for this chapter...  
_  
Part 4: Confinement  
  
3:00 PM in the Shohoku High gym:  
  
The ceremony had just ended, and only four people remained to help clean up, Mitsui Miyagi, Ayako and Youhei. Akagi, Haruko, and the rest of the team left earlier.  
  
"...as I've told you, we tried contacting Rukawa in every damn way we could, but he's no where to be found! It's not our fault!" Miyagi snapped exasperatingly.  
  
Youhei snorted. "All that kid does is eat, play ball, and sleep. Just how freaking hard could it be to find him?!"  
  
"Shouldn't be too hard..." Ayako answered. "In fact, he's right there!"  
  
And indeed, there was the object of their argument standing at the gym doorway. He was out of breath, his eyes searching left and right, until they fixed themselves upon Youhei. Rukawa approached him in large strides.  
  
"You...!" Youhei thrust out his arm to point a menacing finger, but the taller brunette unexpectedly grabbed it and started pulling the surprised boy roughly alongside him  
  
"Rukawa, what the hell's going on?! You'd better have a damn good excuse..." Miyagi started furiously.  
  
Without pausing his sprint, he replied curtly "Emergency. Can't talk right now."  
  
"What emergency?! Hey, hold up...!" But the raven head had sped off, dragging poor Youhei forcefully out with him.  
  
Five minutes passed before the protesting Youhei finally managed to twist his aching arm out of Rukawa's grip. He snatched the taller boy's collar and shoved him against a fence.  
  
"Well, Mr. Most-Honored-Guest Rukawa, first you entirely missed my best friend's ceremony, and then you've the nerve to show up suddenly and drag me here without explanation...may I have the honor of asking _what the hell's up with you?!_" Youhei hissed dangerously through clenched teeth.  
  
Rukawa stared straight back at him, unperturbed. "I followed you to your best friend's house to pay him a visit," he said in his usual toneless voice, "and was informed by the police that Sakuragi's body had been missing the day they brought him to the hospital."  
  
Youhei froze for a moment before letting go; he took a few steps back, disbelief replacing his anger. "What...when..."  
  
"Just who was that woman you saw the other day?" Rukawa demanded. Youhei didn't answer. "Hey..." the tall raven head made a grab for his arm again.  
  
"If anyone knows, it should be you, Rukawa." Youhei replied quietly, without facing him. "She mentioned that she had a grudge against your family."

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Two silent sophomore brunettes sat across from each other on the subway train. The destination residence turned out to be a few stops from the Kanagawa main station. Rukawa asked his mother if there was history of animosity against her or their family; surprised and angered, she abruptly ordered him not to mention such nonsense again. Thus, he contacted his estranged father, her ex-husband, carefully concealing the purpose of his inquiry. His father was reluctant to spill anything at first, but finally relented to the boy's persistence.  
  
That woman was most likely a distant relative: Aimi, the daughter of his mother's cousin Kimura Maya; her photo matched the description Youhei had given him. Twenty years ago, his mother and her cousin apparently had a bitter fight about inheritance matters. Their grandfather gladly sided with Rukawa's mother in the end, because Kimura stubbornly married a rumored psychic freak against his wishes. Enraged, Kimura Maya disowned herself from the family and ran off, along with husband and daughter Aimi. Rukawa's father obtained their current address only because one of his acquaintances happens to be her neighbor.  
  
Youhei ran his fingers through his black hair. _Why are we doing this? Even if this Kimura Aimi really is the culprit, god knows where she put...or what she'd done to Hana's body...are we supposed to try forcing out a confession or something? Most likely to get nothing but harassment charges. Oh well, it's worth trying to find out than having it bug me for the rest of my life._ He eyed the taller boy curiously, who wore his usual unreadable façade. _Guess I shouldn't think so badly of him now...he is trying to help, after all.  
_  
They finally reached their destination: an ordinary-looking condo in a suburban district. Youhei took a deep breath, and knocked.  
  
The door opened promptly. There stood the same young woman a few days before, except she was dressed in casual clothes. She gave them a greeting smile. "Good afternoon; I was expecting you two. Please, come in..."  
  
Youhei stood there, too dumbfounded to move, until Rukawa brushed right past him. She led them to the living room and offered them a seat.  
  
"As Rukawa Kaede may have told you, my name is Kimura Aimi. My parents have moved overseas and left this abode to me, so no worry about them barging in...."  
  
Youhei lurched forward. "Ms. Kimura, do you have any clue where Sakuragi Hanamichi's body had gone?" he cut her off impatiently.  
  
She took a drink from her tea. "Yes; I know exactly where it is. Don't worry, I've taken great care to preserve it...we still need it for something."  
  
"'We'?" the silent raven head finally spoke up.  
  
"Me and the man who planned all this out. I'm just acting as his assistance." She replied. "Unfortunately, I cannot give away his true identity."  
  
"I don't care what the hell you or your damn accomplice is up to...just be so kind as to return my best friend's body!" Youhei tried to stand up, but was held forcefully down by Rukawa. "Hey...!"  
  
The taller brunette leaned closer to the woman, eyes glinting with solid menace. "Who is this other man?" He demanded quietly.  
  
Kimura gazed back at him calmly, completely unintimidated. "Are you still concerned about your life, Rukawa? Well I can tell you this much; this man, who calls himself 'Aka (crimson)' may have a change of strategy in dealing with you, in which he no longer plans hurt you physically. Don't worry about trying to find him; he'd come looking for you."  
  
"So...'Aka' is behind all of this, huh? What is he, a deity so strong that he has the power and authority to control _my_ fate?"  
  
The young woman smiled. "No, Rukawa...he's just an ordinary human being like you...but given the circumstances he'd been under, he has more right to determine your future than you yourself. And in fact, the two of you may find him to be very familiar...if he ever chooses to reveal himself."  
  
"Okay, aside all this crap we've been wasting time on, let's get to the main point: you'd better give back Hanamichi right this damn moment, or else...or else..."  
  
"Or else what?" The woman challenged calmly. "You don't know where I've secured him. If you report me to the police, I'll just deny that I had anything to do with the theft. Try and do anything stupid to me now, and one of those plenty passerby's outside will dial for the police immediately; as you may notice, this house has an abundance of large windows." She smirked as Youhei tensed with anger, standing there helplessly.  
  
"...or else I'll take your parents' dirty secrets to the police. My father told me all about it, and secretly kept all the evidence they left in our house." Rukawa finished off Youhei's sentence. Kimura spun around abruptly and narrowed her eyes.  
  
"Having been a private detective, father knows of all the illegal activities your parents had done a while ago; he just chose not to reveal it, feeling your family had been bad off enough as was."  
  
"....."  
  
For a moment, his distant cousin bore her eyes intensely into his stony ones, pondering on what her choice should be.  
  
"Good move, Rukawa Kaede. I never expected someone with the likes of you is capable of using such tactics...and I guess dealing with the police on a losing case isn't worth the effort." She sighed, giving in. "This is going to troublesome...instead of returning the body right away, how about we negotiate something else?"  
  
"No way in hell...:" Youhei started heatedly.  
  
Kimura held her hand up. "Not so fast. If I show you where Sakuragi is right now, you may change your mind."  
  
She walked to a large scroll on the wall, and pushed it aside to reveal a hidden corridor leading downstairs. "Come on."  
  
The passage led down to a dark empty room—all dark except for a huge glass tank-like chamber in the very back of the room, emitting a delicate, unearthly glow. Encased in it is a tall and completely naked male figure...with short red hair. Even from the distance they were standing, it was clear the figure was no other than Sakuragi Hanamichi.  
  
As he walked closer to get a better look at the enclosed figure, Rukawa unconsciously caught his breath. Sakuragi Hanamichi's eyes were gently closed and his face peacefully relaxed, as if finally immune from worldly troubles. No hint of that contorting pain remained on the redhead's features. His naked body was crucified into a rigidly straight standing position by some invisible binding, yet the boy's fiery hair was drifting and dancing slowly about his head as if submerged under water. The strange mellow radiance served to enhance the beautiful details of his virile body and contrasting his youthfully innocent face.  
  
As his eyes traced the details of the body, the tall brunette became vaguely aware of a strange, prickling warmth creeping under his skin: through his cheeks, the back of his neck, through his chest, reaching further and further down under his navel...then he felt a dim tightness in a certain spot, much like...  
  
_Stop_. Rukawa squeezed his eyes shut and dug his nails painfully into his palms. _Don't be messing with me, not in a time like this!_ He told himself. The brunette did not consciously know where that sensation came from, and didn't want to find out, either...not for now.  
  
As the boys wandered to the side of the tank, they noted that the fatal gash was present on the redhead's back, cleaned of all the blood.  
  
Youhei continued to stare with wonder. "Hana...it's really him...?" was all he could murmur.  
  
Kimura stood by, observing the two with amusement. "Just before his life slipped away entirely, I secured Sakuragi's body in that chamber, a timeless dimension where it'll forever remain in its present state; thus, his soul hangs between life and death. It still retains his consciousness, present memories, emotions, personality."  
  
She took out a strange charm attached to a chain and handed it to Youhei. "Your friend will gain the ability to see and hear living things, if you lend him your energy through this amulet. Likewise, you'll be able to see and hear him. Now I'll release the confinement curse, so he can stray from his body..."  
  
Kimura closed her eyes and murmured inaudibly. A strange glowing mist spiralled in front of the tank, slowly taking shape of a tall young man...and there was Sakuragi Hanamichi, with his head slightly bent down, and vacuous look on his face. He wore the same clothes as the day of the accident.  
  
"Hana...do you hear me? Hana!" Youhei called out, tentatively approaching him.  
  
Sakuragi jolted out of his trance, and blinked a few times, the light coming back to his eyes. As he focused them on his best friend, recognition surfaced on his face.  
  
"You're...Youhei." He whispered.  
  
"You really are Sakuragi Hanamichi...? Not some hoax or illusion?"  
  
The redhead scowled. "Hey, whadya mean by that, Youhei! You dare mock the genuineness of the one and only powerful tensai in the world?! I'm gonna...!" Yup, it's him all right; his personality is too unique...Youhei breathed out in relief.  
  
He then threw himself onto his knees. "I'm so sorry...Hana, for ditching you like that; if you want to disqualify me as your friend, I'll totally understand..." hearing the grief and remorse laden in his friend's voice, Sakuragi stopped his rant abruptly. "I just...please just forgive me!"  
  
"Youhei...Youhei, stop it!" Sakuragi couldn't bear seeing his best friend so distressed. "I know I've told you to bow down to the tensai, but not this way! Come on, get up and...!" He tried grabbing Youhei's shoulder to pull him to his feet, but his hand passed right through the brunette's body.  
  
Sakuragi's eyes widened in shock and withdrew from the boy. He blankly stared down at his own palms. It was then he noticed they weren't entirely opaque, like a normal human being's; the tiled floor was vaguely visible through them.  
  
"Hana..." Youhei started in concern.  
  
"I...I _am_ dead, aren't I..." Sakuragi muttered, gloominess lacing his voice. "When we started talking, I thought the whole thing might've just been a long nightmare. But...why can you see me? You never told the tensai about your psychic abilities."  
  
"No, that's not..."  
  
"Where are we, anyways...?" He looked around curiously...and saw himself in the tank.  
  
"...?! Hey! Why is there another me in there..._without clothes on_?!" He demanded.  
  
"Oh, that's because..."  
  
The redhead then turned and caught sight of Kimura. "Hey...it's that weird lady again..." Then mortified horror crossed his features. "...wait a minute, I'm standing nude in front of a _girl_?!!" He awkwardly attempted to block her view of the body. "Youhei, you bastard of a traitor! How could you not have done anything?!!"  
  
Youhei sweatdropped, but at the same time, his heart was rejoicing. _Hana will always be Hana, dead or alive._ "It's futile, Hanamichi; she can't hear or see your soul without this amulet...and don't worry, I think she's unaffected by men." Then his expression became serious. "Now listen; you're wondering what's going on, right...?" Youhei explained the whole situation to the flustered redhead.  
  
"...trapped me here?" Sakuragi repeated in disbelief.  
  
An idea passed through Youhei's mind. _I could smash the tank, retrieve Sakuragi's body with Rukawa, and get the hell out of here...or even call the police. But if I do so, will I ever be able to talk to him again? I don't really want to risk it..._  
  
As if she had read his thoughts, the woman spoke up. "If you want your friend back right now, you can go ahead and break open the chamber. But his body will start dying, and his soul will immediately be transferred for reincarnation; all his conscious memories and personality built in this life would then dissolve in the process, and the Sakuragi Hanamichi you know will be gone forever."  
  
"..." The brunette was speechless for a minute or so, from doubt or indecision he didn't know. He then leaned very close to his friend and whispered, "Look here, Hanamichi. I'm gonna leave you as you are right now, and see if there's some way to bring you back."  
  
The redhead frowned. "Do you actually think it's possible to?"  
  
"I never did...until that Kimura woman exposed her supernatural abilities to me. As she said, you're not _completely_ dead yet, and if she's able to do all this uncanny stuff, there just might be a possibility. I don't know what she has up her sleeve for you, but I doubt she can make you any worse off than you are now."  
  
"Youhei, I..." he started somewhat reluctantly.  
  
"I need to talk to him, too." A familiar emotionless voice rang out in the darkness, suddenly interrupted their conversation.  
  
Sakuragi grimaced. "Don't tell me..._Rukawa's_ here, too?! Why in hell did you invite him into this?!"  
  
The tall raven head stepped into the dim light, making his serious features visible. "Hand over the amulet when you're done." He requested firmly. Youhei glanced at him curiously. _What could he possibly want to say to Hanamichi? Thanks for saving his life? No way, that's just not Rukawa..._  
  
"After all I've given up because of him, why can't he let me be?! Tell that fox he's the last person I wanna see now!"  
  
Youhei sighed deeply. "Hana...he was the one who led us to you; without him, I doubt I'd ever get here. I kinda owe it to him, so could you just try to listen to what he has to say..."  
  
Sakuragi glared at his friend. "Other than taunting me and making things worse, what else can he do?" He then looked away. "You were right all along Youhei. I had no idea what I'd be getting myself into...and I did nothing but treat you, the only person who really cares, like shit..." the redhead mumbled.  
  
"Hana...that's not true! You are still my best friend! If you really were treating me like shit...I'd never come here in the first place. If anything, I'm just as bad as you are, for abandoning you when you needed someone..."  
  
The two friends sat wordlessly for a minute or two, not knowing what to say to each other. Then Sakuragi broke the silence.  
  
"...bring that fox in, I guess, and let me get it over with."  
  
Youhei drew in a deep breath. "Be good and wait for me okay, old buddy?" He put on a goofy smile to hide his worry and reluctance to leave.  
  
"Promise you'll come visit again?" Sakuragi asked quietly.  
  
"Never dare to break a promise to a tensai!" They both shared a brief chuckle.  
  
Just when Youhei was about to walk off, the redhead called out. "Youhei...you're any tensai's one and only best friend in the whole world...and you'd better take my word for it."  
  
The brunette looked back and saw on his best friend's face an utterly sincere expression; he quickly turned away again, lest the redhead sees the tears forming in his eyes. "Thanks, Hana...I definitely will." He tossed the amulet into Rukawa's hand as he passed by him.  
  
Rukawa focused his placid eyes onto Sakuragi; the redhead stared back with comparable impassiveness. "You actually went out of your way to visit me, Rukawa? If you're here to express your gratitude, there's no need. It was my own damn choice." The raven head didn't reply. For a few minutes, neither spoke.  
  
"......"  
  
"......"  
  
"What the hell do you want, fox?!" the redhead finally growled impatiently. "Spit out whatever you've got to say, and get the hell out of my face!"  
  
"...so you really are dead, do'aho." Rukawa mused out loud, more to himself than Sakuragi.  
  
"You came all the way here just to say that, huh, you miserable fox? I didn't expect anything less sardonic from you."  
  
The raven head was momentarily silent again. Then, "Why did you give up your own life for me?" He demanded tonelessly.  
  
_Crap...just the question I don't know how to answer._ "No reason." The redhead replied sullenly.  
  
"Answer the damn question. Why?"  
  
"Geez, I said I don't know! Okay, I did it because I'm a very soft hearted person, and forgot at that moment that you're too much of a selfish loser to even bother with! It was one of those rare big mistakes that a genius makes! Satisfied?!"  
  
"It _was_ a big mistake, you're right about that. I never needed you to pry into my life." Rukawa agreed rather bluntly.  
  
Sakuragi's eyes blazed dangerously with loathing at his words. "You disgusting son of a bitch!!" he snarled, and lunged at the raven head. Remembering too late that he's not able to touch earthly matter, and falling through Rukawa's body face down.  
  
"You are downright _repulsive_, you know that?!! After what I lost helping you, you can't even display a shred of gratefulness ..."  
  
"I'm being realistic, do'aho. And just what can I do to repay you? List your demands, though I doubt I'll have the ability to fulfill even half of them..."  
  
"Just one very simple demand, fox," Sakuragi hissed through his gritted teeth. "Never. Ever. Let me see you again."  
  
For a minute or so, Rukawa stared at the redhead with an unreadable expression before replying, "Easily done, if that satisfies my obligation to you." Then he turned to walk away.  
  
_I knew that fox'll make things ten times worse than they already are...oh shit, I forgot to ask Youhei_... "Wait, Rukawa..." The raven head paused. "If you really want to do me a favor...then ask Haruko chan to visit me."  
  
An unexpected feeling of disgust washed over the tall brunette. Now he's turning to _her _for comfort? Just how pathetically disillusioned can this do'aho get?!  
  
"To be honest, she doesn't give a shit about you." Now why did he even bother to say that? Much less trouble if he'd just comply...  
  
"WHAT DID YOU SAY?!!" Sakuragi's fists trembled with anger as the raven head faded from his view. "You're a disease, Rukawa...mocking me like this cause I can't be there to protect her from your malicious abuse! Never mind, just stay out of my sight, and I'd be forever too damn grateful!!" 

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Kimura saw the two boys to the doorway of her home. "So we've agreed...you may come by anytime either of you want to meet with Sakuragi's soul, until we figure out what to do with him. I'll keep a spare key hidden out here, in case I'm at work..."  
  
"Not that I expect you to tell me, Ms. Kimura...but just what exactly _are_ you?"  
  
She chuckled. "Just an ordinary human, too...given supernatural powers to bring justice to those who deserve it."  
  
"Bring justice, huh?" Youhei suppressed a derogatory laugh. _Yeah, I'll believe that when she somehow brings Hana back to life._  
  
As the two brunettes walked back to the train station, "Rukawa...where's the amulet?"  
  
The taller boy didn't turn to face him. "Hidden under the doormat, along with the spare key."  
  
"I'll take it with me to research on the next time I pay Hana a visit...and see if I can find anything interesting." Youhei then glanced curiously at the silent raven head. _I wondered what he and Hana talked about...it couldn't have been pleasant._

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

After Youhei and Rukawa had left, Sakuragi found himself back inside the black emptiness. _I'm...dead. I really am gone. Never thought it'll ever come, not even when I hurt my back in the Sannoh game...or when those big kids were beating me with a bat during grade school. Hey, take it like the brave tensai you are!_ He scolded himself. _But...that means no more slacking off with the Sakuragi gundan, no more tensai songs, no more seeing Haruko or the team, no more...basketball. Despite all I've lost, maybe I could've met up with Okasan and Oyajii; I miss them so much. But now that weird bitch is somehow trapping me here. And to make things worse, that freaking fox found a way to talk to me, out of all people. Hmph. There's gotta be a way out of here, and I'm gonna find it for sure. I'll break free from this joint, just you wait! Then you'll be sorry..._ He'd been struggling during the past few days to find a way out, but with no avail.  
  
_I hope Youhei finds some way to bring me back to life; but even if he does, what if everyone thinks I'm a zombie?! Especially if Haruko chan...! And I so want to see Okasan and Oyajii again._ The redhead thought, feeling completely torn. Shit...and it's so damn lonely here all by himself. Don't know if his strong, hyperactive self will last long in this state without going insane. _God...if anything, just grant me three TINY wishes; have a close and trustworthy companion visit me soon _(no other than Youhei, he thought), _convey my sincere feelings to a true love_ (Haruko of course, he had in mind), _and...let me slug that bastard Rukawa one last time for all the trouble he'd caused for me...then I promise I'll never, ever demand a favor from you again!!_  
  
Suddenly, a flash of blinding light appeared before Sakuragi, and the emptiness melted...not to reveal the same dark room, but a beautiful, well lit apartment. _Huh? I've never been to such a nice place in my whole life. Where am I?_ Then he heard someone sigh loudly; turning around, he saw a young man with dark hair sprawled on the couch. _He's...Rukawa?! Hey fox, what are YOU doing in such a fancy apartment?! Did you bring me here just to show off...!_ The boy didn't respond, and as Sakuragi got closer, he realized that the raven head stared right through him. _He can't see or hear me...? But just a while ago..._  
  
He decided to try again. _Hey, Rukawa_...then noticed the undisguised loneliness on the raven head's normally stony expression. _Huh? That cold- hearted fox never looked sad before...  
_  
The apartment door suddenly swung open, and in came...a blurred figure. Rukawa immediately sprang to his feet, irrepressible joy suddenly taking over his features, all traces of gloominess gone. He rushed forward and wrapped his arms tightly around whoever that was. "I miss you so much..." he murmured softly, eyes closed contently, nuzzling into its shoulder. 

_Now I really know something's wrong...that fox will never, ever look excited and happy, even if he's championed the best basketball player in the whole universe._  
  
"....." The figure said something, but its voice was so hazy as well Sakuragi couldn't even tell whether it was a male or female.  
  
Rukawa looked up and frowned openly. "So what if it was just a week? It felt like a damn decade!"  
  
The unknown person emitted a loud hazy laugh. Still frowning, Rukawa dragged the figure to the couch. He pushed him into a lying position on the couch, causing the figure to gasp loudly. The brunette then crept on top of it.  
  
"You're suffering's not over yet, ." The tall brunette rasped, a hint of hunger in his voice. The last word of Rukawa's sentence was strangely tuned out. "I'm going to have you taste the torture you've made me experience this whole week."  
  
The unknown person chuckled fondly. ".....?"  
  
An immense desire of some sort had mixed itself into Rukawa's elated expression, then...a nasty smile slowly formed at the corner of his lips. "No way...I'll be awake the whole night, just you watch." He lowered his head and brushed his lips against the other one's with the utmost gentleness...then all of the sudden started ravaging its mouth with wild passion, violently pressing down harder and deeper...  
  
The redhead suddenly felt an unknown bashfulness creep through him at the sight of the make out. He'd never seen affection displayed _that_ intensely before! _Just what could make that feelingless fox act so uncharacteristically lovey-dovey?! Whoever that is, she must be an unimaginably beautiful chick...seeing how he ignores even the prettiest girls in our school. Shit! He always gets all the things no one else can! Just his damn luck..._ Suddenly, the whole scene disappeared as quickly as it came, returning the redhead back to oblivion. _While I'm stuck here as miserable as hell, HE continues to enjoy his undeservedly happy life..._

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
**Meanwhile, in the Kanagawa district park...**  
  
All by himself in the park basketball court, Rukawa dribbled the ball, jumped to do a flawless lay up...and missed, for the fourth time. He slumped to the ground, letting the ball roll away by itself. _So what's wrong now, dammit? You got your questions answered...and the best thing to do for that do'aho is to leave him alone, right?_ The brunette snapped open his can of pocari sweat and took a long, thirsty drink. _Just as I thought, making the trip to that woman's house is just as meaningless._  
  
Inviting that Akagi Haruko to Kimura's house...if anything, she's most likely to cause a commotion, which will leave Sakuragi's friend upset and angry. And as much as he doesn't want to give a damn about that idiot...he's doing him a true favor by _not_ telling her.  
  
So that's it, huh? Everything settled...not. He's missed more than one easy shot in a series of thirty. His normal 11 hour sleeping time shrunk down to a meager 6, leaving him to cope through the day like a zombie. His appetite has decreased by almost a half, hardly enough to sustain himself for practice. And his once-unbreakable self-control was failing him...and he can no longer push that fact into the back of his head; all because of...  
  
Rukawa pulled out and gazed at a shiny object from under his shirt...it was the amulet. He had lied to Sakuragi's friend that day about placing it with the key as he'd kept it around his neck the whole time. For some odd reason, he just...couldn't let it go, couldn't let someone else hold it...  
  
_Screw it then; I'm just becoming more and more pathetic, anyways. I'll go against my dignity this once and find a way out of this confusing mess._ The raven head picked himself up and started heading down the road that led to the train station.  
  
TBC 


	5. Past Bitterness

_Someone please warn me if the characters are starting to sound OOC; I have a bad feeling about it. _  
  
Part 5: Past Bitterness  
  
_Come out...you've been summoned._ A voiceless command stirred in Sakuragi's consciousness. Huh? What was that? Once again, the blackness fell away like a curtain, and he found himself in that same room he was imprisoned in.  
  
"What am I doing here, again...?" he wondered, and saw a dark outline of a boy standing in front of him. _Youhei? Has he come back to visit me after all? So heaven DID hear my wishes!  
_  
"Hey, Youhei buddy! Boy, am I glad you made it back here so soon! What's up? " The redhead greeted cheerily.  
  
The figure stayed silent. Then he slowly made his way toward the dim light.  
  
"...? Come on man, stop freaking me out! You know, you're acting so much like..." _Huh? You must be kidding...is it really...!  
_  
"Rukawa?!"  
  
"Do'aho..." The raven head greeted simply.  
  
"Hey, just a second, fox! Are you deaf or forgetful beyond help?! I remember we agreed not too long ago that you'll never show up in my damn face again!!"  
  
Rukawa shot a coldly defiant glare at him. "And I remember that you just as much owe me a proper explanation..."  
  
"What..." Sakuragi paused in a moment of confusion before resuming to his state of fury. "What explanation, you freaking liar?!"  
  
"I just remembered a moment ago...because I realized you didn't fully explain that question about interfering with my fate."  
  
"I told you...!!"  
  
"You were lying."  
  
"Huh?"  
  
Rukawa leaned closer to the redhead, the look in his eyes hardening like steel. They seemed to be penetrating through Sakuragi's very own, almost as if trying to scrutinize his mind. Sakuragi took a step back, feeling peculiarly intimidated by that expression. He had to fight the urge to avert his eyes, lest he appear vulnerable before his enemy. Why the hell am I shrinking away?! It's only that stupid fox, for god's sake!!  
  
"...there's more to it. Everything that goes through your impossibly simple mind shows right on your face."  
  
"Look Rukawa, just freaking stay away from me, okay?! You're making me goddamn sick!!"  
  
"After you tell me the goddamn truth."  
  
Sakuragi suddenly looked down. "Rukawa...just leave me alone." He said, anger suddenly fading from his voice.  
  
"Unless I get a good answer, then hell no." The raven head replied with rigid coldness.  
  
The redhead took a long, deep breath, feeling turmoil build up within him...not from his anger toward Rukawa, but something else. "All right, you freaking bastard...if that's what it takes to get you out of here. The reason I made that stupid sacrifice was because..." His steady voice was trembling, intense emotions threatening to spill out. "...because my oyajii was dying right before my eyes, and I didn't save him. I...just let him die like that!" He gasped out painfully, as if confessing his unbearable guilt to himself.  
  
Unable to stop the tears flowing down his cheeks, Sakuragi quickly turned away. Not aware that the other boy's eyes were no longer cold and hard, nor emotionless...  
  
"I...and maybe that's why...I never want to witness anyone dying ever again, especially if I could've done something...it reminds me so much of the pain!" He coughed out, desperately trying to choke back his sobs. The redhead forgot about Rukawa's existence for one moment, lost in his own self- realization. So that's the whole truth...he never dug for the answer, until the raven head forced him to. All those years of suppressed grief finally released...overtly gushing through the redhead's eyes. "That's the goddamn truth for you, fox! Can you leave now?!!" he yelled, openly crying.  
  
Rukawa, surprisingly taken aback, felt his guarded composure crumbling; those eyes almost seemed to contain all the sadness in the world. The brunette suddenly felt something shattering that impenetrable barrier he built around himself for so many years, felt a piercing jab inside his heart. It was unbearably painful and unfamiliar...completely different from the depressing emptiness. For that moment, Rukawa felt he'd give up anything in the world just so he can lay a comforting hand on the redhead...but instead, he stood there and waited for Sakuragi to calm down.  
  
Neither of them spoke for a while after the redhead finally stopped. Then, "I'm...sorry for making you feel like this." Rukawa's voice was almost down to a whisper. He started to leave quietly.  
  
Still overwhelmed and sniffling, Sakuragi jerked his head up. The boy's tone sounded so different, somewhat unsettling to him...he actually sounded guilty...and sincere?  
  
"Wait." He called. The raven head paused.  
  
"Why...did you want to know so badly, fox?"  
  
Rukawa was speechless for a moment, the tables having turned on him. He couldn't just say "I don't know" at this point, however true it was.  
  
"Because it...kept on bothering me."  
  
"Why was it bothering you?" Sakuragi pressed, not knowing why.  
  
"........" _All I know is...no matter how much I refuse to believe so, it almost felt like I was the one who killed him..._  
  
"Perhaps it's because he actually feels somewhat guilty...and he should be, lying to me about the hidden amulet." Youhei's voice interrupted his thoughts. The boy had just entered the room, with Kimura accompanying him. "Good thing Ms. Kimura had an extra one, so I won't have to wrench it from him."  
  
Slightly chagrined, Rukawa spun around and glanced icily at Sakuragi's friend.

_Ha, sometimes the thoughts of the so-called ice king aren't too hard to de- mystify after all._ He thought as the silent basketball player ignored his smug expression. Then he caught sight of his red-eyed best friend. "Hanamichi...you okay?" He asked worriedly.  
  
"Yeah...don't look at me right now, okay?" The redhead muttered, turning his head to the side.  
  
_Damn. He looked as if he'd been crying all night. Could it be...?_ "Hey, you...!" Youhei suddenly stomped towards the raven head and grabbed him by the lapels. "Just what kind of bull shit did you say to my friend now?! Haven't you put him through enough?!"  
  
"Nothing that concerns you. And FYI, it was far from bullshit." Came the monotonous answer.  
  
"What?! You're really asking for..."  
  
"Hey Youhei...c'mon, it's nothing important!" Sakuragi spoke up hastily. Youhei turned to him in surprise; _he's actually speaking up for Rukawa?! Now something's definitely wrong_... "He...he just said something that, uh, reminded me of...of Haruko chan, that's all. You can't help it, a stupid fox will always be a stupid fox!" Youhei stared at him, his eyebrows slightly raised. Then he released the taller boy. _Huh? Why did I just lie to my best friend?_ The redhead wondered, suddenly struck by guilt.  
  
Youhei briefly scrutinized the redhead's face with skepticism, then sighed as the redhead tried to avoid his gaze. "Hana, we should do about your eyes, cause they look really swollen and painful. I don't know if there's a remedy for ghosts like you..."  
  
"Don't worry, remember I told you?" Kimura spoke up. "Those eyes of his are just a projected illusion created to better display his emotions to you. He can feel no physical discomfort, and they'll wear out soon enough." Then she gave them a stern look. "And if I see any more scuffles like that in my house, I'm afraid I'll have to call the cops to throw you lot out... "

_Huh._ Youhei snorted under his breath. _That bitch acts damn cool about killing someone and stealing his body, yet she makes such a big freaking deal about little things like this..._  
  
"...and to help prevent that from happening, I'm going to let Sakuragi wander along with whomever holds the amulet; mind though, after 12 hours, he must return here." Youhei raised his eyebrows. "That way, you two can work things out somewhere else." _He's not going to be happy about this, but oh well...  
_  
_Huh. She may have a shred of decency after all._ He went to Sakuragi to engage a quiet personal conversation. "Hey Hana, I have good news for you. That weird woman is actually gonna let you stroll around...for 12 hours."  
  
"Are you freaking serious, Youhei?!! Just when I thought I'd suffocate to death!" The redhead could not contain his excitement.  
  
"...yeah, but if it's okay with you, maybe you'd want to stick around with Rukawa more."  
  
Sakuragi's eyes widened with disbelief. "Huh? I don't think I heard you right, pal. You're not suggesting..."  
  
"Look, Hanamichi...I need to get some serious info about this psychic thing. Aren't you looking for a way to revive yourself, too?'  
  
"I am, but hanging out with that dull-as-hell fox may be worse than staying in this stuffy black joint!" Sakuragi retorted stubbornly.  
  
"Come on...at least there's gonna be more to see...and besides, you should give Rukawa a chance to repay what he's done for you!"  
  
"You expect me to be satisfied by forcing me to live his meaningless life? Dream on, Youhei! Besides, we _already _came up with a pact about repayment!" Then uncertainty crossed Sakuragi's face. "But then again, I think I want to alter it a little, now..." he faltered.  
  
Youhei let out a sigh. Y_eah, he'd probably be somewhat happier if I dragged him along to the public library. But then, I won't get any research done, him having nothing better to do than bug me. God know how hard it is for me to concentrate to start with...I guess I'd better do some flattering at this point._  
  
"Hana, do you know what'll make Haruko really, really impressed?" The redhead looked up instantly. "You have Rukawa promise to live his life well on behalf of yours, and make sure he does so...then you can rightfully boast about when we get you back to life."  
  
"...live well on behalf of me? What's that supposed to mean?" Sakuragi was clueless.  
  
"That means Rukawa has an obligation to live his life as happily as you'd live yours!"  
  
_What? Having Rukawa live the life I always wanted to live??_ "Whoa, that's a weird suggestion...though it sounds like an idea." _I don't get why the hell I'd do that, but since I'm a tensai, I'll be sure to discover the meaning of it soon after trying_!  
  
Youhei felt relieved. _Whew. I was worried he'd perceive the idiotic simplicity behind my suggestion...guess he's still too dense about such things._  
  
The redhead then narrowed his eyes suspiciously. "And it better not be some kind of trick, Youhei...or else I swear you'll feel my best head bash yet when you bring me to life!"  
  
==  
  
"So you seriously agree to do it, Rukawa?  
  
"...yeah."  
  
_I know it is plain cruelty to leave Hana with his worst arch enemy, especially the one who caused his death. But I have to find some answers before Kimura decides to do something..._  
  
"Oh, and before you leave, I'd like to give out some parting advice." Kimura stopped Rukawa. "Rukawa, I never thought Sakuragi would go so far to save you, his worst rival...but for everyone's sake, you'd better not develop any positive rapport between him." She lowered her voice. "Contrary to what his friend Mito may think, there is no way to restore Sakuragi back to life...and it's impossible to maintain a happy relationship with a non- earthly being. You'd just end up causing more unhappiness."  
  
Rukawa gave her a disparaging glance, as if she was stating a stupidly obvious fact. "I have no need to, anyways."  
  
Youhei overhead their conversation._ Ch...she expects me to trust her on that, huh? Well, I won't give up till I find out with my own eyes!  
_  
Sakuragi tagged along with the raven head to his house, as Youhei took a different direction to the public library. Forgetting everything else at the moment, the redhead gazed at the colorful surroundings with pure bliss. He's free! "Ahhhh...fresh air at last!" he exclaimed.  
  
Rukawa sighed. "You can't breathe do'aho. You're dead, remember?"  
  
Moment ruined, Sakuragi gave the offender a condemning glare. "Grrr...why'd have to be such a killjoy, you damn fox?! Just remember, I'm forced to tag along with you because Youhei has ten times more important stuff to do!!"  
  
"...and I stupidly agreed to play caretaker for a loudmouth idiot who's just as noisy even though he's dead already."  
  
"Why you...!"  
  
They bickered all the way until Rukawa reached his house. By passers looked at what looked like a self-conversing raven head with bewilderment and pity. They finally got to their destination, a two-story house, almost spotless from cracks or dirt and more than three times the size of the redhead's. A well-tended garden laced the surroundings. Sakuragi was stunned in awe.  
  
"Don't kid me...what's a miserable fox like you living in such a luxury? Hey...if you're so rich, why didn't you get a car, or at least a motorbike like Youhei?!"  
  
"I don't need to depend on my parent's money like that." Rukawa replied curtly.  
  
The front door opened, and out came Rena, the old maid. "Good thing you've decided to return early today, Kaede san. Your mother plans to stay overnight today."  
  
_Like it makes a difference_, Rukawa thought sardonically. "Hey_...that's_ your mother?! She looks older than Youhei's grandma...!" Sakuragi exclaimed in disbelief.  
  
Feeling oddly offended, "She's not my mother, you idiot!" Rukawa retorted. Rena gave him a sharp look. "Mrs. Rukawa will not tolerate talk like that, Kaede san." She chastised in a warning tone.  
  
"I...sorry Rena." He turned to the innocently curious redhead. "She's our maid, you do'aho." He muttered under his breath.  
  
_Oh. How was I supposed to know? Ch, no wonder the fox is so wrongfully vain; he even has someone at home to cater to all his needs..._The redhead thought enviously. "Huh. Never thought you'd be such a spoiled S.O.B., Rukawa." He couldn't help taunting.  
  
Rukawa stopped walking. "She only cooks for me, do'aho." He said quietly without turning around.  
  
Yeah right. Wow, this place is so clean and fancy it almost looks like the downtown mall! What gives that selfish bastard the right to live such a life?!  
  
Rukawa entered his room—spacious, yet just as plain and messy, save some sports idol posters, as Sakuragi's own because he forbid Rena to touch anything in there—and flopped down onto his bed.  
  
Sakuragi frowned. "Hey...it's hardly dark outside, you lazy fox! What am I supposed to do while your napping?!"  
  
"Find something to do on your own, do'aho. You're not my baby brother."  
  
"There's no shit to do in here, all you've got is textbooks and dirty clothes!" _Just like me._ "And I can't wander away from you because of that stupid confining curse!"  
  
"Is that my damn problem, do'aho? You tag along with me, you have to bear how I live my life." He stuck his disc man headphones in his ears to tune out the redhead's accusing yells, and soon drifted off to sleep.  
  
_God, what I'd give to wallop this bastard senseless right now!!_ He stared at the snoring figure with helpless fury, when there was a soft knock on the door, accompanied by a woman's voice.  
  
"Kaede...I'm coming in."  
  
Rukawa opened one eye. Shit. _She's back already?  
_  
The door opened and in came an attractive woman in her forties, dressed in formal business attire. Her eyes searched the room disapprovingly. "It looks much more like a pigsty since I've last visited, Kaede. If you're too lazy to pick up after yourself, you should at least let Rena..."  
  
"She's not setting foot into my room, and that's final."  
  
The older woman sighed tiredly, and took a seat on her son's bed. "I wish to talk to you, Kaede. Get up, will you?"  
  
"I can hear you fine like this."  
  
"No; you've fallen asleep on me enough times. And turn off that disc man."  
  
Grunting, Rukawa sat up grudgingly, and took off his headphones.  
  
She regarded him with a stern look. "I heard about that incident involving with your basketball teammate...Sakuragi, was that his name? You've at least offered condolence to his family, haven't you?"  
  
"Well, this is touching...my mother actually found time to show concern for her son." He muttered with noticeable mocking tone.  
  
"Kaede, I was so worried when I heard of that accident..."  
  
"Hey, you can't speak to your own mother like that! Who'd think you are, ungrateful fox?!" The redhead suddenly interrupted angrily.  
  
"Mind your own damn business..." the raven head muttered.  
  
Mrs. Rukawa stopped. "Excuse me? You know better than to talk to me that way."

_Shit._ "I was only talking to myself, mom." He threw a dirty glare at invisible redhead, who jeered back with his ha-ha-serves-you-right look.  
  
"...as I was saying, I wanted to check on you personally right when the news of the accident reached me, but that meeting with the CEO of Hitachi was just too critical..."  
  
"...so the all-so-independent Rukawa is actually a mommy's boy, eh? Needing his parents to check up on him every time he gets hurt!"  
  
"If you have nothing sensible to say, do'aho, then just cut the crap!" Rukawa snapped, quite fed up.  
  
"Young man..." his mother started in a severe tone. "One more word like that and expect a generous reduction from your sports equipment allowance!"  
  
Dismayed that his face was already starting to tense with anger, the raven head silently fought to maintain his neutral disposition._ I'm almost as idiotically immature as that do'aho, losing control over such a stupid matter._ Just block out that redhead's hysterical snickering, as if it were your sensei's voice...  
  
"Listen, son." Mrs. Rukawa murmured with sudden gentleness. "I know I wasn't there when you needed me the most...but there were just too many things to be stressed about after my divorce with your father, I would've gone insane if..."  
  
"...if you didn't leave your seven year old son in the care of some stranger, and take a four year vacation with that boyfriend of yours." Rukawa finished nonchalantly.  
  
His mother looked away. "Maybe...I was being too selfish about my own pride. Maybe I should have surrendered you to your father's care...but then again, I was worried about that fifteen year old druggy prostitute he kept in his apartment. I tried to compensate for my mistakes, but you never allowed me to, focusing all your time and attention on basketball."  
  
"And I'm all grown up right now, mom...so there's no need to try anymore."  
  
Mrs. Rukawa quickly wiped away her tears, and struggled to keep the grieving remorse from taking over her. "I understand...why you've grown to be autistic as you are, Kaede...and there's nothing I can do. I don't have the capacity nor the right to ask to be that special person...the one who you'd reveal your true self and deepest secrets to. Yuuichiro was that special person to me, as I felt he was the only one who could shed light on my shadowy past, only through him did I find my true self...and realize I was born to love him forever." She suddenly looked ashamed. "Unfortunately, I neglected you—my very special person too--because you hated him so much. As much as I wish I'm given another opportunity to understand your life, I can only hope that you'll find that person someday, and open your heart to her..."  
  
"Can we continue this sometime else? I haven't sleep well in days." Rukawa had already slipped into a resting position.  
  
Sniffling, his mother stood up. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't be pouring out my own regrets, especially not on you." She then reached out and combed back his bangs from his forehead. "But please son, know that I've always loved you the same since you were born, and definitely will be there for you now..."  
  
"I know."  
  
"Well...see you in the morning." She left and closed the door behind her.  
  
Taking a deep breath, Rukawa was about to resume his sleep when the redhead spoke up again, in a somewhat hushed voice.  
  
"Rukawa...did she really leave you in some stranger house?"  
  
Rukawa blinked. Why would he be concerned about such a thing? "Not really a stranger...just her half-brother she never met."  
  
"...and you're still able to live with her, knowing that fact? That's the very reason my mom left home when she was our age..."  
  
The brunette's eyes widened briefly at the question. "I don't hold pointless grudges, and there was no where else to go. They haven't been the best parents, but they're still my parents..." Rukawa shifted to look at the redhead, not expecting at all to see the anger and sadness in those eyes...as if someone had done serious wrong to the raven head, and he wished to provide justice. "What about yourself, do'aho? Your parents have passed away in your very house, yet you still there...all alone."  
  
It was the redhead's turn to be surprised. "Not all the time...Youhei and the gundan stay overnight whenever they get into trouble at home...and that is real often." The conversation ended after that, but a question lingered in the redhead's mind: _is it more painful to have your parents gone, knowing in your heart they loved you more than anything...or having them well by your side, but living with the fact that they abandoned you for someone else?_  
  
Even though he was prying, Rukawa had helped the redhead vent his grief from all those years--with all the pain spilt out, the redhead felt relieved from a heavy burden. He'd never imagine the raven head had such a bitter past of his own. If there was something he could say or do to help...  
  
==  
  
"...you freaking let him go?!"  
  
"What was I supposed to do? I never thought Rukawa Kaede was the type to use such underhand threats. It could've been worse if he didn't agree so; I may have been forced to leak your identity and motive." Kimura replied irately to the man in front of her.  
  
"Hmph...well, I'll make sure they won't get too far with this. If they do, I'll have to make a personal appearance to my 'beloved' Kaede very soon."  
  
TBC


	6. Obligation

Part 6: Obligation  
  
**3:00 p.m. in the park basketball court:  
**  
Sweating profusely, Rukawa Kaede jumped to make a powerful dunk when... "AAAAHHHH!! What's happening?!...my soul....my soul's being sucked away!!!" Startled, the brunette sidetracked in the middle of his leap to check on the screaming redhead...and crashed right into the basketball frame. To his utter agitation, he heard peals of uncontrollable laughter when he hit the ground on his back.  
  
"Ha ha ha...never imagined I'd ever get YOU distracted from a shot, fox?! Don't worry; I've banged my head on the frame once..._when I was just a damn novice_!!"  
  
_F---ing do'aho...actually had me worried for that moment!_ The raven head hurled his basketball at the hysterical figure with all his might, knowing perfectly well it would fly through the moron harmlessly. For the last hour of practice, Rukawa had to endure every second of the blaring, boisterous tensai song. He managed not to let it affect his play, though his head was about to burst with irritation. Maybe he should've just taken off the amulet...but was too paranoid of it being stolen by those neighborhood junkies. "Had enough, Rukawa? Maybe you should consider complying with my wish now." Smirking victoriously, the redhead walked towards the raven head and squatted beside him. Before they left the house that morning, Sakuragi insisted that Rukawa follow his altered 'obligation'...since there was no way he can stay out of the redhead's face now.  
  
**Flashback:  
**  
Mopping his face with a towel, Rukawa emerged from the shower room. 1 p.m.... 10 hours of sleep. Good, his sleeping cycle is finally back to normal. He was about to pick up his gym bag and basketball, when Sakuragi spoke up.  
  
"Where do you think you're going, fox? I've been trapped watching you drool all night, and now I'm forced to see you display your useless basketball skills all day?" The boy questioned, sitting on the side of his bed.  
  
"As I said, I won't let your existence bother me."  
  
Aggravated, the redhead sprung to his feet. "I hate to bring this up again, but I _did_ lose my life saving yours! And my sacrifice is going to waste, seeing how you insist on living your dull, routine life!"  
  
"Do'aho, you don't know yourself what defines a life meaningful...so just shut up."  
  
_Grrr...just gonna ignore me, eh?! Well, we'll see about that, fox!_  
  
**End of flashback**  
  
Rukawa got up to his feet, and started to pack his gym bag. "Hey, Rukawa...are you serious...the tensai has actually dissuaded you from playing?!" The raven head ignored him with a sullen silence. The redhead's feeling of triumph suddenly transformed into guilt as he realized something. _He got distracted only because...he was worried that something may have really happened to me? No way...that selfish fox would've been rejoicing inside! But still, I think I've gone a little overboard this time..._  
  
"Hey Rukawa...don't be such a poor sport, fox!" The raven head still acted as if he hadn't heard. Sakuragi was getting a little anxious. _Oh shit...I really pissed him off now, and I'm not even able to savor the moment! Wait. I got an idea..._ "Listen, Rukawa...I promise if you do as I want today, I'll never bother you during your play OR your nap..." Rukawa finally paused. _And let him live his utterly boring life afterwards. I'll bet I'm gonna regret being so nice..._  
  
"What do you propose?" came the toneless inquiry.  
  
"Mmm...let me think..." the redhead pondered. _Just what are the things that'll show that fox how to make his totally meaningless life meaningful? Aha! I've got it!! I'm the most brilliant tensai in the whole world! Heh heh heh...and with luck, we'll bump into Haruko chan, too. This'll most certainly dissuade her from her wrongful crush on the fox!!  
_  
"Now listen closely, Rukawa..." As the raven head listened, he couldn't suppress a deep sigh. _Is that do'aho serious?! Now I really regret that he saved my life...  
_  
============================================================================================================  
  
Inside the sports equipment store, Miyagi Ryota and the two basketball mangeresses were seen ordering new basketballs for their team.  
  
"That redhead's death has sure traumatized Rukawa a little too excessively." Miyagi suddenly commented, sighing. "I think he's trying to _be_ Hanamichi now..."  
  
Ayako turned to him. "What do you mean, Ryota?"  
  
"When I was passing by the district shopping mall, I saw Rukawa...believe it or not, playing pachinko; and he was apparently with one of Sakuragi's former crushes, Nishida Momoko."  
  
"Pachinko? With that self-centered bitch Nishida? Get out, Ryota...you must've seen someone else! You know Rukawa, there's no way he's that pathetic..." A pink-colored purse dropped to the floor.  
  
"Rukawa kun...with Nishida san...?" Haruko had turned a little pale, and was trembling slightly.  
  
"Hey...don't worry, Haruko! I'm sure Ryota's just mistaken...!" Ayako hastily tried to comfort her.  
  
=======================================================================================================================  
**Meanwhile, in the District Mall**

A tall brunette stood in front of the men's room sink, washing off what appeared to be an ice cream cone shoved in his face.  
  
"I can't believe how stupid you are, Rukawa! You never, ever say anything negative about a girl's looks, especially on a date!"  
  
He grabbed a paper towel and dried off his face. "What did you expect me to do, do'aho? She was trying to put her mouth on mine..."  
  
"That was a kiss, you total moron! How clueless can you be about romance?! It's the most freaking important part of a date..."  
  
"I know what it is, do'aho." He replied as they exited into the mall.  
  
"And to think I recommended one of the finest girls I know to you..." _Although she's the only one out of my fifty one rejections who's conceited and has an attitude problem...huh, I thought she and Rukawa would get along since they have so much in common._  
  
Sakuragi drew in his breath. "You're beyond help to get a life, fox, even with a tensai like me trying to guide you. To you, anything but basketball and sleeping is a waste of your time."  
  
"...the movie and pachinko weren't too bad."  
  
The redhead looked up. "You mean you actually had fun?! I'd thought you'd sleep through that mushy romantic stuff..."  
  
"I said they weren't too bad." Then, "The 'date' is over, right? Now, can I get back to...?"  
  
"Hell no, fox!" The redhead scowled. "You're gonna finish what I've so painstakingly planned for this date, even if it means doing everything alone...!"  
  
"Ano...Rukawa kun." A familiar feminine voice softly interrupted. _Huh? Haruko chan?! What is she...!  
_  
"I don't mean to pry...but Miyagi san saw you with Nishida san. I...I...he told me you two were heading this direction..." She looked down, blushing.  
  
Rukawa's eyed her impatiently. "What do you want?"  
  
Face red as a beet, she stared at her feet. "I know this may be inappropriate, but I cannot keep it to myself any longer. I—I like you Rukawa kun...the first moment I ever laid eyes on you." She managed in a timid whisper.  
  
_NOOOOO!!_ The redhead clutched his head, shaking it furiously. _Even after seeing that fox with another girl, she...!!  
_  
The tall brunette narrowed his eyes. "Do you know Sakuragi Hanamichi liked you just as much...if not more?" he questioned, a hint of seriousness in his voice. That made the redhead freeze. Did he hear that question right?  
  
The petite girl's head shot up, and regarded the raven head in plain surprise, but then looked back down again. "Yes, I actually do...Ayako san finally told me a long time ago; she just couldn't resist anymore..." Haruko suddenly grabbed Rukawa's sleeves, and fixed her anxiously pleading eyes onto his. "But that does not change my feelings for you! Sakuragi kun has always been a good friend, but I'll never feel the same way towards anyone like I do to you, Rukawa kun!"  
  
Lost in her aspiration, the brown-haired girl was clueless of a transparent being taking in every word of her confession...looking on with a pained expression. _Haruko...you knew perfectly well, yet said nothing to me...? What am I to you, exactly?_  
  
Rukawa shot her a cold glare and yanked his sleeves out of her grip. He turned his back to her, but didn't walk away. "If there was a way to talk to the deceased Sakuragi Hanamichi, would you be willing to try?" The raven head slowly reached for the amulet hidden beneath his dress shirt. Sakuragi stared, dumfounded. _Rukawa, you...  
_  
Confused filled her face. _What an odd question!_ "I...I don't know. But to tell you the truth, I don't think I'd have the right to." She looked away in shame. "There is not one day that I prayed thanks that your life was spared, even at the cost of Sakuragi kun's..." At last, the truth. The simple, ruthless truth. Rukawa cringed inwardly, not knowing how the redhead would take it.  
  
The two were silent for a moment. Finally, the tall brunette spoke. "...you can stop praying now."  
  
She set her eyes on him again. "Rukawa kun..."  
  
"I don't have feelings for you or Nishida, or any girl I know. I never had, and there's no way I ever will. For your own sake, stop dwelling in the blind hopefulness like Sakuragi Hanamichi once did." He said non-too gently, yet the coldness had left his voice.  
  
For a moment, Akagi Haruko remained speechless. Then tears started to fall from her hidden eyes, and a small smile tugged at the corner of her lips. "I see...so that's it, isn't it? Your tone tells me more than your words." She lifted her tear-stained face; in her eyes, Sakuragi could see disappointment, hurt, and...resignation. "Thank you for stating your true feelings, Rukawa kun...it's probably the kindest thing you've done for me so far. I'll...see you in practice next week." She turned away and slowly disappeared from their sight.  
  
Sakuragi watched the disappearing figure with a blank expression. _Haruko chan...she knew all along. And with all the kindness we shared between us, I still could not beat down her feelings for the guy she hardly talks to_. He felt an overwhelming rush of sadness and defeat, just like his rejected crush...but also a strange sense of freedom. And unbelievably, the relief was overpowering his pain...  
  
"Let's go, do'aho...get this damn 'date' over and done with." Rukawa cut into his thoughts.  
  
"Oh...okay." The redhead replied in an absent-minded voice. He was just about to follow the raven head, when his vision suddenly blurred. The mall surroundings transformed into a children's playground, all empty except for...himself and Haruko, standing face to face in front of the setting sun.  
  
"I'm sorry, Hana kun...but I think it's time for us to break up." The young girl whispered softly.  
  
"D—do what you think is best, Haruko." He could see himself trying to fight back his tears. "Just know that I will always love you, no matter who you choose to be with."  
  
Haruko let out a sob. "I'm the one being selfish, Hana kun. You've been the most wonderful, caring boyfriend...but I cannot live like this, loving someone else so deeply." She tiptoed and kissed Sakuragi lightly...on his lips. "You'll always have a special place in my heart, too." The brown- haired girl squeezed his hand briefly, then dropped it as she turned away to leave.  
  
"Do'aho, are you coming or not?" _What the...?_ Eyes squeezed shut, the redhead shook his head. When he reopened them, he was back in the mall, with Rukawa giving him an annoyed stare.  
  
Sakuragi placed a hand on his forehead. "She...Haruko chan...my girlfriend...?" he muttered incredulously.  
  
The raven head knitted his eyebrows. "What the hell are you talking about, do'aho?"  
  
"N...nothing you'd understand, fox." He hoped he didn't sound as dazed as he felt. _What is going on?_ "Let's go."  
  
================================================================================================================

**8:00 p.m. at Danny's**  
  
Girls from different tables could not help fix a lovesick stare at the tall, gorgeous young brunette sitting alone at the corner booth. Their dates were frustratingly trying to win back their attention. A sexy dark haired waitress approached the lone boy with his order. "Whoever decided to skip out this date on you must be a total moron, kiddo." Then she gave him a suggestive wink. "But some of us here appear to be much smarter than that. We really should get together sometime..." She murmured in a low, seductive tone.  
  
Rukawa shot a disgusted glare at her. No more...it's been bad enough a day already. "Then I'd be that total moron." He said flatly.  
  
Her eyes widened with anger at his reaction. "Fine. Stay there and rot, for all I care, you bastard!" she almost snapped, and stomped away.  
  
Rukawa started to graze on his fries. Sitting across from him, Sakuragi shook his head. "You're really wasting your girl magnet potential, Rukawa. Have you _ever_ liked someone in your whole life?"  
  
Rukawa didn't stop munching. "One."  
  
Sakuragi chortled with skepticism. "Hah. Really. And just who could be so (un)fortunate as to..."  
  
"My fifth grade teach, Ms. Miyama." He answered promptly.  
  
The redhead sat straight up immediately. "What...your teacher?!" _God, he's been a freak ever since he was in elementary school...  
_  
The brunette frowned disapprovingly. "What's wrong with that, do'aho? She was only twenty-one, and at that time, yet knew no better than a thirteen year old. Way too naïve." _Like you._  
  
"Oh." Sakuragi said, somewhat guiltily at his prejudgment. "Well...what attracted you to her? Was she that pretty?"  
  
"Not really. Just that she took the time to truly listen and understand my problems, unlike other people around me."  
  
"Uhm..." the redhead didn't know what to say or think for a minute. _So the fox did have his soft spots after all...though they're probably extinct by now._ "So...have you ever told her how you felt? Did you ever see her again??" he asked with immense curiosity.  
  
This time the raven head paused his grazing. "No." came the plain reply.  
  
"Hey, why not?! If she was that close to you...!"  
  
"She misled me into thinking the feeling was reciprocal. Only at the very end of the school year was she compelled to admit it didn't run deeper than compassion for her." _It was the first time I'd ever thrown a bitter tantrum right in the classroom, breaking desks and chairs...that woman did not stop me, overridden by guilt. It was damn childish...yet I could not stop myself, could not bear that feeling of being deceived and betrayed again. Huh...out of all people, I'm exposing so much of my hidden weakness to the idiot who looks down on me the most. I'll bet he's itching to scoff at me now_...  
  
But Sakuragi remained wordless, and there was no hint of condescendence on his deeply pondering expression. Finally, he asked softly, "What about Haruko chan, Rukawa? She's the sweetest and most understanding girl I know...and she likes you. Why didn't you give her a chance to know you, to share your problems with her..."  
  
The brunette's eyes suddenly glinted with unknown resentment before he brought his hand non-too gently onto the table top. He leaned forward, suddenly glaring harshly at the redhead. "You don't know anything, do'aho..."  
  
Taken aback, Sakuragi cried, "Hey, what's your damn problem, fox?! There's nothing to be offended about...!"  
  
The raven head locked his piercing gaze onto the redhead's eyes, determined to make him understand just how wrong he was. "However kind-hearted that Akagi girl may be, she'll offer nothing but that same surfeit pity! I don't need anyone to feel sorry for me!" he spat bitterly.  
  
Instead of fervently taking umbrage at Rukawa's harsh words like he was bound to, Sakuragi stared back steadily, eyes surprisingly cleared of any anger. Then he murmured, "You don't think anyone in the whole world can understand your pain, right fox? That's why you'd rather keep it to yourself, and dwell in self-pity."  
  
A staggering look flashed in the raven head's eyes, quickly to be replaced by a fuming anger. He pursed his lips tightly. "What kind of crap..." he started.  
  
Sakuragi stood up, his own eyes flaming. "What's wrong, Rukawa, can't handle the simple truth?! Seems like some overly conceited wimp's trying to escape from reality!" he yelled vehemently, yet there was no disdain in his voice.  
  
"Shut the hell up!!" Rukawa grabbed his cola glass and threw it where Sakuragi was standing. The glass shattered onto the wooden seat, jolting the brunette back to his senses._ I...just lost control of myself, because of that do'aho's words...?_ He realized in disbelief. For a moment, he just stood there, panting heavily, staring at the broken glass.  
  
Then someone tapped him on the shoulder. It was the head waiter. "Sir...your behavior has been rather intolerable for the last thirty minutes. I'm afraid we must ask you to leave." Rukawa glanced at the waiter, his expression had reverted back to its emotionless. He took out two thousand yen and tossed it onto the table.  
  
"Hey Rukawa..." the redhead caught up with the unheeding brunette.  
  
Rukawa didn't turn around. "Get out of my face, do'aho." Came the cold reply.  
  
Sakuragi stopped in his tracks, feeling himself tense with anger. "You disappoint me, fox...I'd never thought someone like you'd give me the chance to say so." He looked down, an unnerving calmness overtaking his features. "At first, I swore to die before admitting this...but now it doesn't seem to matter. I...you were one of the people I've always admired most, Rukawa...your skills, your cool, imperturbable demeanor, even...even your physical attractiveness." He knew he was strangling his dignity at this point, but what the heck...he just _had_ to let it out.  
  
The raven head paused as Sakuragi continued. "All those taunts were just out of jealousy. Not due to the attention you were getting, but because...I wanted to be like you. I used to have dreams before that Toyotama match, that you'd respect me enough to pass me the ball willingly..." He turned back the ravenhead, eyes blazing. "Who'd ever imagine in that in reality, Rukawa Kaede is nothing but a self-pitying brat who denies his own emotions, who tries to act like he's tougher than anyone else?! I may've cried more than anyone else on the team, fox, but that doesn't shame me one bit! At least I'll always be honest about my true feelings!"  
  
Sakuragi was too preoccupied with his outburst to notice that the tall brunette had stiffened his back, quivering slightly with some unknown emotion.  
  
"When I was seven years old...my mother died, and my dad had no choice but to send me into this...run down education camp. There was no room for fairness in that hell hole, let alone sympathy. This group of obscenely rich fifth graders...real little scumbags...was sent there for day care because they were vile beyond reform. Do you know the kind of sick stuff they did?! They beat one helpless little girl to death, forced us to turn against each other! And the caretakers did absolutely nothing, cause their parents paid them plenty to cover up any of the misdeeds."  
  
The redhead stopped briefly, clenching his fist as he recalled the hateful memories. "Believe me, I so wanted to do nothing, sit around and cry for okasan all day and night...no one around me would give a shit. But I knew she loves me, and that was enough for me to move on. So, I learned to survive, to fight everyone, even the counselors. After three years, my dad finally took me away. I never told him of the horrors I encountered in that place...not because I refused sympathy, but because I didn't want him to grieve more than he had to."  
  
"But I couldn't stop fighting with that violent aggression I learned...don't think I ever will; and oyajii died because of it. Until Youhei came by...I'd never thought I could ever trust, or even forgive the world that kept on taking my loved ones away from my side..."  
  
Finally done with his monologue, Sakuragi wearily spun around. "If I didn't have people whom I loved back, maybe I'd end up just like you, Rukawa." He sighed, then quietly asked "You want me out of your sight? Throw away that thing around your neck."  
  
The redhead silently began to walk the other direction, when Rukawa turned to him. "...right." He said in a soft whisper.  
  
Sakuragi froze in his tracks. "...what?"  
  
"You're right. About everything." The redhead turned, and was unprepared to see that vulnerability again, starkly displayed in those fox-like eyes. "I...want you to stay." The brunette almost stuttered, still unaccustomed to swallowing his pride in such a way. After a moment, he added hesitantly, "Please."  
  
The two did nothing but stare, not knowing what else to do. Then Rukawa reached his arm out towards the redhead, slightly beckoning to him. And as if by instinct rather than conscious will, the redhead turned and walked in his direction.  
  
================================================================================================================  
  
Meanwhile, in the public library, Mito Youhei's eyes meticulously scanned all the book titles on the shelf. Religious miracles...voodoo...black magic...aha, guide to psychic powers! He slid the book out, and started flipping through it. _Huh? Why are there so many words I don't know in here? God, just to make things more difficult..._  
  
"Psychic stuff, huh? My big sister used to be really into that." A perky male voice rang out behind him.  
  
Youhei turned around, his eyes widening slightly. "You're...Ryonan's Sendoh Akira!"  
  
Slightly confused, the spiky haired player frowned. "Excuse me, do I know you? But you do look somewhat familiar..."  
  
The shorter brunette gave him a friendly grin. "Yeah, you might know me, but not personally...I'm Sakuragi Hanamichi's friend, Mito Youhei. I was there during that practice match, remember?"  
  
Recognition suddenly flashed on Sendoh face. "Oh yeah...I remember now." Then he threw his head back and laughed. "You were one of those comedians in the audience trying to stir up chaos, huh? Good way to make an impression!"  
  
Youhei scrunched up his face, slightly offended. "...comedians?"  
  
Seeing that the librarians were throwing him dirty looks, Sendoh quickly controlled himself. "Ahh...sorry about that. So, what's up with this psychic stuff?" turned back to the shorter boy curiously.  
  
"Oh...um nothing. It just sparked my interest all of the sudden. But these damn books are so hard to read, I doubt I'd get anywhere." He replied, disheartened.  
  
Sendoh put a hand on his shoulder. "Maybe I can help...my sister was kind of an expert on that stuff, and she did tell me some interesting things; one I found most intriguing was that there's a type of psychic that can actually induce time travel of some sort. But they're extremely rare, and most of the time, kind of freakish."  
  
Youhei gave him a look. "Time...travel?"  
  
Sendoh stared at the ceiling, momentarily lost in thought. "Freakish, but supposedly good-hearted; they try to use their power to right people's wrongs, say, by going into the past or future to change someone's fate. At least that's what my sister read." then he sighed with a smile. "Of course, I've never taken it seriously. It's just like superstition to me, and I don't buy that crap."  
  
_Very interesting indeed...but doesn't seem relevant to what I'm looking for._ "Did your sister tell you anything about psychics reviving people in some way?" Youhei asked, somewhat hopefully.  
  
The spikey haired boy rubbed his chin thoughtfully. "Ummm...nope, never heard of such thing. However, she mentioned that those very rare ones are able to preserve the life of a dying person in some uncanny way...and even give a non- psychic the ability to pass around their psychic powers."  
  
Youhei's face fell. _Kimura was telling the truth, then...it's impossible to bring Hana back to life? No, I can't give up yet! If not by psychic power, there may be some other way...and whatever Sendoh's saying may not be accurate anyway!_  
  
"Don't think there's anything useful I can find in here anyways." Youhei said, grabbing his book bag. "Well, thanks for your help, Sendoh. Good luck with whatever you're researching." He was about to exit when Sendoh grabbed his shoulder again. He turned to see a solemn sincerity on his senior's usually flippant face.  
  
"Before you leave, I want to tell you I'm sorry about your friend Sakuragi, Mito. It seemed you two were very close."  
  
Surprised, Youhei demanded, "Who told you about the incident? Our school took very stringent means to suppress the news from leaking out..."  
  
Sendoh smiled apologetically. "Remember our nosy little manager, Aida Hikoichi? Well, nothing that happens in the Kanagawa district highs doesn't go by him. Hope you don't hold any grudges against the kid, he was extremely unhappy for Sakuragi, too." Then he gave his upset junior a reassuring look. "Don't worry, he and I promise to keep this news between us two."  
  
=================================================================================================================================  
  
**11:00 p.m. in the city park:**  
  
Strolling aimlessly around the playground, the two rivals hadn't spoke a word to each other. _Youhei told me that this park is supposedly the best area to end a date...duh, why did I even bother forcing that fox to tour this place? He hasn't got an ounce of affection in his..._A strange, muffled noise disturbed the redhead's thought. "Hey...what's that noise?" He curiously crawled onto a bench and peeked behind the bushes. What he saw rendered his face blue-green.  
  
"Ru...Ru...Rukawa...!" The redhead squeaked, eyes wide as plates, mouth gaping with horror.  
  
The raven head turned to face him. "What the hell's wrong with you, do'aho? Saw someone else's ghost or something?"  
  
"Even worse...come and see for yourself!"  
  
Rukawa quietly snuck up beside him and took a peek. There they were, two young men making out so zealously, they took no notice of the peeping toms.  
  
"Can you...can you believe...?"  
  
"What? They're just a gay couple. Nothing wrong with that." The raven head replied indifferently.  
  
Sakuragi turned to the brunette with consternation, as if the latter proclaimed that three-eyed monsters were as common as ants. "Whaddya mean there's nothing wrong, you insane fox?! Those are two guys, for god's sake!!"  
  
"...and that doesn't deprive their right to love each other."  
  
The redhead's face was still contorted with disbelief and shock. "But it's...it's just...!"  
  
"It's just not that common, that's all." The raven head finished promptly. "I probably would've been surprised too, except I've lived with two gay cousins since I was seven."  
  
The expression on Sakuragi's face suddenly resembled pity. "You...serious about that, Rukawa? Life must've been horrible beyond bearing!! How could you not have run away?"  
  
Rukawa turned sharply, a very stern and almost condemning look taking over his features. "People don't necessarily have the same tastes as you, do'aho...unless you truly understand how they feel, you'd best keep your mouth shut!"  
  
Sakuragi stared at him for a few moments, then looked away. "Hmph...it's not me, fox. You have a really skewed outlook on things..." he claimed stubbornly, but the certainty was dropping from his voice. _But then I wonder...after all those girl rejections, just what will it be like to love a guy for a change? Is there a possibility at all for someone like me to...Aaahhhh!! Where are these sick thoughts coming from??!_ He so wished he can somehow bang his head on a wall to released those unbearably disturbing notions.  
  
_And to think I almost gave in the urge to tell him what my cousin did to me...like anyone else, he'll definitely ostracize me like some revolting freak from then on.  
_  
"All right, let's go fox. You can go back to your infinitely pointless life..." Halfway through their walk, Sakuragi realized something. Wait a minute...he slapped his forehead and fought the urge to groan out loud. _However I think about it, I've just been with Rukawa on the second half of the 'date'!! Then that makes me...?_ Oh shit, he thought. Now that new knowledge of homosexuality is messing with his mind.  
  
Engaged in his own frustration, he wasn't aware that the dark-haired boy beside him was staring at him, with a certain sadness in his eyes. _You were right, do'aho...except for one thing. It may seem I'm excessively proud of my physical appearance, but in reality, it's been a source of hatefully disgusting memories relentlessly jabbing at my whole being..._  
  
When the two boys were passing under an almost pitch-black underpass, Sakuragi suddenly saw that strange light filling the background. _What the...again?_ This time, Rukawa and himself were back in the park, sitting together on the bench where he saw that make out. He was...chatting with the raven head, so carefreely as if he were Youhei? And that oblivious fox boy actually appeared to be listening, with his intent focus and occasional head nods..._Something's been messing with my head ever since I ran into that weird Kimura lady...giving me these visions that make no damn sense!_ He was about to shake himself out of it when he saw someone approaching the two. A young man who was about their age, looking exotically cherubic; baby-faced, a pale complexion, a spread of freckles across his nose, and...the clearest brown eyes, just like his own. He stood right in front of the two boys, completely still, with a look of unmovable patience on his face, until Sakuragi's noticed him and stopped his babbling. The redhead squinted at the newcomer.  
  
"Hey, fox...you know this guy?" he heard himself ask curiously.  
  
Rukawa didn't answer, but regarded the stranger with dangerously narrowed eyes.  
  
The new boy broke into a polite smile. "Nice to meet you...you must be Sakuragi Hanamichi. Mrs. Rukawa has told me all about you. I'm Rukawa Kaede's appointed bodyguard, Suzuki Masato."  
  
"Body guard...?" the envisioned Sakuragi broke into laughter. "No offense, man...but with that puny physique of yours, I think fox's gonna end up doing all the protecting!"  
  
No trace of ill-will traced Suzuki's face, as he kept his smile as intact as ever. _Hmmm...kinda reminds me of that smiley Sendoh._ Sakuragi thought to himself. "Well, Sakuragi san, believe it or not, Mrs. Rukawa did not choose me based on physical criteria...but rather on high mental capabilities. Not to boast, but my IQ of 220 does qualify me adequately as Kaede san's personal protector."  
  
"Oh yeah?" the envisioned redhead challenged, a smirk still visible on his face; it showed exactly what he was thinking: _Ha ha...he THINKS he has high mental capabilities. It's just that the poor guy doesn't know he's incomparable to a true tensai like me!!_ "And just what do you plan to do with all your brain power, Freckle Face?"  
  
Suzuki suddenly leaned close to the redhead. Underneath the polite friendliness, Sakuragi could perceive something malicious glinting in the other boy's eyes. "Well, if you really want to know, Sakuragi san...I have a duty to keep certain people away from Kaede-san, especially those deemed by Mrs. Rukawa to have an unhealthy influence on her son..." All the light- hearted haughtiness suddenly disappeared from Sakuragi's face...and for a moment, he actually looked...intimidated.  
  
As if sensing the unease, Rukawa suddenly yanked the redhead away from their eye contact. He glowered at his body guard with an implicit threat. "You...f---ing leave him alone, or else. And tell my mother she'd better not bother us again with her stupid shit." He turned to Sakuragi, his eyes softening visibly...and his gaze almost becoming protective. "And you, do'aho...stay away from both of them, and don't listen to a word of bull shit they try to tell you. Let's go someplace else." He quickly walked off, dragging Sakuragi with him.  
  
"Hey, hold on, fox! You're bruising my arm! Slow down...!" Came the redhead's loud complaints. Suzuki Masato stood there with an unreadable expression, watching them disappear. Then he smiled, the same chilling gleam resurfacing in his eyes...  
  
"What's eating you, Do'aho? It's 1:00 in the morning already." The envisioned scene suddenly evaporated, and the redhead was back to reality once more.  
  
"All right, all right..." Sakuragi stopped walking again. "Wait a minute...Youhei told me something was important about 1 am. I wonder..." Suddenly, a glowing mist appeared out of nowhere, and masked the redhead's body completely. "What the hell...?!" was all Sakuragi had time to exclaim before it took him along with it...back to his physical body, back to that black emptiness again.  
  
Too dumbfounded to move or speak, Rukawa only stared at the spot the redhead last stood. Finally regaining his senses, he took out his amulet again and gazed at it intensely. _12 hours...that's all you'll give that do'aho, huh?  
_  
The raven head was still pondering when his eye caught something in the street mirror. Startled, he looked up and saw...a man in a trench coat, hair completely covered with a gray hat and face completely wrapped up with a red cloth. He was standing right by the corner in the back. Rukawa quickly spun around, but saw no one. When he glanced back at the mirror, the figure was gone.  
  
Feeling strangely tense, the brunette called out in an audible voice, "Aka...that's your name isn't it? I'm not in the mood to play your stupid games, so come out and state your damn business!" No answer, except the echo of his own voice. After a minute or so of scanning his surroundings, Rukawa resumed to walking back home again, keeping a wary watch along the way.  
  
TBC


	7. Change

_Finally about half way done; I'm planning to start the de-mystifying with the other half of this story. Hopefully, nothing sounds like far-fetched BS so far! Please continue reading!_  
  
Part 7: Change  
  
With his gym bag slung over his shoulder, Rukawa Kaede was about to head out for his routine practice, when something stopped him. It still feels like something real important is missing. He sighed; this is so not like him. Better check again...water bottle, towel, basketball, disc man, keys...all in the bag. And I did remember to put on shorts, shirt, elbow brace, and...amulet chain. That's it. The redhead? Absent mindedly, he fished out the chained coin around his neck, and started rubbing it with his thumb. _Why the hell do I feel so urgent to have him by my side? I wouldn't even notice him during my play._ He tried telling himself, but his feet just refused to budge. _Because you're tired of being alone, Kaede. Don't lie to yourself._ A tiny voice answered him.  
  
_Shut it. I never was lonely before he came, can't possibly be now._

_Heh. The voice laughed at him mockingly. Are you really sure you want to go practice right now? Indulging in an obsession and sleeping off are good ways to forget your troubles...but there WERE days when you wished you weren't tied down solely on these two activities, wished you can take up those childhood joys before the whole basketball craze...now stop being such a freaking coward, and face the truth!_  
  
Rukawa stood still. Then he closed his eyes, and wished. When he had opened them again, the redhead had fully materialized in front of him. As if just awakening, Sakuragi blinked several times and shook his head before gaining full awareness. He greeted his summoner with a scowl. "What's this, Rukawa?! I thought you wanted to continue your dull-ass life without my interference."  
  
Rukawa dropped his gym bag to the floor and started changing into blue jeans. "You're coming with me, do'aho." He replied curtly.  
  
"And watch you play all day?! I'd rather stay in...!"  
  
"I'm not gonna play today. I need to buy some new clothes anyway and maybe a few CDs too."  
  
"What, I'm not your mother! And who the hell wants to see you dress and undress?!"  
  
"Shut up, do'aho. You're coming, and that's final." With that, the redhead was forced to tag along like a dog on a leash, yelling threats and insults along the way.  
  
==  
  
In the department store:  
  
Rukawa emerged from the dresser room with a Levi's brand top on. The over zealous sales woman had practically shoved 10 different styles of sporty shirts right into his arms. "Which of the t-shirts fit me best?"  
  
"I don't give a shit, Rukawa. Leave me alone." Leaning on a mirror, Sakuragi sulkily looked the other way. _Not as if I can try anything on...  
_  
"Do'aho, if you have nothing better to do, you might as well help out."  
  
"All right, you disgustingly narcissist fox, you look absolutely stunning in each and every one of those goddamn tops! I could see all those chicks around you practically drooling their saliva dry! Happy?!" He snapped. Then another thought occurred to him. "Hey Rukawa...why'd you never try on those dress shirts and open collar polo tops, like those popular pretty boys at our school?"  
  
"...I don't dress to impress anyone."  
  
"Except for yourself? But you just asked my opinion about how you looked."  
  
_Shit. I can't believe that total imbecile actually caught my mistake._ "A do'aho's opinion means nothing." He quickly retorted without thinking.  
  
"F--- you, Rukawa!" The redhead exploded. "If you think my opinion doesn't mean shit, why the hell did you drag me here?! I'd thought you'd be too wrapped up in yourself to purposely piss people off!!"  
  
The raven head stood there, stumped on what to say...and the guilt hit his stomach. _Your pride...stop letting your stupid pride get in the way of honesty._ That tiny voice suddenly popped up again, chastising him.  
  
Silently, Rukawa paid for all ten t-shirts. Then he walked towards a Ralph- Lauren section. The redhead's rants died down. "Hey...why are we looking at such fancy stuff, now?"  
  
"You're gonna help me pick out some polos and dress shirts, do'aho. And nothing crappy, or else."  
  
Caught completely off guard at the brunette's sudden change of heart, he faltered in a rather small voice, "Um, hey fox...I wasn't...wasn't indicating that you should waste your money on stuff you really don't want..."  
  
"Cut the crap, do'aho. I'll eventually find use of it somehow." _Don't know what I'm doing...but it felt good that the do'aho tried to give me a sincerely helpful suggestion for a change._  
  
After an hour or two of meticulous choosing and try-ons, Rukawa ended up buying a lot more of the "fancy stuff" than he'd anticipated. Oh well, he's not paying for his credit card bills anyways. The raven head resented himself for feeling so conceited, but seeing how well those new styles brought out his prideful features gave him a sense of excitement he hadn't felt for a long time. Now, just where can he wear these things without being harassed by girls...?  
  
Then he noticed that Sakuragi was grumbling. "What the hell's with you now, do'aho?"  
  
The redhead shrugged. "Well, first of all, Mr. Spend thrift, you've just spent all that money in front of someone too broke to even buy a pair of sneakers, like it was nothing! And the worse part is you fit all-so- perfectly in anything, no matter what you buy! People like you just take these things for granted...!" he vented, then, _oh crap, why in the world did I just admit out loud that the fox looks good wearing anything?! Arrgh! Now even my pride is stone dead!!_  
  
Mercifully, the raven head stayed silent for a minute or two. Then he mused, "I think that dark navy polo would look better on you, do'aho."  
  
Sakuragi gave him a skeptical look. "Are you mocking me, fox? That's the priciest one you bought!"  
  
"It'll bring out your skin tone really well...and make your frame look as wide as it really is. You'd also want to expose more of that collar and chest. If you ever come back as yourself, remind me to make an exchange for your size." Rukawa went on objectively.  
  
"Don't look down on the tensai, Rukawa. Even though I've much less to spend than you do, I still have..."  
  
"Shut up and accept it, do'aho. If nothing else, take it as the birthday present I never gave you last year." And his glare told the redhead, _do as I say, or else_.  
  
_Damn it! Why does the stupid fox have to be so nice all of the sudden?! Now I feel obligated to withhold my meanness!!_ He cursed his confused feelings, wishing he could somehow avoid the changing attitudes. "So...are we done now, fox? Going back to practice?"  
  
"No...I need some new CDs for my disc man."  
  
==  
  
Sakuragi shifted impatiently as Rukawa took his time trial-listening to the fifteen or so music albums stacked beside him. "Since you have all that money, why don't you just buy them all?"  
  
"I don't waste my money on stuff I won't use."  
  
"Errr..." _Not that I know anything about music, but..._ "What kind of music do you listen to anyways, fox?"  
  
Without breaking his concentration, he answered, "Stuff with a steady, solid beat. It helps me set up a rhythm in my head when I play basketball." He picked up another CD case. "Occasionally, I like to listen to heavy metal stuff, too. Unlike most people, I vent my penned up anger by listening more than physically expressing it." The redhead blinked. _Damn, I have no clue what he's talking about. Hope he doesn't ask.  
_  
The raven head suddenly asked, "You don't really listen to anything, do you, do'aho? Given that you don't have money to buy a pair of sneakers, much less a disc man or..."  
  
Damn! "So what?! My life was happy enough without all that luxurious shit...!"  
  
"I remember you were eyeing my disc man a few times in practice. All you had to do was ask for one."  
  
Sakuragi snorted. "Stop trying to pretend you were so much more generous than you are, fox. Any retard would've known your damn cold response..."  
  
"I'd make an exception for you, do'aho...if giving your best on the team required virtually all your money, there's nothing wrong with being provided some other simple necessities." _Since you're working so hard on court, you deserve some better means of relaxation.  
_  
That surprised the redhead into silence. Did something in Rukawa's head snap, causing a 180 degree turn in his personality? Sakuragi was still speechless when Rukawa purchased the albums he wanted, headed out the door, and stopped for lunch at the soba shop in the food court. Finally, the redhead mumbled something. Rukawa looked up. "What was that, do'aho?"  
  
"I'm sorry...and thank you, Rukawa."  
  
The raven head slowly ceased slurping his noodles, and gazed strangely at the boy in front of him.  
  
"You...apologized to me and actually said that 'please' word. I know your pride is just as steely as mine...even though the tensai has ten times the reasons to be proud." He quickly added at the end. "You didn't need to; I've always treated you like a dangerous rival."  
  
"........" All the raven head could think was: _And neither of us would probably ever have had the nerves to drop that superficial enmity, if...  
_  
Reddened face turned away, "I don't like saying this a bit... but I gotta thank you, like you were a really good friend like Youhei or...Haruko chan." He admitted gruffly, but the genuine gratitude was inescapable in his tone. "I don't know a lot of guys who actually take out their own time to try and help me out." He suddenly lurched forward. "Just one thing, Rukawa. Mind calling me 'Sakuragi' from now on like everyone else, instead of do'aho? Since we've kinda stopped fighting so much...maybe...uh..."  
  
"...I mind." Rukawa replied flatly.  
  
Sakuragi wasn't sure he heard right. "What?"  
  
"I want to call you do'aho, and there's nothing you can do." _'Do'aho' was always the special nickname only I was privileged to call you...if I start using your surname like everyone else I'd be just someone else to you...right?_  
  
The redhead scowled, angrily surprised. "Now you're carrying this too damn far, you vicious fox. Even I'm..."  
  
"I have the right to call you whatever the hell I want, do'aho." The raven head said curtly. His face was a strange mix of bewilderment and stubbornness, thinking, _after all those deep personal things we've made known to each other, do you see me just as another acquaintance...?_  
  
Sakuragi was so mad he didn't know what to say for a moment or two. Then, "...if you still wanna taunt me, then call me Hana...or Hanamichi, you damn fox." He offered quietly. "No one else calls me that anymore, save five people. Only the gundan and Ryochin call me that, and without making fun of the 'Hana' part. But your spiteful self can laugh all you want inside your head."  
  
Both boys were quietly still for the moment. "Hana...Hanamichi." Rukawa started repeated to himself slowly, as if trying to learn a foreign word. _Never could stop wondering about it every time captain or his best friend mentioned it. Seems so unfit for that bullying do'aho at first glance, but on the second thought..._ he lifted his eyes to meet the redhead's. "The name's too good to be laughed at." his stoic voice had a note of gentle persuasion.  
  
Sakuragi's eyes followed the other boy as he got up from the table. _I always kinda wished I could somehow read that fox's mind...never had a hint why he acts the way he does._ "...so it's agreed then, fox?"  
  
The brunette gave him a perfunctory nod. "Let's go, do'a—Hana."  
  
==  
  
In a small coffee shop a few blocks from Ryonan High, Sendoh Akira leaned forward and rested his chin on his palm. "Before we start anything, Mito, be so nice to tell just who provided you my home address and phone number?" he asked the freshman in front of him.  
  
Youhei gave a mischievous grin. "Who else other than your nosy little manager, Aida Hikoichi? I guessed someone so obsessive compulsive would be hanging out in the gym all the time."  
  
"You didn't hurt that kid, did you?" Anyone who had the nerve to tease Sakuragi Hanamichi like that couldn't be overly mild-mannered himself.  
  
"Hey, don't worry man...it wasn't anything physical." All Youhei had to do was dangle that stupid little notebook out of his reach and over an open gutter.  
  
Sendoh sighed a took a sip of his ice coffee. "So...you're still trying to help out Sakuragi, huh? I can tell you a little bit more about psychic powers." He asked, with a small smile.  
  
Youhei gaped. "How...how...?"  
  
"Well..." the spiky haired boy's smile turned knowing. "It seems that Sakuragi had passed away less than a week ago, yet his very best friend's preoccupied with researching supernatural stuff, without a trace of depression. C'mon, anyone would've been suspicious."  
  
_God, I swear the first time I saw him, this guy seemed to be omniscient..._ "I thought you said that stuff was crap."  
  
"I believed it was...but after thinking over how you're taking it, I might convince myself to be a bit superstitious." The smile didn't leave his face. "Unless _you've_ gone insane...but I can usually tell if someone is ."  
  
The shorter brunette slumped in his chair. _Great...now I've inadvertently brought in an outsider. Fortunately, it doesn't seem Sendoh's the type to cause trouble._  
  
"Of course, I'm totally clueless about the exact situation, and have no purpose to pry myself into it. Just think it might be helpful to tell you a few things...first of all, remember those preserved souls I was telling you about the other day? My big sis told me they possess supernatural powers of their own, like being able to read people's thoughts."  
  
"And also able to foresee the future?"  
  
"That I can't say for sure...it's possible." He took another drink. "And I also heard that they're able to convey their special abilities to another non-psychic. You may take advantage of that, Mito, if it's doable at all."  
  
_Good stuff to know about. But there is just one thing that still confuses me like hell..._ "Since you know the bulk of our situation anyway, wouldn't matter if I told you a little more. Give me your opinion on this..." Youhei retold the story of meeting Kimura before the incident occurred, and how reality produced a different outcome than the vision transferred to Sakuragi. "...it could've been a fake vision, right?"  
  
Sendoh scrunched up his forehead in deep thought. "You know...it sounds more like he _produced_ an alternate reality."  
  
"Alternate reality? What the hell is that?"  
  
"I don't know how off my supposition is, but I'm hypothesizing that the first vision was entirely accurate, that Rukawa was _supposed_ to be killed...except some unnatural intervention got in the way, namely Sakuragi being foretold about it. This interference and your best friend's resulting decision derailed their normal course of fate, branching out into multiple paths different possible outcomes." The older boy paused suddenly. "But then again, I've no logical guess why'd that psychic even bother informing Sakuragi if she really wanted Rukawa dead..."  
  
As Youhei was listening to Sendoh, something clicked in his brain. Wait. I remember when we first stopped by Kimura's house...she was telling Rukawa about someone completely ordinary, yet able to determine his future. Ability to time travel. Alternate realities, caused by unnatural interventions. This may be going somewhere...! "So...those foretelling visions may not complete happen if something out of the ordinary somehow got in the way." _Come to think of it, just when did Kimura and that other man start manipulating their fate? Probably impossible to tell, unless we ask her..._  
  
Sendoh held up a finger. "One more little detail I remember...those capable of prophesizing the future can also perceive those different alternate realities that were _meant_ to have happened, but prevented."  
  
Meanwhile, Youhei was lost in his own thoughts. _This may just be a wild guess, but could that Aka actually have come from the future, and is trying to prevent from happening? But just who is he? Could he be anyone we happen to know in the present...?_  
  
"Well...that's all I can provide you, Mito." Sendoh stood up and slung his bag over his shoulder. "Good luck with helping Sakuragi...and the bill's on you, right?"  
  
"Huh?" That snapped him out of his contemplation. "Hey...I didn't promise anything about treating you!" Youhei complained.  
  
"C'mon, I just saved you a bunch of research time...gotta expect something in return, don't I?" He flashed his junior a super charming smile and a wink, throwing the latter off guard with his totally cool response.  
  
_Geez...this guy could freaking get away with anything, looking all so cool and sweet..._ "Oh, all right...whatever." Youhei grumbled, to his own chagrin.  
  
==  
  
"Now are you going to practice?" The redhead tried again as both boys strolled down the road.  
  
"Not yet. I have something to show you." Rukawa replied impassively.  
  
_Something to show me?? Just what in the world would compel him to...?_ Sakuragi was wondering, when his companion suddenly stopped and stooped down. "Huh? That's what you want to show me?" he asked skeptically, raising one eyebrow.  
  
Rukawa tickled a black and white stray kitten gently with his forefinger. "No, do'aho...I was just moving her away from the main road, so she won't be run down by cars."  
  
"Heh...so you like cats, don't you?" _Hey, they fit his personality, too...but he still looks more like a fox._ "Too bad you weren't born one yourself, naturally freaky and egotistical like them..."  
  
"They're only freaky to simple-minded do'ahos...and at least they're much more peaceful company to have around than you." He retorted. But then added quietly. "Peaceful, but not the best company when you're really depressed." _And I never realized that until..._  
  
"...kittens...they're...just like kittens to me?" The redhead suddenly uttered, his eyes large with revelation. Rukawa turned to him with a questioning look. "Girls, I mean." _The way Mr. Stone Man was so uncharacteristically adoring these kitten...it so reminds me of that feeling whenever I see a cute, petite girl._ "No, that's impossible! There must be hell of a lot more than that!" _But then again...why fifty rejections in just three years? He recalled the caustic fact. Why did I switch from girl to girl so quickly? Shit. Ever since the damn existence of homosexuality was brought into light, I've been freaking paranoid about my attraction toward females._  
  
Rukawa did not remove his gaze from the brooding boy. _Wrong...that's how deep the affection runs, do'aho. The expression in your eyes when that Akagi Haruko is present matches exactly how I feel these kittens, no more or less...or even the excitement and adoration of some silly girls over a very expensive dress or a piece of jewelry. The real reason you want them is cause they're cute and sweet, and you think everyone else has them.  
_  
They shortly resumed on their way in silence, when Sakuragi again spoke up. "Hey Rukawa...since you're so cool about gay stuff, do you know how it's like loving another guy like that? But you said you've also had a crush on a female."  
  
"You can't always tell from the start, D—Hana...michi." The raven head answered promptly. "And you can also be bisexual and attracted to both sexes."  
  
"Wow...never imagined anything so bizarre..." Then the redhead frowned. "Wait a minute...just how do you know if you're gay or not?"  
  
Rukawa drew a deep, uncomfortable breath. "Use your common sense, do'aho. You'd get excited around a guy and have those damn sexual fantasies about him."  
  
"Sexual fantasies about a guy?! Well...no, the tensai never had any of that crap. That means I'm not gay, right? Ha ha ha!" _Then again...I was never that into reading the playboy stuff like the other gundan, or fantasies about naked girls...nah, it's because I'm just too decent of a guy!!_  
  
The raven head didn't answer, but led the way onto the city bus.  
  
When they finally got off, the redhead found themselves in an isolated, mountainous forest area. "Hey...just what is this place?!"  
  
Rukawa headed towards a series of stone steps leading up to one of the mountain tops. "Get climbing, do'aho."  
  
==  
  
About an hour or so of climbing, the redhead was getting impatient. "Geez, just how long is this stupid hike gonna last?!"  
  
Sweating and slightly panting, the brunette turned to him. "You're the last one who should be complaining do'aho...you can't feel an ounce of fatigue."  
  
_Yeah, but it's so damn boring! What could possibly be up there worth showing me?!_  
  
"Do...Hanamichi." Rukawa unexpectedly started. "I told you before, there's nothing wrong with liking another guy, if it's genuine."  
  
_Huh, not again! Of all people, why is HE so unwilling to let this freaking issue go, so persistent in persuading me?!_  
  
"If you're so smart, you shouldn't always follow the main stream beliefs."  
  
"What...are you insulting my intelligence, fox?!"  
  
"Take it however you want, do'aho...but _don't_ prejudge." He shot back; the sudden heatedness in his voice startled the redhead.  
  
"...Don't you order me around, Rukawa." He muttered angrily, but he was thinking, _I've always despised those senseis and classmates who looked down on me because of my naturally red hair...am I no better off then them, if...?  
_  
Youhei's voice suddenly popped up in Sakuragi's head. "Freedom's always been your best quality, Hana. You like to bend or break the rules, for better or for worse...but it's always better in the long run, cause you never blindly follow them like so many others around you." _Blindly following the rules set by those old idiots...  
  
_"We're there." After the last step, the redhead found himself standing on a steep hill peak. He couldn't help gasp at the breathtaking sight before him.  
  
"It's...beautiful." Was all Sakuragi could manage as his awed eyes took in the gentle sunset rays seeping through the misty woods below them.  
  
"I'd always come here to this one place whenever I wanted to be cut off from everyone else." Rukawa told him quietly. _He's the first I've every taken here, and hopefully he'd be the last._  
  
Sakuragi caught sight of his companion—still as a statue, breeze ruffling his silky black hair, and eyes staring far into the distance._ It feels like one of those special moments, when you really want to do or say something memorable or else the significance will be lost forever. But just what..._  
  
Reach out and touch his heart.  
  
_Huh? Who said that?_ The redhead spun around, but there was no one except for Rukawa, eyes closed and too absorbed in his own world to speak.  
  
This is the moment. Put your hand on his chest, and you will know. _Wait a minute. This voice is...coming from my own head! It's the same voice I hear before I'm transported to Youhei or Rukawa! Should I...?  
_  
As if spellbound, Sakuragi slowly approached the unsuspecting raven head, and pressed one incorporeal palm onto the other boy's chest. All of the sudden, the redhead felt as if he were sucked right into the raven head's own body.  
  
Rukawa's eyes flew open in shock and he stared at the redhead. "What the...the hell are you doing, do'aho?" A frantic tone had broken through his always calm, monotonous voice. He tried to step away, but was gripped tightly into position by some unknown bond. Meanwhile, images started to flood into Sakuragi's head; images of Rukawa living at his half-uncle's house. "NO!" the raven head could no longer hide his mounting fear. "Stop! Don't...don't make me remember...Stop it!!" He stooped down and dug his fingers into his hair. But the redhead couldn't...something inside urged that he just had to know. Amidst the obvious anguish of his rival, Sakuragi excavated those secret, unwanted memories.  
  
And there they were: a eight or nine year old Rukawa Kaede, all...naked and bruised, and tied up. A sixteen year old boy looked on, grinning with perversion at the little boy. "Should be glad you're pleasing, runt. You're mother never wanted you, and neither did my dad. You'd better thank me, cause I was kind enough to out of my way to convince him." With that, the older boy viciously grabbed little Rukawa Kaede and satisfied his own needs with brutal roughness. The redhead could see the tears running down the kid's little cheeks, face twisted with agony and humiliation, painful cries muffled by masking tape. And the teenager went on with his torture almost every day, even twice a day sometimes...and the seven year old would slink silently in the corner of the house, with no one bothering to pay attention. Little Rukawa eventually ceased showing so much pain and tears on his face, expression replaced by a blank numbness. This appeared to displease the older boy. "So...think you're getting braver, huh, runt?! Well, I'm gonna break your stupid pride!" And the older boy's tactics became increasingly sadistic and demeaning each day, but cautious enough not to leave an apparent bruise or signs of mutilation. Each time after the teenager had his fill, he'd sneer at the little boy lying motionlessly on the floor. "You can tattle tell all you want, Kaede...but no one's ever gonna believe you. I'm too perfect of a student and son in their eyes, and they're just gonna view you as a disgusting brat with an abnormally perverse imagination."  
  
Back in the present, tears started to run down Rukawa's cheeks as he lost complete inhibition of himself. "Stop it. Stop it...you're killing me." He moaned helplessly.  
  
Sakuragi was almost speechless, appalled by the atrocity of the ordeal, but set by a firm determination._ No...I gotta finish it._ "Hang in there...you have to let it out, Rukawa. You helped me, and I'm now gonna help you vent..." he managed to whisper encouragingly.  
  
The redhead focused again, and saw...little Rukawa was finally driven over the edge by the mistreatment; he took a piece of the torture device and jabbed it deep into his older cousin's leg. Moments later, the little boy was being beaten viciously by his half-uncle, not uttering a sound the whole time. Finally, his panting uncle hissed, "You keep far away from my kid, you little f---. You and your worthless self was never welcome in my household, and I would've thrown you out now if my son hadn't pleaded for me not to."  
  
The scene changed to young Rukawa, shoulders being held by his mother. "Kaede...why did you hurt that psychiatrist? He was only trying to help you! And why...just why are you not speaking anymore?! Answer me, goddamit!" She cried tearfully to the quiet little boy who stared emotionlessly back at her.  
  
...and the vision ended. Still dazed, the redhead looked down at Rukawa, slumped down and sobbing quietly. His whole childhood was destroyed by such unspeakable experiences. An overwhelming pain plunged into his heart, but he managed to fight off the wetness that was forming in his eyes. _I so want to cry for him...but I can't. I have to be strong, so he won't feel so helpless and alone.  
_  
"Rukawa..." Sakuragi started, but then silenced himself. Finally calmed down a bit, Sakuragi's thoughts started to penetrate the raven head's consciousness as well. _If only...I was somehow there, maybe I could've done something, prevented one less day of that horrible torture. I've been so proud of myself for fighting off harm with my own hands, but what good will that do when I can't help protect those in need?!!_ Rukawa stopped crying all together. He lifted his tear stained eyes, and saw Sakuragi trembling with fury and grief. The redhead's suffering eyes seemed to mirror own heart, blatantly reflecting every bit of the immense pain he felt inside.  
  
He turned to the raven head, the pain suddenly mixed with pure hatred. "I swear, Rukawa...the moment I get my body back, we'll track down that f---ing bastard together, and I'll make him apologize in front of you that he was ever born...!" Sakuragi promised intensely. Speechless, a lone tear trickled down Rukawa cheek, not because of grief, but because he almost felt...touched. Here was the do'aho who hated and ridiculed him all his life, yet now hating and grieving so much just for him? He turned away and replied softly, "I did try to track him down by myself two years ago...but he and his family disappeared entirely. His habits probably got exposed at some point."  
  
"Doesn't make a damn difference...he's gonna pay, if it takes the rest of our lives!"  
  
The anger and determination had not subsided in the redhead's eyes. _Thank you, do'a—Hana. Really. Then he chuckled inwardly. But you got the roles reversed. You're the one who needs the protection...someone so innocently naive like you. There's no way I'd forget the pain and humiliation during that time no matter how I take revenge, but seeing the way you're standing up for me..._  
  
They quietly headed back thereafter. "So you're finally going to practice, huh?"  
  
"No. I'm gonna take a nap for today."  
  
==  
  
Rukawa tossed himself onto the bed and slipped the covers over himself. Ten minutes had passed, yet there was still no sound of snoring.  
  
Sitting on his desk, Sakuragi frowned slightly. _Is he sleeping to escape from what just happened?_ "Hey Rukawa...do you hate me at all for what I just did? Be honest." Silence. "I know you're still awake! Answer me!" The redhead was getting frantic. "Please?!"  
  
"...do I have the right to? I did the same thing to you." Rukawa finally replied.  
  
"....." _Yeah, but that was different. I actually intruded into your personal thoughts...I was just trying to help him, have him share his pain._ Then the question suddenly hit him: Why? Why try to be such a big part of Rukawa's life, know so much about him? Sure, he's proven himself a little more decent of a guy than previously thought, but that's no reason..._someone, something tell me, what exactly are we to each other NOW?? Someone please just let me know somehow, goddamit!!  
  
_As if his plea was answered, Sakuragi fell into another trance preceding those visions. This time he was brought to a...night club dance floor? The club was overcrowded and wild, bodies convulsing to the beat, lights dancing all over the dimly lit arena.  
  
"Woohooooo!! You are sure missing out, fox!" The redhead's eyes traced to the source of the familiar voice, and yep...there was himself again. Wait...isn't that the dark navy polo Rukawa promised to send him earlier that day? The envisioning redhead watched in dumbfounded silence. _Hey, who taught me to dance like that?! I never bothered learning! And isn't that Micchy, Ryochin, and Youhei dancing right with me?!_ The four companions were bumping and grinding their sweaty bodies against each other, as well as some other dancers on the floor, when a strong, pale arm shot out from nowhere and grabbed hold of the dancing Sakuragi's, pulling him through the crowd and out the door. "What, not again! Kaede, you're being a real kill joy!!" Sakuragi tried to yell above the deafening music.  
  
?! Did he just call Rukawa _KAEDE?!_  
  
Sakuragi followed the couple all the way into an apartment...the same one he saw in that second vision! The raven head threw Sakuragi on to the bed and slammed the door. He stared at the flustered redhead, suddenly crinkling his nose. "Go take a shower, Hana. Now."  
  
Sakuragi scowled back at him. "Look Kaede...I did nothing wrong! I was simply having some fun with our old friends, and you, for no apparent reason, dragged me all the way home without even letting me say goodbye! And now you're bossing me around like Gori used to...!"  
  
"Talk about this later. Just get your butt in the shower." He stopped, appearing to change his mind. "Actually...I'd better go in and clean you up myself. Move it."  
  
Sakuragi's face turned has crimson as his hair. "You what?! No way, I'm a grown man now, Kaede! You gotta save me my damn dignity...!" His complaints seemed to have fallen on deaf ears as he was once again forcefully led into the bathroom.  
  
"Ow—ow—ow...you're scalding me, stupid fox!" A clotheless redhead protested as the equally undressed Rukawa poured a tub of warm water onto his back.  
  
"It's supposed to help you relax, do'aho...and clean off all the germs and dirt from those other dancers bumping into you." The raven head answered curtly.  
  
"It was just for fun, Kaede...I know you're not as touchy as...hey!" the redhead gave a surprised yelp as Rukawa started to...run his tongue all over his neck.  
  
_Has that fox gone pervertedly insane?!!_ Horrified shock filled the watching redhead, but was quickly taken over by an intriguing curiosity.  
  
"I'm...going to lick you clean of their touches, Hana." The tall brunette whispered almost breathlessly. His cold expression suddenly melted into a desiring gaze.  
  
Sakuragi watched himself lean back so his head lay on the raven head's shoulder. _Oh shit...not me too...!! But for some reason, it looks...kinda comfortable and cute lying on the fox's shoulders like that?!  
_  
"Uh...hold on fox. You wanted to tell me something...this morning." The redhead sighed, his eyes closed, face blissfully eased. Rukawa's mouth was now traveling down his spine, making him gasp. "Ahh...tell me...now, before you forget. We can always continue this later." The raven head withdrew his mouth and gently turned Sakuragi around to face him. A solemn expression resumed itself on his face.  
  
"Hana, remember that incident about my older cousin, Kajii?"  
  
At the mention of the name, a burning glare immediately replaced the redhead's dazed eyes. "Why...have you seen the asshole around or something?!!" He growled menacingly, grabbing Rukawa's shoulders.  
  
"Shhh...that's not it, Hana." The raven head gave the boy a reassuring look, yet a glint of pleasure did not escape Sakuragi's attention. _He's actually glad that I'm so worked up for him...  
  
_"Good. I gave that bastard the best I've ever got...there's no way he'd ever leave the hospital."  
  
"And I had to step in to exculpate you from the charges of assault, with a little bribery, do'aho. I knew I never should've told you, no matter how hard you pressed me to."  
  
"And I would've never forgiven you if I had to learn it from someone else, Kaede. I knew you had some trouble dealing with the police, but no need to have blown your head off at me like that. It was so worth it I'd be willing to serve jail time for ten years."  
  
Rukawa's expression suddenly hardened like stone and he grabbed the startled redhead's chin tightly. "Don't you ever goddamn say or even _think_ that, Hana! I'll massacre all the police officers and prison guards before you set even a foot into a prison cell! Besides..." the raven head's face filled with anger and agonizing worry as he recalled the moment. "God knows what that bastard Kajii would've done if he'd the chance to lay his disgusting hands on your naïve self, Hana. I was scared to death when I heard you'd gone to find him on your own! I didn't sleep, eat, I hardly breathed until we finally found you!"  
  
The redhead's features suddenly softened, filled with guilt. He soothingly wrapped his arms around Rukawa, running his fingers through the boy's hair. "I'm so sorry, Kaede...I promise never to stray out of your sight without telling you."  
  
"...and I'll make sure you never stray out of my sight, period." The raven head uttered with a chilling sternness, but his body was no longer tense with anger and anxiety. He sighed contentedly, burrowing his face deep into Sakuragi's shoulder. "What I had to tell you this morning was...how you freed me from his relentless grasp on my being, not by taking vengeance but by being close to me...and by being yourself." He suddenly took Sakuragi's wrist and brushed the latter's palm on his lips. "First, you loosened my lips, so I can talk about my true feelings to someone else...even if it's just to you, Hana." he murmured the words with an extreme delicately, as if chanting a sacred prayer.  
  
"Kaede..." The redhead whispered gently.  
  
Next, he pressed the hand onto his chest. "Secondly, you freed me from that barrier I built around me. I had thought I could never trust or love anyone else without getting hurt...many times I even hated my own self. But you broke that vicious cycle, giving back my self-respect...and someone to trust and love with all my heart. It feels again because of you." The unrestrained love and gratitude in his eyes matched his words. "Finally..." He guided Sakuragi's hand lower and lower...down to his crotch. Mortified, the redhead tried to pull free, but Rukawa held on tight.  
  
"Ka—Kaede, that's enough...!" The redhead spluttered, his face red and steamy as a boiled tomato.  
  
"...you set me free from that fear of being touched, or even being loved. It had never left me since I was in third grade...but after having you by my side, it seemed almost none existent. Your warm, sweet body erases the marks his slimy, disgusting mouth made." The raven head was getting visibly excited from the touch of the other boy. Sakuragi himself appeared to follow along, however, and had stopped struggling; both were slowly relaxing their eye lids, their breathing increasingly audible and quick. After a minute or so, Rukawa opened his eyes, still not letting the hand budge from its spot. "I can desire and love another like any other man now, Hana."  
  
With that, he jerked the redhead to his feet, led him out of the bathroom, and onto the bed. "Hey...we're still wet! At least we should towel off first, you perverted fox!" Sakuragi laughingly protested. His protests were cut off by the raven head's most passionate soul-kiss he'd ever seen; at the same time, Rukawa's hands were everywhere on his exposed body, with no ounce of inhibition...  
  
"Why are you staring in space like the do'aho you are?" A voice cut in his awareness.  
  
Before he knew it, he found himself back in reality. Rukawa glanced at him with an eyebrow raised before sliding out of bed and into the bathroom. _So I'm...a homosexual? No! Just when are those messed up visions ever gonna stop??!  
_  
Just guess. You know what to do. _It's that same voice again._  
  
Sakuragi closed his eyes and searched deep within his own heart, and finally made up his mind. _Shit. It doesn't make sense at all! But if it's the only goddamn way to find out..._ He passed through the bathroom door and saw the raven head drying off his face with a towel. Rukawa glimpsed at the redhead and paused. "What do you want?" He asked, bewildered.  
  
Sakuragi did not reply, but steadily approached the boy with an unreadable expression. _What do I want? I don't know either, Rukawa. But I do know I'm through being shocked and utterly confused by those damn visions. Maybe...if I do this, I'll finally know what's happening to me, if they're actually true or not. Don't think at all, don't think at all. Just do it—quickly._ Stopping right in front of the perplexed raven head, Sakuragi leaned forward and pecked his intangible lips against the other boy's warm, solid ones. The realization of his action hit him immediately, and he withdrew like lightning. Rukawa's eyes were wide with shock. "Just what...?"  
  
The redhead covered his mouth with his fingers. "N—nothing! I just wanted to show you I'm not discriminating against homosexuality, anymore...ha ha ha! It doesn't matter, cause I'm not really alive, and I didn't really do it!" He grinned frantically. To his surprise, he felt a pang of disappointment, as if he'd woken up in the middle of a great dream.  
  
Rukawa, still too stunned, unconsciously started to caress his own lips. "Do'aho—I mean Hanamichi..."  
  
Sakuragi suddenly felt a throbbing pain in his heart as he stared into the raven head's eyes. Then it seemed like his heart was skipping every other beat. _What is happening...? I...shit! I...!_ He quickly spun around. "That meant nothing! You hear me?! Freaking nothing!! I was just trying to prove to you...!" To his horror, tears started spilling out his eyes, and his heart beat just pounded faster and faster. He quickly sprinted out of the room. Rukawa threw open the door and followed him.  
  
Hurt flooded the tall brunette's eyes as well, and...he was now gazing at the scurrying redhead's back with an entirely foreign expression, one he'd never laid upon anyone else in his life. "Hana...wait!" He called.  
  
"SHUT UP!! I've just tricked you into believing I had feelings for you, huh, stupid fox?!! Ha ha ha! I did it! I freaking won! You must really hate me now! I'm just one of those damn people who abandoned you, played with your emotions!" God, I don't know what the hell I'm saying...I just want to get away from him, before...before...! The redhead tried to sound as haughty and mean as he could, but his voice was too thick with the uncontrollable feelings. He stopped running, fell onto his hands and knees, and started laughing helplessly.  
  
Rukawa crouched beside the boy, bending down to look at him. He caught the tears streaming down the redhead's face, and the confused pain in his features.  
  
Sakuragi's laughter suddenly transformed into choking sobs, he murmured. "Messed up...I'm so freaking messed up."  
  
Rukawa looked on as the sobbing figure vented his frustration and confusion towards his own feelings. Finally, he whispered firmly, "Stop crying, do'aho. Or else you're really gonna get it from me."  
  
Eyes burning, Sakuragi snapped his head up. "What in hell do you care, Rukawa?!"  
  
"I care...cause it feels so painful seeing you cry like this." The redhead stopped sobbing abruptly, because his rival was gazing at him all so differently, eyes filled with unmistakable warmth and...loving concern.  
  
Hypnotized by the unbelievably gentle look, Sakuragi's mind slowly put together the whole situation: when he looked into the raven head's eyes right after the kiss, he felt an intense, strange feeling...a longing, so strong that it started to hurt—bad enough to make him cry unwillingly.  
  
Rukawa reached out and placed his hand soothingly on the redhead's illusionary cheeks. _You had no idea, do'aho...how I had to keep that same pain and confusion you were feeling hidden from not only you, but myself, way before that accident that took away your life...but just scared that you'd be totally disgusted. Who in hell would've thought...you'd be the one to make the move._  
  
Warm knowing eyes met truthful yet uncertain ones, generating an emotional gravity that neither could defy, drawing their faces closer and closer, bit by bit. At the same time, the answer became crystal clear to the redhead: he'd always yearned something from the pale young man in front of him...something that transcended any boundaries of gender notions, deeply rooted rationality, and even the physical world.  
  
Finally grasped with certainty, Sakuragi lowered his eyelids and whispered, "You know what, fox? I don't think I'd mind being gay at all."  
  
The corners of Rukawa's lips suddenly curved—curved into a small yet loving smile. "Of course you don't, do'aho." He replied, as if he'd somehow known all along. Two sets of eyes closed, distance between the boy's lips vanished. Sakuragi could feel neither the warmth nor softness of his rival- turned-lover's lips, and the raven head was kissing thin air. But they both felt the moment in their hearts, felt that the whole world had shrunk down to just them two, and time had frozen, preserving them forever in the amorous gesture. After a long silence, they finally withdrew, still gazing intently in each other's eyes.  
  
"Hey, Rukawa..."  
  
"Kaede...unless I'm still nothing more than a teammate to you."  
  
"Oh...Kaede." Sakuragi reddened again. _Why do I feel so damn timid in front of him all of the sudden?! He used to be my pummel partner, for god sake!_ "...I think I just went berserk into self-denial...because I was so afraid you'd be my 52nd rejecter."  
  
"...if I didn't want you too, I wouldn't have bothered to follow you out the bathroom."  
  
==  
  
Unknown by the two preoccupied boys, man with a red cloth masking his face emerged from behind the tree trunk in front of Rukawa's house. He slammed his fist on the wood, screaming "Why?!! Why, despite all my efforts?! Why have they still...?! Never mind. I'll change that very soon." Still trembling with anger, the man took out a photo of Sakuragi and Rukawa standing side by side; Sakuragi was grinning from ear to ear at the camera with his arm hugging the raven head's shoulder, while Rukawa had turned his head a little to gaze affectionately at the redhead.  
  
_Heh. I know you better than yourself, Rukawa...your gay cousin Kajii's prolonged abuse incapacitated your ability to freely release physical desires...causing involuntary repression of carnal needs. Although you're good at hiding it, I can tell your self-control is waning fast from all that penned up desire_.  
  
He tore off the half with Rukawa's image, shredded it, and let the pieces flutter away with the wind. _Rukawa Kaede, your deepest weaknesses, desires, and fears all are in my very grasp. And the person you love now has absolutely has no means to satisfy your hunger, him being no more than a shadow...there's no way you can resist me!  
  
_TBC


	8. Alteration

_I think this story's unfortunately going to take longer than I thought to finish...--; hopefully it can still retain someone's interest till the end._

_Just as a note, this chapter takes place a few days after the last one. Pls R&R again!_

**Part 8: Alterations**  
  
_BANG._ A loud gunshot sound echoed throughout the still air. _What the hell...?_ Sakuragi thought to himself as the vision before him took form. _It's_ _midnight...at the roof top of some run-down abandoned building. Wait a minute...this looks like our Shohoku high school roof top!_ A heavy, painful panting broke into his awareness, and he turned around to see...himself again, yet in a strangely dejected condition: worn-out clothes, hair cropped yet again and his whole being looking much paler than before, almost like an escaped convict. He was apparently straddling someone, but that person was lying out of view. The redhead's eyes were unbelievably wide, body trembling with disbelief, as he fixed a frozen stare at a tall brunette pointing a smoking pistol at him...Rukawa Kaede. The watching Sakuragi could tell the man was indeed Rukawa, but he stood too far away to perceive his facial emotions.  
  
"Kaede...? Rukawa...Kaede...?" The redhead's quivering voice was hardly above a whisper. Blood suddenly splurted out from the young man's chest, but he didn't seem to notice at all, let alone try to clutch the running wound. Nothing but pure shock remained in the redhead's eyes, yet hot tears started to trickle from them. "You'd rather take my life, Kaede...to save this scummy bastard's...?" His voice finally broke, the rush of abundant tears rivaling the life flowing out of his chest. Wordlessly, the raven head answered by firing another shot at him. Sakuragi jolted as if struck by lightning, and slowly slumped to his side. As he was falling, his grief- stricken eyes never left his assailant.  
  
Too appalled to notice before, the envisioning Sakuragi finally saw the person being straddled by himself...a gorgeous young man with freckles. He sat up, coughing and clutching his throat, as if someone had been choking him. Although his beautiful face was contorted with pain, he still looked recognizable..._Hold on...isn't that the freckled face body guard I saw a few visions ago? Suzuki Masato._  
  
_Why...what's this supposed to mean? That Kaede's one day gonna kill me for someone else...??_ A crazed, agonizing feeling seized him. _NO! It's a damn lie!! LIAR!!!_  
  
"Hanamichi...."  
  
As if awakening from a nightmare, Sakuragi jerked himself back to reality. Still panting slightly, he searched the familiar surroundings...he was in his best friend Youhei's room, and there was Youhei, sitting right in front of him. His best friend regarded him with worry.  
  
"You okay, Hana?"  
  
"Youhei...?" _Calm down, Hanamichi, calm down. It must've been one of those fake, messed up visions. He hastily assured himself. Don't be a total moron, Hanamichi, cause there's no way in hell Kaede will EVER try to hurt me, let alone do such a freaking horrible thing!_ "Youhei, what am I doing here?"  
  
The shorter brunette smiled in relief. "I summoned you, of course. About time I wrapped up with this damn research, it's been ten days. I can't believe how much I missed you, o' buddy!"  
  
Finally composing himself, the redhead grinned back joyously. "Yeah...the tensai has to freaking admit that he misses you as well, pal." _It's already been ten days since we last met...but time sure flies when I'm with my fox. Still, not seeing Youhei for more than a week is way too long!  
_  
"Hana, before anything else, I really apologize for leaving you with Rukawa for so long...it must've been hell of a week for you." Youhei told him rather guiltily.  
  
"Hey, don't sweat it at all, Youhei buddy...Kaede's actually learning how to have fun now, believe it or not!"  
  
Youei raised his eyebrows. "...Kaede?"  
  
The redhead grinned shyly and rubbed the back of his neck. "Ahhh...I mean Rukawa. But I've gotten too used to calling him Kaede."  
  
A sudden pang of jealousy poked at the shorter brunette, but he quickly repressed it, chastising himself. _What's wrong with you, Mito Youhei? Shouldn't you be happy Hana has one less person to hate?_ "Mind filling in your best friend about this past week?" Youhei asked inquisitively.  
  
Sakuragi blushed even harder, almost as if confessing his feelings to a girl. "Will you still...be my best friend if I told you I like guys now?"  
  
Youhei's jaw dropped, but quickly moved to shut it again. _Hanamichi? Gay? Just what has being with Rukawa done to him...?_ "...why wouldn't I be, Hana? You're still Sakuragi Hanamichi no matter what you like, aren't you?"  
  
Sakuragi drew a sigh of relief. "Of course. Nothing will change me from the tensai you know! Yeah, so this is what happened..."

===========================================================================================================

Rukawa opened one eye. 10:30 a.m. already? Oh crap! The redhead's gonna give him another earful for making him wait through his dozing time. Still lying down, the raven head hastily took out the amulet and started summoning...two minutes have passed, and no sign of the mist that transported Sakuragi's soul. Rukawa blinked, then summoned again. Then again. Nothing happened. The brunette sighed impatiently. Shit. What is taking that do'aho? Or is this stupid necklace malfunctioning? Wait a minute...could that woman Kimura have done something? He just recalled...her mentioning almost a week ago that she's going to figure out what to do with the redhead's body...has she decided something? A sudden panic surged up in the brunette's heart, and he sprung out of bed. Not even bothering to change, he quickly grabbed his keys and wallet, and sped out the door._She had better left Hana alone...or else there'd be hell to pay!_

================================================================================================================

The shy look never left Sakuragi's face as he recounted the events that brought the unexpectedly close friendship with the fox-faced boy, and eventually led to relationship beyond that. Youhei listened so intently as if he were in a trance.  
  
"...Kae—I mean Rukawa takes me wherever I want everyday, even if that meant cutting three hours from his practice time. And you know what? That fox hasn't dozed off once these days he was spending time with me. In fact, he actually smiles secretly whenever he wins our bet in the arcade. He thinks I don't notice, but I DO." The redhead gazed off in the distance with a loving look in his eyes. "Rukawa Kaede trusts me with all his heart, Youhei...and you know how he proved that? When I asked if he was worried I'd abandon him too, he told me to place my hand on his chest and search his heart again. He actually encouraged me to read his mind about how he really feels!"  
  
Youhei had been slouching forward, resting his chin on his folded hands. He sat up straight. "So...Rukawa's become both a best friend and a crush, just like Haruko." He hoped his voice didn't give away any of that childish bitterness he was feeling.  
  
"He's not a crush at all, stupid!" Then murmured in a timid voice. "We feel the same way bout each other, and know it like no other...but I can't see him as a best friend like you, Youhei." The redhead looked down. "Something damn freaky's been going on this whole week. I've so wanted to tell someone, but...I can't trust Kaede to understand."  
  
_I'm still irreplaceable in his heart_...Youhei realized, a sense of pride and relief filling him. "Heh...it was the last thing I would expect, Hana...you finding love in such an unusual relationship. But I gotta tell you, I'm happy that someone's finally returning your feelings." Then his best friend's kind voice turned all serious. "We'll chat some more fun stuff later, but for now...we'd better get to business here, Hana." "Just what are the freaky things that were happening the past week?"  
  
Sakuragi scratched his chin. "Well...just a lot of visions. Many of them don't seem to make any damn sense at all, though." I can just hope so.  
  
Youhei leaned even closer to his friend. "Tell me about them, Hanamichi. As detailed as you can."  
  
So Sakuragi proceeded to narrate what he envisioned every day of the week. It mainly took place the day right after his father passed away: during his first year in middle school.  
  
=======================================================================================================================

**In Sakuragi's vision:**  
  
Right near the corner of the Shohoku District Hospital, a 12 year old red- haired youth moped aimlessly around the block, his fiery brown eyes unusually dull and sad. _Oyajii...it was all my fault! Now, I have no one who truly cares about me!_ The young Sakuragi quickly brushed away the tears that had welled up in his eyes.  
  
"...ano...are you all right?" a familiar, cute feminine voice asked softly. It was Akagi Haruko, except with more childlike features and uniform that was unmistakably from a junior high school.  
  
The young redhead eyed her briefly, then paced away. "Yeah, I fine." He muttered carelessly.  
  
"You've been pacing around here two hours since I went in to get a health check up. Are you sure...?"  
  
"Geez, don't you have better things to do?" He snapped at her irritatingly, but a look of guilt immediately crossed his face.  
  
Totally unintimidated by his attitude, the young girl knitted her eyebrows. "You sure are rude. I was just trying to be..."  
  
"All right, I'm pacing around here cause my dad just died from a heart attack right in that damn hospital! Get it?!" He spun away to hide his tears, but could not hold back a choking sob. "I'm...just starting to miss him a lot, that's all."  
  
For a minute or two, Haruko gazed at the trembling figure wordlessly. Then she placed gentle hands on his back. "I'm...so sorry to hear that. It's the most terrible thing in the world to have lost someone you love." She whispered tenderly. The girl fished out a handkerchief from her purse and turned the boy around to scrub his tears away. He covered his face shyly.  
  
"No...don't!" He protested, but Haruko persistently removed his hands and wiped his cheeks dry.  
  
"You'll catch a cold if you stand out here all night. Let's go to a coffee shop and get you some tea, so you'd calm down a bit." She took him by the hand.  
  
Still sniffling, Sakuragi turned bright crimson. He tried to thank her, but felt too embarrassed to open his mouth.  
  
"I'm Akagi Haruko. And your name?"  
  
"Hanamichi. Sakuragi Hanamichi."  
  
"Hanamichi...?" She gave him a warm smile. "That's such a lovely name."  
  
A week later after they've met...  
  
"Hana-kun!" The junior-high redhead looked behind him and saw a petite figure waving at him. "Ohayo, Hana-kun!"  
  
"Hey, why don't you ever call me 'Sakuragi'?"  
  
"Because 'Hana-kun' sounds so much cuter!" She giggled as Sakuragi blushed. "Besides, I'll never have the chance to call you that in front of everyone else, especially my parents and Takenori oniisan. They'll misunderstand." She grabbed his sleeve. "And I'd appreciate it if you'd call me 'Haruko', instead of addressing me as 'hey' from now on."  
  
Embarrassed, Sakuragi hastily said. "No problem...Haruko. I just didn't know what you preferred to be called."  
  
"I never thought boys can be so shy...we've known each other for a week, Hana- kun! Unfortunately, we go to different middle schools..." She said rather disappointingly. Then her eyes lit up. "Do you know what, Hana-kun? Oniisan promised me he's going to make it as the team captain of the Shohoku High basketball team in his senior year! That means if you happen to enroll into Shohoku in your freshman year, you could be on his team! That is...assuming you like basketball, of course..." Haruko added somewhat embarrassingly.  
  
"Basketball? What's that?"  
  
Haruko stared at him pensively. "Hmmm...sounds like you're a complete novice. Maybe I can get you into the sport, Hana-kun! It's real fun!"  
  
"Really?"  
  
"Of course! I'll come over tomorrow after classes end, and show you how to apply to Wakou's basketball team!"  
  
====================================================================================================================

**Reality:  
**  
"It's real odd, Youhei...cause in real life, I remember being kicked out of the hospital area real shortly, after some freaking SOB lied to a nearby cop I was bothering bypassers. If they'd left me alone, I wonder if I'd really have met Haruko chan that time..."  
  
"You lied to me, Hana. About your dad's death."  
  
"What? Oh..." Sakuragi looked down. "I...I didn't mean to, Youhei. I was just so ashamed...about failing to save him." He explained anxiously.  
  
Youhei drew a deep breath. "There's no need to be ashamed about anything with me, Hana. Just tell me the truth no matter what from now on, okay?"  
  
=======================================================================================================================

**Vision:**  
  
A few months later:  
  
Scowling, Haruko backed a panicky young redhead against the wall. "Hana- kun, I caught you talking to those mean-looking boys at your school again. Are you thinking about fighting with them?!"  
  
"Ah...you mean Mito and his gundan? No sweat, Haruko...we made a pact not to beat each other up anymore after you yelled at us. Besides, that Mito Youhei isn't too bad of a person..."  
  
"All they do is bully people all day, and you have better things to do than that, Hana-kun!" She started to tremble slightly. "You can do whatever you want...just nothing violent ever again, okay, Hana-kun?" She pleaded softly, tears running down her cheeks.  
  
"Oh god...Haruko, I'm so sorry! I won't ever fight again, just please don't cry...!"  
  
The girl brushed her tears away. "It's all right. I just don't want you in any trouble." A cheered smile then lit her face. "At least there's some good news...your coach told me he's amazed with your performance on the team. Even though you've started only two months ago, he's positive you'll become a court sensation real soon!"  
  
Blushing, the young redhead rubbed the back of his neck. "That's cause...you've always come all the way to my school gym to support me, Haruko. I'd never pull through the beginner stage without you." He then noticed the brunette girl was looking at him strangely, with a tint of red on her cheeks as well.  
  
"There's something I wanted to tell you since you joined your school basketball team, Hana-kun...I was reluctant to say this before, because my oniisan's real protective of me." She suddenly grabbed his hand with both of hers and leaned forward to him. "I can't keep this to myself anymore, Hana-kun. To tell you the truth, I...I like you. You've been a great friend ever since we've met, but...the way you'd always rush to my side when I sound upset...and all those times you'd chase off those bullies, made you someone unique in my heart." The tinge on her cheeks darkened and she squeezed her eyes shut. "Of course...there's also the fact that you dazzle everyone, including me, with your performance in the basketball court. I look forward for classes to end just so I can see you play."  
  
Feeling a large, warm hand on top of hers, the young girl opened her eyes, and saw the redhead returning the same gaze, cheeks as crimson as hers. "I...I like you too, Haruko. You're the one that's always been there for me."  
  
They both experienced their very first kiss that day.  
  
And true to the coach's prediction, Sakuragi Hanamichi of Wakou Junior High shortly became known as a rare basketball prodigy. Some say his coach, holding high hopes for him, pushed him relentlessly harder, almost to the point of exhaustion...but that only drove him to love the sport even more. His pretty and perfect girlfriend Akagi Haruko was so preoccupied watching his progress she never got to visit a nearby junior high school, Tomigaoka, where another reputed basketball player with black hair and blue eyes was passionately honing his skills, too.  
  
Events shift to Sakuragi's freshman year in high school.  
  
"Why didn't you tell me about your relationship with Sakuragi?!" Hands on his hips, Akagi Takenori glared sternly at his younger sister.  
  
Ashamed, Haruko hung her head down. "I'm sorry, oniisan...but you and dad are so strict about boys, and...and Hana-kun's really special to me. I didn't want to lose him." She then lifted her head to stare back at her brother, eyes filled with tears. "Please don't kick him out of the team, oniisan! He's been so good to me...and he really loves basketball as much as you do!"  
  
Akagi's stern glare faded, and he let out a deep sigh. "Coach Anzai and Kogure wouldn't be happy if I did, anyways. Sakuragi's too valuable of an asset on the team, no one can deny that. And he's not too much of a nuisance to work with." Then his voice hardened again. "If he does you any wrong at all, Haruko, then he'd be thrown off without any second chances...so make sure you report to me any mistreatments!"  
  
Sakuragi's grace and power left the whole gym astounded. His teammates looked at each other. "...is he really just a freshman? He plays like a pro!" He heard them whisper. "Maybe...with him, we can enter the interhigh championships this year!"  
  
Smirking like no other, the redhead's thoughts were clearly written on his face. _Heh, all that three years of hard work, along with my naturally born tensai potential...!_ A giant, powerful fist suddenly whacked him out of his egotistical joy.  
  
"Don't get too confident just yet, you idiot...haven't you heard about those in Kanagawa that match up to your skill, if not surpasses it? Especially that freshman Rukawa Kaede, who just joined Kainan University high this fall, and that's plain bad news for all its competitors, including us Shohoku!"  
  
Rubbing the bump on his head, Sakuragi muttered, "Hmph. Who's to worry about this Rukawa Kaede, Gori?! Just watch, I'll crush him during our match with Kainan!"  
  
The scene shifts to Shohoku's match against Kainan University High. On the Shohoku side, Akagi Takenori, Mitsui Hisashi, Kogure Kiminobu, Miyagi Ryota, and Sakuragi Hanamichi represent their team. On the Kainan side, Maki Shinichi, Jin Soichiro, Kiyota Nobunaga, Takasago Kazuma, and Rukawa Kaede represent their high school. The two teams lined up against each other on court, two well known opposing super rookies made their first eye contact.  
  
The redhead scrunched up his face. "Huh. I've been waiting to beat your egotisitical self in front of an audience for a long time, fox face!"  
  
Rukawa Kaede narrowed his eyes. "Do'aho...don't disappoint me."  
  
After an extremely intense playoff, the two teams ran into overtime. Sakuragi proved to be the very backbone of his team's strength, with his amazing stamina and skills that very much rivaled Kainan's silent rookie's. In the end however, Shohoku still lost by two points. Fist clenched and eyes burning with unwilling defeat, Sakuragi stood by his teammates as the Kainan players marched by them.  
  
"What a pity..." Sakuragi heard the reticent Kainan player mutter, as he passed by the redhead. "...we'd have made a perfect team, working together." When Shohoku got back to their assigned locker room, Sakuragi found a slip of paper stuck in his locker. Call me. Phone #: xxx-xxx-xxxx. –Rukawa Kaede.   
  
As it turned out, Rukawa Kaede had been so impressed with Sakuragi's performance that he implicitly wanted to challenge him again—personally, one-on-one in a park basketball court. Each time, they'd always end up in a deadlock; neither one making progress until they passed out on the ground with exhaustion. Of course, they'd always bash each other after every stalemate, each claiming himself as the true winner. Without knowing it, the two rookies had become inseparable practice partners, despite the distance and disparity of their social status.  
  
"Just tell me one thing, Rukawa...why are we spending more time practicing with each other than with our teams?"  
  
"...that's what I'm asking myself, do'aho."  
  
And life pretty much stayed that way for Sakuragi Hanamichi and his new found practice partner, until summer break neared.  
  
"So...what's the freaking deal about this, Ryochin?!" The redhead grabbed Miyagi Ryota by the collar, eyes burning with jealous rage. "Steal my girlfriend when I'm not around, will you?!"  
  
The short point guard pulled himself free and glared back at the redhead defiantly. "You brought this upon yourself, Sakuragi Hanamichi! You being so obsessed practicing with Rukawa and forgetting about your own team, forgetting about her!" He then quieted down as the redhead appeared taken aback. "Look, I'm sorry things turned out this way, Hanamichi...at first, I posed as a comfort companion for Haruko-chan because Ayako asked me to as a favor. Then...our feelings for each other escalated just like that."  
  
Infuriated, the redhead lifted his fist to punch out the sophomore. "And you think that justifies...!!"  
  
"Hana-kun, stop!" Tears streaming down her face, Haruko ran up from behind him and grabbed hold of his raised arm. "It's not Ryota kun's fault...I'm the one to blame! I was the one who insisted on starting our relationship!" Sobbing openly, "Please...please don't hurt him, Hana-kun..." she begged desperately.  
  
Frozen in place, Sakuragi stared down at his crying girlfriend, then slowly turned back to his guilt-stricken senior. He brushed Haruko's hand off of his and strutted off silently, pushing Miyagi roughly out of his way.  
  
That night, he received a call from Rukawa. "Why didn't you show up at the park today, do'aho? You had me wait three hours..."  
  
"We're through practicing together, fox." The redhead replied sullenly.  
  
"What the hell's gotten into you, do'aho?"  
  
"Well, unlike you, Rukawa, I happen to have a life outside of basketball! And playing with you all this time freaking ruined it!" He blurted out angrily, and slammed down the phone receiver. After a week or so, when the redhead eventually got over the pain and anger, he started to feel guilty about his attitude towards the raven head that night; how was that fox to know, anyways? The reluctant Sakuragi finally decided to phone Rukawa and...admit his attitude wasn't all too justified. A servant picked up, and to the redhead's dismay, Rukawa just left for Narita airport to go to America; he wouldn't be back for at least two years. Seized by desperation, Sakuragi hastily made up his mind to catch the raven head before he boarded the plane. Panting and gasping for breath, the redhead caught the tall brunette just before he passed through the passport check.  
  
Rukawa blinked. "What the hell are you doing here?"  
  
"I...uh...I—I shouldn't have yelled at you the last time we talked, Rukawa. It had nothing to do with you."  
  
"You came all the way here just to apologize? Such a do'aho."  
  
"Hey, shut up and accept my apology, fox! It's not everyday the tensai confesses his damn mistakes!"  
  
"Fine; apology accepted. Now out of my way..."  
  
"One more thing, Rukawa..." the redhead tried to sound as gruff as he could, but he could not hide the disappointment in his voice. "I've improved a whole lot playing with you...but since you're running off to somewhere else on such short notice...well, see you in a few years!" He abruptly turned to run off, but a hand caught his, and started dragging him off in another direction.  
  
"Hey, what...!" The completely perplexed Sakuragi started to protest.  
  
Rukawa stopped at the ticket counter, and ordered another plane ticket to the states.  
  
"Huh?" Sakuragi scratched his head. "Whose ticket is that for, fox? You lost yours?"  
  
"It's for you of course, do'aho. You're coming with me to the states." The raven head replied nonchalantly.  
  
"WHAT?!!" Sakuragi yelled so loud it was a wonder the security alarms hadn't gone off.  
  
"It doesn't seem you have the resources to train in the states anytime soon, so this'll be a great opportunity for you anyways."  
  
"B—but I didn't pack any of my clothes, and I still have bills to take care of at home!!" The redhead cried incredulously.  
  
"We'll buy you some more clothes, and maybe a fake passport when we get to America, do'aho. I'll arrange one of my servants to take care of things back at your house. Now stop whining, or we'll miss our flight."  
  
=========================================================================================================================================

**Reality:**  
  
"...so that's what I've been dreaming up so far." Sakuragi finished. "They're just plain senseless, but then again, I can somewhat connect them together."  
  
Youhei snapped his fingers. "That's it...that must be it! Sendoh was absolutely right about all that alternate reality crap!"  
  
"Huh? Why'd you talk to that smiley for?"  
  
"To be honest, he provided me with loads of info...My research would've taken so much damn longer if it weren't for him." Youhei then sat up excitedly. "Believe it or don't Hana, but I'm positive all those visions of yours are true...everything in reality was _supposed _to happen the way you envisioned, but someone—or something from another time period intervened."  
  
"Just what are you talking about, old buddy?"  
  
"Remember you were saying you might've met Haruko outside the hospital that time, if someone didn't ask a police officer to drag you away? Someone must have been trying to prevent you and Haruko from meeting up that time!"  
  
"Okay...even if that crap is real, why the hell would someone do that? It's plain ridiculous! Besides...in my vision, Kaede went to _Kainan_, not Shohoku! How do you make sense of that."  
  
"Welll...there must be some explanation about that. Maybe the culprit manipulated Rukawa's path for whatever reason." The brunette replied thoughtfully. Then he suddenly smiled amusingly. "Did you notice, Hanamichi, that if events followed how your visions went, your fantasy of Haruko being your girlfriend, and you being a true basketball genius would've been realized1"  
  
Sakuragi pondered over his friend's remark for a little, and then frowned. "My _previous _stupid fantasy, Youhei. Everything's all so different now."  
  
A series of sudden, sharp knocks on the front door startled the two friends. "Who the hell could that be?" Youhei wondered. He cautiously opened the door, and "Rukawa. I should have known." With an unusually fuming look on his face, the tall raven head wordlessly brushed past Youhei, and made his way swiftly to the bedroom. _Uh oh._ The shorter brunette thought as he quickly followed along.  
  
"Kaede! What are you doing here?" came a happily surprised greeting from the redhead.  
  
"What am I doing here, do'aho? You had me worried to death when you didn't answer my call! Why in hell didn't you tell me you were coming here?!!" Rukawa demanded, not bothering to hide his exasperation.  
  
"I...uhm...really didn't mean to make you worry, Kaede. It's just that Youhei got to me first, and I...missed him so much, I kinda forgot how you might..." The redhead said in a tiny, sheepish voice, his head bent in embarrassment.  
  
The raven head's face tensed with anger and...something that almost resembled jealousy. "So that's how it goes...I'm just some crappy diversion to toss aside when your _real_ companion comes to pick you up, is that it?!"  
  
Hurt and resentment surfaced onto Sakuragi's features when he heard the accusing tone. "You're taking it too damn far, Rukawa Kaede! You can't deprive me of my right to miss someone else...!"  
  
"Hey...hey...that's enough, you two! My parents are gonna storm up here any minute!" _Huh. They sure don't hate each other anymore, and yet their fights seemed to have become more serious..._ "Just cool it, okay...?" He stopped short when the tall raven head suddenly turned to him with dangerously narrowed eyes, as if he were the direct cause of their conflict. _Geez...who does he think he is! Better not assume I'm the type to submit to his irrational threats!_ Incensed, Youhei threw back a challenging glare. A timid voice suddenly cut into the two brunette's glaring contest.  
  
"I'm sorry, Kaede, you're right...I was being damn inconsiderate. Please don't be so mad at me." Turning to the redhead, Rukawa's expression softened immediately as they looked into the redhead's sincerely remorseful, tear-filled ones.  
  
"I'm not mad at you anymore, Hana. But you have to let me know where you are at all times." The tall raven head ordered in a gentle but stern voice.  
  
Youhei gawked at his best friend, not believing his eyes. Just how in the world could that cold bastard possess so much influence over Hana's emotions? It's not right!  
  
"Come on, Hana, let's go. I need to talk to you." Rukawa beckoned to the redhead briefly.  
  
"Oh, all right. But what about Youhei?"  
  
The raven head scowled. "What about him?"  
  
_Hell, not again._ Youhei drew a deep breath. "Don't worry about me, pal. We'll just catch up on things some other time." He assured his best friend.  
  
As Sakuragi followed the raven head outside, a menacing realization suddenly hit him. _If Youhei's right, if all of the visions are real, then the one I had this morning...god, no!! Oh please, Youhei, be wrong this once, just this once!_ He turned his gaze to the pale young man walking in front of him. _Kaede...just how long will our feelings and trust for each other last? No...! I have to believe in him, no matter what! Nothing will stop me from helping him get over his past!_ The redhead vowed heatedly to himself, determined to dispel the fearful uncertainty forming in his mind.  
  
TBC


	9. Second Appearance

_Finally getting into the core of the story...hope it still sounds original enough, and that there are minimal holes and contradictions in the plot. As always, reviews are greatly appreciated!_

**Part 9: Second Appearance**  
  
Back inside his room, Youhei sighed as he stretched out on his bed. _Never got to talk to Hana about the reviving issue...probably a good thing, cause the best solution I've come up with is traveling to the past to save him. And if that alternate reality theory holds, I've a feeling it's not gonna work like we'd want to. Shit! After all this info digging_...  
  
========================================================================================================  
  
When the two tall boys stepped outside Youhei's house, Rukawa turned to his unearthly companion.  
  
"What did you and your friend talk about?"  
  
"Uhm..." _Should I let him know about those visions now? Nah, he'll freak out on me again for not telling him first. Maybe next time._ "Just buddy talk...if you know what I mean, Kaede. I asked him what crap he's been up to, and he asked me how we got together."  
  
"You weren't too specific about our relationship with him, were you?"  
  
"Hey c'mon, Kaede! Youhei's my best friend, for heaven sake!"  
  
"I don't care who he is, Hana...our relationship is our business, and no one should pry into it."  
  
_Who'd ever thought that dead silent fox'll turn out to be so damn bossy about these things?! But at the same time, I feel...nicely secure that he's this jealous._ These mixed feelings were really starting to frustrate him. "Where are we going now, fox?"  
  
"You decide, do'aho. Like always."  
  
"Hmmm..." Sakuragi stole a glance at Rukawa, and was surprised to see slight stress on the pale boy's face. "Hey Kaede, what's wrong?"  
  
"Nothing."  
  
"See, you're lying to me through your teeth now, you stupid fox." The redhead muttered angrily. Then it occurred to him. "You really miss playing basketball, don't you, Kaede. All this time, we've been doing whatever I wanted..." Guilt laced his voice.  
  
The raven head turned to him sharply. "Do'aho, stop imagining things!"  
  
Sakuragi sighed. "We'll go wherever I want for just a little bit, and I'll leave the whole night for yourself, fox. A tensai knows tis'nt fair to force his companion when he's not having a good time..."  
  
"No you're not Hana...we're spending time together like always."  
  
"You don't freaking need to oblige yourself, Kaede...!" Seeing that Rukawa refused to back down, "Besides...besides, I want to, uh...spend a little more time with Youhei!" He exclaimed thoughtlessly. _Oops, oh shit! Why did I blurt out the worst excuse possible?!_  
  
The ravenhead stiffened. "So that's your real reason, huh? Fine. Have it your way."  
  
"No, you stupid fox! It's just that I—I..." speechless with shame, the redhead averted his pained eyes from Rukawa. _It's partially true, I DO want to see Youhei a little more, but it was meant for Kaede to have a good excuse to do what he really misses to think of it, I'm really holding him back! I've had so much fun being with him, I kinda forgot I'm...just a freaking phantom._ His eyes dulled out at the impact of the hurtful realization. _We can't eat together, play basketball together...or touch each other at all. I got him into some fun stuff, like movies and videogames. But if those are the only things we'll ever be able to do together, then being with me will just freaking make his life so much more damn meaningless than before!!_ The cruel reality finally hitting him, Sakuragi felt almost as if he was smashed to bits after falling from the top of the world. He fought the sudden urge to cry in self-anger and bitterness. _And to think that his reciprocal feelings for me was the best thing that happened in the world...Sakuragi Hanamichi, what kind of damn tensai are you anyways?! You're existence is just a freaking burden on the one you love so much, and you've never even thought of that till now!! Damn you, stupid Idiot!!_ For the first time in a long eternity, the young man lashed harshly at himself and renounced his boastful title.  
  
"...did your friend find some way to revive you?" The pale boy suddenly asked, with surprising coincidence.  
  
Snapping out of his self-assault, the redhead immediately brushed away the tears before Rukawa could turned around to face him.  
  
"No, he never got to say. Cause you showed up and yanked me out before we could even ask him." He muttered.  
  
Face still turned away, the tall brunette said nothing for a moment or two. Then, "I've always known you as a do'aho, Hana, but...you may be a true genius in at least one thing. Just when I thought it was impossible for anyone to make me smile and say some damn sentimental words aloud, you succeeded without even trying." He had to repress chuckling, amused and surprised at his own silly truthfulness.  
  
Utterly dumbfounded by Rukawa's obvious attempt to humor, Sakuragi did not even consider a retort for the raven head's rather self-centered comment.  
  
After that his voice hushed into something so warm and delicate it was almost unrecognizable. "Don't think I'm clueless about what just dwelled in your mind, Sakuragi Hanamichi. You feel that you're just interfering with my life." Then he suddenly blurted out in a heatedly emotional voice, "It freaking hurts me to know you're thinking that way, do you know?!" _A two second glimpse of his face tells the whole story better than words._ Finally turning to make eye contact with his red haired companion, "The only thing you've been holding me from is plunging back into that dark, empty hole that was my previous lifestyle! Hana, you're the reason I've been smiling to myself...I don't mind at all living like this forever." For the first time and perhaps the last time ever, Sakuragi witnessed a brief tinge of crimson tracing the pale cheeks of Rukawa Kaede.  
  
Although his mind was still frozen in wonder, Sakuragi's illusionary hand crept towards the boy's slightly reddened face, as if trying to touch the blush itself. His fingers traced gently across the rosy blotches on the ivory smooth face. "Thank you, Kaede, so much." He whispered; the shyness proved to be contagious when the redhead's face turned pink, too. "Because you're the only person that helps me forget I'm living a goddamn fake existence."  
  
The raven head hovered a palm on top of Sakuragi's caressing hand. "Do'aho Hana...I guess I'll have to respect your concern, or else y_ou'd_ never have fun with _me._ If you're really that anxious to get me back to practicing basketball again, then pick a spot for us to hang out now."  
  
_And he thinks I'm clueless about HIS feelings...oh well, stop thinking unhappy thoughts, Hana_. "How bout...we go up to your special mountain again? God, if only we could somehow draw out that gorgeous scenery...hey, what are you smiling about, fox?" the redhead asked curiously. Rukawa was smirking at him...and there was a gleam of playfulness in his eyes.  
  
"You want scenery worth drawing out, Hana?"  
  
=============================================================================================================  
  
Rukawa went back to his house to fetch an old book bag full of some mysterious stuff, then led the way to the district subway. On the way, the inquisitive redhead kept on harassing his ebony haired companion just what was in the bag, but Rukawa adamantly refused to provide even a hint. As the two young men walked out of the station, Sakuragi found the surrounding neighborhood to be familiar...in a somewhat dreading way. _Why do I have this suffocating feeling about this place?_ "Hey Kaede, just where've you taken us? Have I been here before?"  
  
Rukawa stopped in front of the steps of a condo. "Don't freaking tell me you don't remember this place, do'aho." He took a key from under the doormat and opened it.  
  
_Wait a minute...this is the very damn house I walked out with Youhei and Kaede after that accident!_ "Out of all the damn places in the whole world, what's the idea of bringing us here, Kaede?!" The redhead was almost too upset to continue his vent. "Do you know how trapped I feel in there? Those goddamn unpleasant memories of this place? Why'd you do this to me...?!!"  
  
"Sshh...Hana, calm down Hana." The raven head quickly comforted his vexed companion with a hushed voice. "I'm...sorry for being so careless. I swear I never thought of that, but I should've." Then he fixed his eyes on Sakuragi's with a persuading, and almost beseeching look. "Just bear with me, Hana. I've been dying to show you something these past few days, and it wouldn't be the same if I took you somewhere else."  
  
Caught off guard by the pale young man's unexpected apology and coaxing, Sakuragi's accusations quickly died down. _I guess it must be something really special...and the last thing I want to do is freaking ruin it for him. "_Oh all right..." He shot his companion a trusting look, "...and I guess it wouldn't be half as bad, since you're right here by my side anyways, Kaede."  
  
Of course it wouldn't, you do'aho. The raven head thought, absorbing Sakuragi's affection with pleasure. "...seems like that woman's left the house for her job appointment already."  
  
"Hey, how'd you know that, fox? Have you been stalking her or something?" The redhead demanded suspiciously.  
  
"No, do'aho. I rushed to her house this morning, cause you never showed up when I summoned you." Rukawa answered, fighting back a smile.  
  
"What? Oh yeah..." Sakuragi's said in a small voice, feeling embarrassingly guilty. Damn you, Hanamichi...you had him so worried, he'd run all the way here! He followed the raven head down the secret passageway, until they were once more in that same room holding the redhead's perfectly preserved body. _There it is. The ultimate reminder that I...no longer have a damn body.  
_  
Rukawa felt a prick in his heart when he saw the redhead's depressed look. _I know dwelling in this place is the toughest thing for him...but god, please let this ease some of his fear_. The pale young man finally opened the mysterious book bag, and fished out...a large notebook and a pencil.  
  
"?? What is this, Kaede, some kind of stupid joke?! Cause to tell you the damn truth, I don't find it the least bit funny!!" Sakuragi snapped in a very disappointedly hurt tone.  
  
Busily settling himself down, Rukawa held up his hand. "Don't jump to your own conclusions so fast, you do'aho. Just hush up and sit in that corner until I call you." He ordered firmly.  
  
Still sulking, Sakuragi surprised himself by silently obeying the reaven head. He stared as the latter started scribbling on the large notepad while fixing one concentrating eye on the peaceful figure trapped in the tank. "Hey fox, just what the hell are you up to?" He later asked, as curiosity took over his sulkiness.  
  
Rukawa threw him a stern look. "Stay put or else, Hana. I'll show you when I'm done."  
  
Almost twenty minutes had passed before the fidgeting redhead finally lost all his patience. "Damn it, Kaede, this is taking way too long! What...?!" He stormed toward his preoccupied companion, but stopped short when he caught sight of the tall brunette's activity.  
  
The notepad revealed a stunning sketch of his hibernating body; Rukawa had skillfully smeared around the pencil lead to vibrantly bring out the tones and impressions of the redhead's features. "I tried my very best, Hana...but no artist in the whole world can ever capture even a tenth of that beauty. It'll have to do, keeping me company when you're elsewhere, however rough of a drawing it is." _Positioned like that, he's the most beautiful sight I could ever think of sketching...a powerful, golden body softened by that boyishly innocent face. I was afraid of admitting how gorgeous you were, Hana, even to myself...until you revealed mutual feelings, too._  
  
However, to the raven head's dismay, Sakuragi only yelled, "What...are you mocking me, Kaede?! I'm not wearing any goddamn clothes here, for heavens sake! So this is a stupid joke after all, just to embarrass me!"  
  
Hurt and upset, "Don't freaking tell me you've never heard of nude art, you do'aho! Anyone who has an attractive figure is highly prized to be in a drawing, or even a painting...it has nothing to do with being a guy or girl, so stop your narrow mindedness!" the pale boy chided intensely. Then, "...out of all the guys I've seen, you have the best masculine body."  
  
_Oh right...I remember Haruko chan telling me that when we went to the art museum for our class assignment._ "Okay, okay...I take that back, Kaede." Abashed that he unwittingly insulted his companion's effort, Sakuragi quickly tried to change the subject. "But you never told me you can draw, Kaede." The redhead's gaze at the picture turned into an admiring one. "As a tensai, I judge that you did a beautiful job."  
  
"Drawing was a favorite past time for me, until I was ten." _Then my classmate introduced me into the basketball court, where I found I could preoccupy myself from trouble even more affectively._ "And it turned out nicely only cause I was sketching a beautiful object, Hana." _It'll come out as the most gorgeous thing to me, no matter who does the job. _Sakuragi's face looked as if it was set on fire.  
  
"...Oh, uh...I thought you felt the same as that wild monkey Kiyota...that I looked like red-haired ape."  
  
"You do, do'aho, but only when you're acting up on court. Otherwise..." _The rest of the times, you put in my mind the image of a beautiful stallion with a fiery mane.  
_  
Face still red as a tomato, Sakuragi suddenly turned away. "Hey, um Kaede...I you've probably know this to well from a thousand of your lovesick girl fans...but I'm gonna say it anyways. You're really, really beautiful, too, almost perfect." Despite the chiseled features that gave his face a touch of masculine handsomeness, everything else appeared smooth enough to help it elude a rugged look. It complemented his slender yet strong and graceful body perfectly. Only after he rid himself the resentment towards the ivory- pale boy did he realize that Rukawa reminded him so much of those flawlessly carved deity statues displayed at the art museum.  
  
"Hmph." The raven head smirked joyously to himself. "I don't give a crap how I look to other people...but as long as I'm attractive enough to keep your interest, that's all that matters, Hana." He turned when Sakuragi suddenly emitted a giggle. "What now, do'aho?"  
  
"You know what? You're a scheming, manipulative fox...taking advantage of the tensai when he's completely immobile! And it's the first time I really mean it!" Sakuragi cried out laughingly.  
  
Although he knew the redhead meant it as a light-hearted tease, Rukawa still shuddered slightly at the remark. _Feeling the urge to take advantage of him...I've always pushed that goddamn issue in the very back of my head. But what if...one day when we DO revive him, will I be able to control my impulses? Can Hana really take my needs without becoming soiled or hurt?_ His gaze at his hysterically amused companion turned into a sad one. _I guess we can live like this forever, Hana, except for one thing...I desire...carnally, while you don't feel a thing but emotional affection. What if...what if one day I cave into my wants for sex with someone else?! You'll never forgive me, will you?! Damn...!!_ As he was sketching Sakuragi in the nude, a surge of undeniable lust entered his awareness. _I wanted to show off to Hana I'm in fact capable of doing stuff other than fighting and basketball...but it was also an excuse for myself to see him naked again._  
  
"You know what, Kaede? I just remembered that we don't have to walk all the way back to Youhei's house. He told me you can transport me there with your necklace thing."  
  
"Huh. Really."  
  
"I'm serious, fox! And...what you showed me today was really impressive, but I still wanna get out of here as soon as possible. It just makes me feel so lonely." Sakuragi's voice started to lose its lively luster.

_Well...that actually suites me just right. I didn't want to leave this place yet anyways...have one more thing I needed to do, and no way can I do it in front of Hana._ The raven head thought to himself rather grimly. "Fine, then. But make sure you come to me first when I call you tomorrow, or else." He took out the charm to wish Sakuragi to his destination.  
  
"Wait...before you send me off, Kaede, I was wondering if you ever considered going to Kainan instead of Shohoku."  
  
Rukawa paused and stared at the redhead. "What kind of a question is that?"  
  
"Uhm, it's not really anything...I was just curious."  
  
"...no, I never did. Shohoku was my first choice."  
  
"Really? That's great to know." Sakuragi breathed out deeply in relief, baffling the pale brunette. "Well, wish me away, Kaede! I'll see you first thing tomorrow." His companion complied, and sure enough the mist appeared again from nowhere and swept the redhead away.  
  
After he was gone, the raven head gazed blankly at the spot where the redhead had stood. _I lied to him about Shohoku being my first choice...but it shouldn't matter, should it?_ Shohoku, with its failing basketball team and namesake, was actually the last place he and his family wanted to look at. Going to Kainan, or even Shoyo, he'd have a much better chance squeezing himself up to the interhigh championships, and he'd have a valid excuse to live away from his mother and rent an apartment near the prestigious high school. And the only thing that made him change his mind entirely was...a strange voice in his dreams that kept on insisting something important awaited him in Shohoku. For some reason, he strangely believed that the certain something might just be worth sacrificing part of his professional basketball dream...and followed it, against his parents' vehement protests. _He would've found all this so ridiculously stupid anyways, so why bother telling him?_ But it was weird that the redhead would ask in the first place...  
  
A throbbing, needy sensation suddenly turned his attention away from the ponderings. _Right. With Hana gone, I have to accomplish my other purpose._ Rukawa slowly undid his trousers, then turned around to gaze at the exposed figure of the redhead. Hungry eyes devouring every detail of the body before him, he involuntarily edged closer and closer to the tank, his hand creeping down lower to that certain spot. He started rubbing himself, timidly at first, then his movements increasingly quicker and vicious. Mind thrashing in a pool of ecstatic desire and eyes taking in the tantalizing source of his lust, he vaguely heard his own desperate pants, felt a painful tensing of his whole body. After what seemed like an eternity, he climaxed with a straining grunt.  
  
"Hanamichi...ahhh..._Hana_...!!" An orgasmic cry followed, and Rukawa found himself driven away by a massive physical release. Feeling exhausted to the bone, yet pleasantly relieved, the pale boy slumped to the floor and closed his eyes.  
  
After a while, he finally managed to collect his conscious mind together, and opened his eyes. _Shit. I have to clean up this damn mess._ Rukawa impatiently picked himself up, and was frozen in place when he found himself face-to-face with the young man imprisoned inside the tank.  
  
Without thinking, his fingers crept forward to press itself on the glass. "...Hana. You aren't disgusted by me, are you? Because...if you are, I just don't know how I'll live with myself." The hibernating redhead only replied with his peaceful expression, as if assuring that everything was all right. In pained frustration, Rukawa cautiously rapped his knuckle against the tank, and pressed his forehead against the glass. Then he looked up again, and whispered, "I...never had the damn courage to say this in front of you, Hana...but I love you. More than you can ever imagine." With that, he closed his eyes and tenderly kissed the glass wall that was separating their warm lips. _Pathetic. Despite how truly we feel about each other, all I can kiss is air and a freaking glass pane._ The raven head thought to himself bitterly. He had to fight the urge to shatter the obstructing glass, and have a feel of that concealed golden flesh.  
  
Kimura had warned him about falling for the redhead, and with the stupidest arrogance, he assumed he'd be able to prevail over his emotions...now was just the question whether their relationship would be worth keeping. Despite all the joy and brightness Sakuragi had poured into his life, conflicts capable of devastating both of them were bound to emerge eventually.  
  
=========================================================================================================  
  
Back at Youhei's house:  
  
"...I didn't get you in too much trouble with Rukawa, did I, Hana?"  
  
"No...he's a hell of a lot more understanding than we thought...but at the same time, so protective, too." The redhead replied in an almost dreamy voice.  
  
"Really...I'm glad, then." Youhei forced himself to smile. "Well...whatcha wanna do now, o' buddy? Let's take a relaxer before we get back to serious business."  
  
"Right. Hey, isn't it Sunday? War movies are on all day today on channel 8!"  
  
Youhei frowned. "That's the last thing I'd do as a relaxer, Hanamichi."  
  
"Hey...what's with you, Youhei? I once thought you were almost as tough as the tensai!"  
  
"Hmph. Fine. No way I can refuse now!" The shorter brunette grinned at his best friend.  
  
"Heh heh heh..." was all the redhead could chuckle before being forcefully drawn into yet another envisioned world. This time he was...in Rukawa's house. Right beside him, crouched under the first floor staircase, was himself...but this time he noticed that he was several years older, at least 21 or 22. Then he heard a familiar voice muttering.  
  
"...not to lay a hand on Sakuragi Hanamichi, no matter what my mother instructs you. Otherwise, the punishment I myself decide upon you will leave you wishing that you were never freaking born! I promise that to you." The envisioning Sakuragi turned around and saw his pale companion, also looking five or six years older, pacing back and forth, eyes set in the hardest glare he'd ever seen. A line of tough-looking men, save one petite young man with freckles standing in the middle, were dressed in formal suits and ties, and lined up like refined soldiers.  
  
_That freckles guy, Suzuki Masato again._..the redhead thought to himself. Suddenly the cherubic young man let out a laugh. "Seeing how impossibly persistent Sakuragi san is, I don't believe any of us can keep him away, anyways. Perhaps the only way to persuade him is if Kaede-san does the dirty work himself." He commented in a chillingly thoughtful tone.  
  
Instantly, Rukawa's eyes widened with rage, and he spun around to grab Suzuki's collar in a painfully tight grip. "And just what was that supposed to mean?" He demanded dangerously through gritted teeth.  
  
"C—calm down, Kaede san. I was just joking, that's all." Suzuki hastily tried to assure the enraged raven head.  
  
"You don't make freaking jokes about Hana like that." He pushed away the freckled young man roughly. "That's to teach you all...if I hear _anything_ negative about Sakuragi Hanamichi muttered around me, I swear that you'd feel ten times the discomfort he did!! Dismissed!"  
  
As the fuming raven head and the uneasy bodyguards scattered to their separate ways, Suzuki Masato discreetly made his way to the stairwell where a 21 year old red head was hiding. He stooped down and whispered, "I know you were eavesdropping over there the whole time, Sakuragi san." He leaned forward slightly, his tone changing into a subtly menacing one. "Keeping you from Kaede san used to be my occupational obligation, but now it has become my personal vow...I've fallen for him as well. So be on your toes, Sakuragi Hanamichi, because I'll make him mine, no matter the cost." With that, he disappeared swiftly before the stunned red-haired young man could come out and retort.  
  
"Hana...what's the matter with you now?" Youhei eyed him with concerned.  
  
"Oh, it's nothing. Just another stupid vision."  
  
"Really...what about?"  
  
"Ahhh...some mushy scene between me and Kaede." Sakuragi lied because he didn't want his best friend to fret more than he had to.  
  
"Okay, then...spare me the details."  
  
_God please assure me this isn't a prequel to that horrible vision...I don't want to be reminded of it one second! Please tell me there's no way in hell Kaede and I'll become such hateful enemies...but that's downright impossible...right?_  
  
=============================================================================================================  
  
**Eleven thirty p.m. in the Shohoku gymnasium:  
**  
Huffing and puffing, a tall blue-eyed brunette bent down in exhaustion after making his 100th basket. Not bad at all...a few days of missing practice haven't altered his perfect scoring a bit. He trudged toward his gym bag and fished out a bottle of water to quench his thirst. _Hana...I've always thought of him as a self-important do'aho, but he actually perceived my desire to resume practicing. But then again...the passion wears out so fast without him there by my side._ Frustrated with the empty loneliness, Rukawa closed his eyes and imagined..._Sakuragi Hanamichi, clad in their team attire, leaning on the wall, having watched his play with undivided attention. The red-haired young man clapped his hands and smiled proudly at the tall brunette's last basket. "Even now we're a couple, you never tire in showing off your skills, huh, old fox? Well, you just obliged the tensai to step up again and show that he's just as good as you..." the redhead undid his jacket and made his way casually toward his companion. "...no worse, but no better either, Kaede." The look he shot the pale boy was not of fiery challenge, but a teasingly loving one instead_.  
  
Without even aware of it, a small smile tugged at the corner of the daydreaming pale boy. "...you disappoint me, do'aho. Where's that brash confidence to beat me gone to?" He unwittingly murmured the words out loud.  
  
"The tensai requires no brash confidence, especially around one he's known forever." An older male's casual voice snapped the raven head out of his reverie. He spun around and leaning relaxingly against the open gym doors...was a tall man, cap concealing all his hair, and a red bandage bound completely around his face. Only his eyes, hidden behind sunglasses, nose and mouth remained unwrapped. "That would be the sixteen-year old Sakuragi Hanamichi's most likely response, wouldn't it?" He chuckled lightly.  
  
_That man is...Aka? What...?_ In his shock, Rukawa let the basketball slip from his arm.  
  
Leaving the doorway, Aka walked slowly toward the stunned raven head and stopped three or four feet from him. For the first time, Rukawa could see that the man was very tall, probably as tall as he was. "Don't you remember that Kimura woman's warning? I'd find you before you find me, Rukawa Kaede." He said in an amused tone. There was something very familiar about that man's voice...but Rukawa just couldn't put his finger on it.  
  
"What the hell do you want?" The pale boy finally found his voice. "And just who are you."  
  
The man with the bandaged face paused for a minute or two before replying, "I'll make you a deal."  
  
"...what freaking deal?"  
  
"We play a one-on-one. You win, I reveal myself with no further favors. I win, you have to give me what I want."  
  
Surprised, Rukawa suspiciously arched an eyebrow at him. "And what the hell is that?"  
  
"I can't tell you just yet. But if you don't accept my proposal, I'd be on my way." As Aka turned to go, the raven head stopped him.  
  
"All right, you can have your freaking way. Let's get this damn match over with." I_ have to know his identity and his connection with Hana's accident, no matter the risk!  
_  
Aka smirked at him with satisfaction underneath his bandages. "Great." He took off his coat to reveal a wide frame and very beautifully athletic body, clad in a short-sleeved white top. He left his cap, bandages, and sunglasses on.  
  
Rukawa gaped at the exposure. _That body...for some reason looks so familiar...in a pleasing way. Never mind, I'll win him for sure and find out just who he is!!_ He promised himself with the utmost determination.  
  
The two played for almost an hour. To the raven head's consternation, Aka was playing with relative casualness, while he himself had to work his head off just to match him. Finally, the two stopped at a deadlock score.  
  
"Good game." Aka reached out his hand, only to have it pushed away by the pale boy.  
  
"It was not a fair game at all you, SOB. You were playing damn easy on me." The panting Rukawa hissed through clenched teeth.  
  
The bandaged man let out a small despising laugh. "You're just that same cold bastard, Rukawa Kaede, no matter how old you are. So...I guess since neither of us won, we'd better fulfill both of our favors."  
  
_Shit._ The tall brunette cursed to himself. An unknown fear had seized him when the other mentioned that he had to give him what he wanted. _But as long as I find out who he is...  
_  
Very slowly, Aka took off his sunglasses to reveal a pair of large brown eyes...very lovely yet fearful ones, glinting with some maniacal coldness. Damn. Why am I shuddering? Rukawa wondered. Subsequently, the man slowly unwound the blood crimson bandages, bit by bit, uncovering...  
  
Rukawa's eyes dilated with pure horror at the sight of Aka's face. He shook his head in utter disbelief. _No...NO!! It—it CAN'T BE!!!  
_  
Reading his thoughts though that appalled expression, the older man smiled rather stonily. "Hmph...this should freaking convince you from denial." He lifted his cap, letting fall beautiful short locks of hair...of the most fiery red color. There stood in front of him was a tall, powerfully-built man with light-golden skin and red hair, in his late twenties...unmistakably, Sakuragi Hanamichi. Every characteristic undeniably belonged to the red- haired young man he'd known so well and fallen for...except those warm, innocent brown eyes, somehow transformed into icily malicious ones.  
  
"Well...now I've given you what you've wanted, it's time for you to fulfill _your_ part." With that, he suddenly pounced on the pale young man and pinned him down forcefully. Shocked and frantic with fright, Rukawa struggled with all his might, but to no avail...that older Sakuragi had become much stronger than him. Tearing the brunette's shirt off, he took a piece of the cloth and gagged the boy. Then down went Rukawa's shorts...  
  
Despite the frenzied fight, the mature redhead's eyes remained maliciously calm throughout. Wild thrashes and grunts were vaguely heard outside the gym. If it weren't for the tight gag, the pale boy's screams would surely have been heard by those around the Shohoku campus.  
  
Sweating slightly, the older redhead jeered at the prostrate, completely naked pale figure, still bound and gagged, breathing heavily. "Huh. Anyone can tell from your face that you enjoyed being taken so violently...now you see for yourself what you are, Rukawa Kaede? A pathetic, lowly worm with the most disgusting appetite, and deserves no one's pity." He brusquely untied the boy's hands and feet, and dumped beside him what remained of his clothes. "As you may've guessed, I'm Sakuragi Hanamichi, eleven years from now, and I've traveled to the past to make some necessary corrections." The man informed him in a nonchalant voice.  
  
As he collected his coat and sunglasses, he heard Rukawa moan weakly, "Why...why...are you doing this...why?"  
  
The mature Sakuragi stopped in his steps for a moment. "Because of you. It's entirely because of you." He grated with a hoarse voice full of venom. "I'm just paying back some of the hateful deeds you've done to _me_ from the future. And FYI, we've learned to hate each other enough to kill." He started leaving again, but not before warning the limp boy harshly, "Make sure no one finds out my identity or this event, Rukawa...I know where my past self's body is hidden, and I can destroy it anytime I need to."  
  
Outside the gym, the older red-haired man started chuckling to himself as he put his cap and sunglasses back on. "Finally...there's no freaking way they'd get together now...you'll really regret not making sure I was dead after shooting me, Rukawa Kaede...!" Suddenly, the mature Sakuragi's eyes widened in pain, and he clutched his head as if suffering from an excruciating headache. With a loud snarl, he banged his head viciously against the stone wall. "Shut the hell up! I don't care how badly I just freaking hurt him! That bastard took myself away from me once...I have to prevent him from doing it this time by breaking him first!!" He screamed at the top of his lungs. Panting heavily, he became quickly aware of the lights being flicked on in the surrounding houses...seemed like he yelled a little too loud. "Shit!" The older Sakuragi broke into a swift run, quickly disappearing out of sight before anyone could catch a glimpse of him. As he was sprinting away, he kept on chanting to himself. "No one's innocent. No one can stop me, not even myself. No one's innocent..."  
  
Thirty minutes later, a tall pale boy, clad in a torn shirt and shorts, dragged himself limply in the direction of his house...his gym bag and bicycle were left behind. Dull, empty eyes staring straight ahead of him, Rukawa's steps were mechanical and lifeless, just like a robot. The only thing he was capable of thinking was: _Why, Hana...what has happened to us...WHY?? _Suddenly, an overwhelming wave of nausea hit the young man, and he bent down to vomit in the gutter; confused fear and self-disgust flooded his senses. After the blue-eyed brunette finally ceased vomiting, he realized that for the first time in almost ten years, he was sobbing so uncontrollably hard that his jaw started to ache...almost as hard as that bruised and naked eight year old boy being atrociously abused by his teen cousin.  
  
=======================================================================================================================  
  
Slumping herself on the living room couch, Kimura took a long drink from her coffee, and sighed. "You've finally gone that far, haven't you, Sakuragi Hanamichi from the future. Should I have told you the truth from the start? That interfering with past events will only create alternate realities, and change nothing for you, nor the future you reside in? But...I unintentionally lead you on with the false hopes, since your wretched desperation was so unbearable." She murmured silently to herself. "You wanted to prove that even your innocent past self would allow Rukawa Kaede's death...thus, you sent me to warn him ahead of time. It was all about easing your own guilt of killing your once inseparable lover was it not? Unlucky for you, the outcome turned out entirely different." The young fortune teller closed her eyes in resignation. "...just who'd ever thought it would turn out to be such an irrevocable mess?"  
  
TBC


End file.
